Thursday 15 December 2005

White House To Extend President's Speaking Tour

May Venture Delivering Addresses Before 'Regular Folk"; Next Four Speeches To Tout "Historic Vote Count"

The White House announced today that, with the warm-up of "four hits under his belt", President Bush will extend his "speaking tour" throughout the winter. This would include the possibility of having the President speak to "regular folks" and some of the addresses may feature a special guest - Senator Joe Lieberman (D-CT).

"We're really pumped" offered Communication Director Nicolle Devenish Wallace. "The President is beginning to get his confidence and pacing down, hitting his marks and we're still able to get away with tying the Sept 11th attacks to Saddam and Iraq and the justification for the war."

A search by The Garlic showed that the White House Travel Office is blocking out dates into March 2006 and booking hotel rooms in major cities across the country.

Wallace also indicted that "a number of these new speeches will be in front of average citizens."

"The President is eager to hit the road and talk with, what he calls, 'regular folks'. He wants to get his message directly to the people"

Wallace indicated the venues for the President's speeches will be varied, and include major conservative institutions, colleges and universities and, possibly, "one or two major arena events".

"We're really going to do this big," offered Wallace. "We'll have T-Shirts, CD's, DVD's and, for the younger generation, immediate downloads of the President's speeches to their iPods or MP3's."

Wallace refused to confirm or deny that there could be other practical matters for the President continuing his speaking tour.

According to Ann Mitchell, veteran Capital Hill journalist, one of the reasons to continue the speaking tour is to "continue dodging Cindy Sheehan".

"I have sources that are telling me," said Mitchell, "that the White House is intent on 'breaking down' Sheehan. They keep him moving around and make her spend more money following him. If the schedule is what I hear it is, they'll be in-and-out of cities before Sheehan can even arrive there."

Another source told Mitchell that they will be targeting speeches in areas close to Washington D.C. and Austin, TX, in an effort to "influence potential jurors" in the upcoming trials of former Vice President Chief of Staff Lewis "Scooter" Libby and former House Leader Tom Delay.

The Garlic has also learned that the Lincoln Group has secured additional contracts, to produce pro-American and pro-Iraqi Government stories "specifically around the Presidents speaking schedule".

"They're laying out," said our source who asked to remain anonymous, "a whole list of new historic events and happenings for Iraq in 2006."

Among the new historic events will be the upcoming "Historic Vote Count" and the "Historic First Day of the new Iraqi Parliament".

In a surprising move, according to Wallace, the President may be joined in selected cities by a special guest, Senator Joe Lieberman (D-CT), who has been an ardent supporter of the Bush Administration's Iraq War plans.

"Joe will be with us," said Wallace. "He's pretty jazzed by it already."

Extra security was in place for today's historic Iraqi vote for Democracy