Top Ten Cloves: Other Ways SouthWest Airlines Thought of Telling Kevin Smith He Was Fat

News Item: Kevin Smith: Too fat to fly? ...The director gets grounded by Southwest but proves the supersonic power of social media

10. Not sure of their inventory, ask Smith if he would be bothered sharing food cart with other passengers

9. Since flight was going to Burbank, ask Smith if he was contestant on "Biggest Loser"

8. Rather than board plane by sections, or rows, call boarding by height and weight

7. Keep calling him Dom DeLuise

6. Make pointed apology to Smith, that the In-Flight movie was 'La 'Grande Bouffe'

5. Advise Smith, In case they had a Captain Sullenberger moment, he would have to stand on other wing, alone, to balance weight of plane

4. Ask him if he was related to Chef Paul Prudhomme

3. Inquire if his real name was "Tuesday" and did he come from New Orleans

2. Jet tire ... Smith standing next to it ... Ask boarding passengers to vote which one was slimmer

1. Have him get on moving sidewalk in terminal lobby, and see if it still moved


Bonus Kevin Smith Riffs

Kate Harding: Kevin Smith Kicked off Southwest Flight for Being Fat

Menachem Kaiser: Twitter Wars: Kevin Smith vs. Southwest Airlines

Foster Kamer: Update: The Kevin Smith Southwest Airlines Fat-Flight Tweakout of Epic Proportion

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