Friday, March 07, 2008

Top Ten Cloves: If Hillary Clinton Is A Monster, The Movies That Would Be Made About Her


News Item: 'Hillary Clinton's a monster': Obama aide blurts out attack in Scotsman interview


10. I Was A Teenage Hillary Clinton

9. Friday The Hillary Clinton

8. Frankenhillary

7. Hillary Clinton of the Corn

6. Village of The Hillary Clinton

5. HillaryClintonknockers

4. Rosemary's Hillary Clinton

3. Texas Chainsaw Hillary Clinton

2. Night of the Living Hillary Clinton

1. The Hillary Clinton That Ate Tokyo

Bonus Five More Monster Hillary Movies
5. Bride of Frankenhillary

4. Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenhillary

3. The Amityville Hillary

2. 13 Hillary Clintons

1. The Hillary Clinton of the Opera

(H/T to Monster Movies)


Bonus Brouhaha Riffs

The Swamp: Obama adviser regrets calling Clinton a 'monster'

TPM Election Central: Power Resigns Over Hillary-Is-Monster Comment

David Corn: In "Monster"-Gate, Clintonites Get Away with a Slur, While Respected Obama Aide Falls


Vote For Hillary!



This Date ... On The Garlic


Garlic History - On This Day


7 March 2006... On The Garlic

Vote For The Garlic!


7 March 2005... On The Garlic

Rumsfeld Defends Shooting Italians

Syrian Pullout Hinges on Moving Van Backlog

Top Ten Cloves: Signs The Government Is Screwing with Your Private Retirement Account


Thursday, March 06, 2008

Top Ten Cloves: Reasons John McCain Was Late Yesterday, To Receive His Endorsement From President Bush


News Item: McCain Makes Bush Wait


10. Had to drive around, to lose Joe Lieberman, who wanted to tag along

9. Couldn't decide whether to wear a regular business suit, or maybe the President would appreciate him showing up in his old flightsuit

8. Wanted to finish up writing some letters for his lobbyist friends

7. Actually, was detained by Secret Service, over his "wanting to shoot Obama" comment

6. Couldn't find his passport, and got a little paranoid, in case the "born in the Panama Canal" thing came up

5. Is it his age?... Woke up, forgot he was the nominee

4. Wanted to study the details of serving as Bush's Third Term before accepting the endorsement

3. Overslept (He hasn't been sleeping well since seeing Hillary's Hillary's 3AM Ad)

2. Was negotiating with White House, to see if he could bring in Bill Cunningham again, to warm up the crowd

1. Busy, calling Mitt Romney, over-and-over, and just saying "Na-Na-Na-Na-Na ... I got the nomination ... I got the nomination"


Bonus McCain Riffs

Think Progress: Bush tap dances while waiting for McCain

The Carpetbagger Report: Bush hands McCain the baton

Think Progress: Bush: McCain ‘Is Not Going To Change’ My Foreign Policy

He's A Senator - And A Dessert Topping!

The Bob Dole For The New Millennium


Bonus Bonus

Keith Olbermann: Bush the endorser




This Date ... On The Garlic


Garlic History - On This Day



6 March 2007... On The Garlic

The Laura Bush Bummer Bombing-of-the Day

Top Ten Cloves: Things Ann Coulter Would Spend "Coulter Cash" On


6 March 2006... On The Garlic

More Bush Troubles As Rice Backtracks, Corrects Comments, Blames Lincoln Group


The Garlic Nabs 4th Nomination; Koufax Voting Now Open


Top Ten Cloves: Things Overheard At The Oscars Last Night



Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Best of Day! ... Dennis Perrin

Fox News, which looks like something they pipe into solitary cells in federal prisons ..."
Between the Ming Dynasty-like schedule of debates, the coverage of voting night by the Cable News guys (heaven forbid, the networks interrupt their idolized reality shows) has, in most cases, rivaled Ronald Reagan's funeral (I think if you search in the 200-range of your cable channels, you may be able to find the Old Gipper's burial still going on).

Is there really a need to go on-air some two-to-three-hours before the polls close?

At this point, about the best Exit Poll data they have is the extrapolation of the 16 people who voted between 2-3PM, not, necessarily, a hindrance to the gasbags to dribble out their theories and begin testing their narratives, which they will babble on endlessly, during the final six-hours of broadcast after the polls close?

Just some random musings, a prelude to hipping you to our second offering of Best of Day (okay, we've fallen down a bit on this, as it should be highlighted with greater frequency)

Dennis Perrin, in his post "Where Have You Gone, Diane Linkletter?", riffing on watching the primary returns last evening, had a falling-over-with-tears hysterical line.
"Of the three major channels, MSNBC has to be the worst. Chris Matthews, Keith Olbermann and Tim Russert taken all at once is too much for the sober mind to process, their pale, sagging faces morphing into a single yammering unit. Toss in Stepford Anchor Norah O'Donnell and the mummified remains of Tom Brokaw, and who needs hallucinogens? Granted, MSNBC is bad acid, cut with the cheapest crank, but you'll experience insane images and sounds not found at its competitors, especially Fox News, which looks like something they pipe into solitary cells in federal prisons."

Visit (and bookmark) Dennis Perrin



Bonus Links

Riding The Woody Allen Train To Last Night's MSNBC Democrat Debate

Obama Romps ... And, Gloria Borger, with The Best Political Team on Television, Sticks Her Neck Out

WaPo Consults Ministry of Silly Walks, Backtracks From Obama Conspiracy

"Listen to me! Please listen! If you don't, if you won't, if you fail to understand, then the same incredible terror that's menacing me WILL STRIKE AT YOU!"
Forget about Obama and the Canadian Embassy, The Washington Post, apparently, huddled with Monty Pythons' "Ministry of Silly Walks" and rocketed backwards, from their their Woman-Bashing Op-Ed of Sunday.

The Washington Post’s failed effort at satire?
“If it insulted people, that was not the intent,” Outlook editor John Pomfret told me this morning, calling the piece “tongue-in-cheek.” […]

Pomfret said that being an opinion article, he’s not surprised readers reacted to it strongly. But added: “Perhaps it wasn’t packaged well enough to make it clear that it was tongue-in-cheek.”

Even if intended as a joke, the Allen piece clearly isn’t the best way for the Post to achieve its goal of bringing in more women readers, and it remains to be seen if the fallout continues today.

They even changed the headline!


And WaPo's Ombudsman isn't buying into it.


As The Garlic pointed out, this appeared to be a very sly, crafty collaboration, between the WaPo, Charlotte Allen and Hillary Clinton, to put out such an offensive Op-Ed, insulting and degrading woman, two-days before Little Super Tuesday, and look what happened;

Clinton revives campaign in Ohio, Texas

And, as we cautioned;
"And they come out with this, what do we want to call it, this Hillary Manifesto, at this late stage ... Yes, Allen and The Washington Post has thrown in their lot with the Freakshow ... They want a Hillary-McCain finale ... Their in league with McCain and the RNC ...
So, how do you explain this;
Limbaugh urges listeners to vote for Clinton

And Hillary, seemingly, returning the favor;
Clinton praises McCain’s experience

Even the one of the Freakshow's biggest Freaks has questions, as do the exit polls.

Was this woman-bashing Op-Ed part of the Clinton Campaign's "Kitchen Sink" strategy?

If so, watch out ladies, there'll be more incoming ... Perhaps a new batch of 3AM Ads- something like 3:15AM and 3:30AM, just to keep the pressure on, to maintain the fear level just right ... To keep woman awake, sleepless, and getting angry about it

And then, WHAMO!, Hillary and her cohorts hit with another insulting piece, probably dissing woman, for not being able to trust a candidate who will allow them the luxury of a decent night's sleep.

Maybe, after all those years of railing against the "vast rightwing conspiracy", Hillary has decided to team up with it

Obama can't keep you safe ... Obama won't let you sleep ...

Watch out, all you people in Pennsylvania ...

Think of this post (and taking a liberty) as Kevin McCarthy, in the waning moments of "Invasion of the Body Snatchers"
"She's here already! You're next!!"

Bonus Links

Monty Python - Ministry of Silly Walks

Media Matters: Despite paper's concern "about keeping women as newspaper readers," Wash. Post published essay calling women "kind of dim" and "the stupid sex"

Crooks and Liars: Why the Washington Post can’t satisfy their women (or, Tweety eat yer heart out!)

Jane Hamsher: “Tongue In Cheek?” Nice Try

Rachel Sklar: WaPo Writer Proves Own Thesis With Inane Op-Ed

Jeff Fecke: Don't You Angry Feminists Have a Sense of Humor?

Marc Andreessen: An hour and a half with Barack Obama


Boy, they should drop millions of copies of this from an airplane over the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.


We're going to have to buckle in, for days-on-end, of the Clinton Campaign spinning and smearing how Hillary, despite being behind in the delegate and vote count, is winning all the "big" states, the "bellweather" states, the states Democrats are going to need to win in the General Election.

True enough.

However, the converse must also be true - that Hillary can't win the small states, the caucuses, and those will also need to be won in November.

To that, you can also question how, in some of these "small" states, the Hillary Campaign blew them off, or put little effort into them. Is that the strategy we want to invest in for the General Election?

And before you let all the bubbles and confetti from Texas and Ohio blur your vision, since Super Tuesday, the head-to-head record in primaries and caucuses is 13-3, in favor of Obama.

All of this, and more, will be hashed and rehashed in the days and weeks ahead (Go to Memeoradum for the multitude of articles and latest updates)

We digress, wanting to call attention to a recent post from Marc Andreessen, the Silicon Valley "whiz kid" entrepreneur best known as co-author of Mosaic, the first widely-used web browser, and co-founder of Netscape Communications Corporation.

"An hour and a half with Barack Obama"


Andreessen writes of meeting with Obama, in early 2007, before the big show got on the road;

"The reason I think you may find this interesting is that our meeting in early 2007 was probably one of the last times Senator Obama was able to spend an hour and a half sitting down and talking with just about anyone -- so I think we got a solid look at what he's like up close, right before he entered the "bubble" within which all major presidential candidates, and presidents, must exist.:
And the first impression that Andreessen notes is that Obama is a "normal guy";
"We were able to have an actual, honest-to-God conversation, back and forth, on a number of topics. In particular, the Senator was personally interested in the rise of social networking, Facebook, Youtube, and user-generated content, and casually but persistently grilled us on what we thought the next generation of social media would be and how social networking might affect politics -- with no staff present, no prepared materials, no notes. He already knew a fair amount about the topic but was very curious to actually learn more. We also talked about a pretty wide range of other issues, including Silicon Valley and various political topics.

With most politicians, their curiosity ends once they find out how much money you can raise for them. Not so with Senator Obama -- this is a normal guy."
There's a lot more to this post, including;
"What's the picture that emerges from these four impressions?

Smart, normal, curious, not radical, and post-Boomer.

If you were asking me to write a capsule description of what I would look for in the next President of the United States, that would be it."

Take some time and read "An hour and a half with Barack Obama"


(H/T To Fred Wilson)


Bonus Links

Brilliant at Breakfast: Somewhere in New York, Rudy Giuliani is wailing, "Why didn't fear work for ME?"

Josh Marshall: Final Thoughts

Glenn Greenwald: The "Rezko" game

Mark Halperin: Clinton Wins Big, But Math is Troubling


This Date ... On The Garlic


Garlic History - On This Day


5 March 2007... On The Garlic

New Feature - The Laura Bush Bummer Bombing-of-the Day; Warning - Bypass this post if you don't want to be discouraged

Don't Worry Tim, The Vice President Still Loves Ya! ... The Results - The Garlic's Weekly Poll


5 March 2006... On The Garlic

Weekend Special - Sautéed Cloves


Tuesday, March 04, 2008

She Comes With A Tinfoil Hat, But That's Not So Bad, Is It Mitt? ... The Results - The Garlic's Weekly Poll


It's gotta be, kind of, tough for Make-Up Mitt this evening.


Here's Johnny Boy McCain wrapping up the Republican nomination this evening (at least, as of the time of this writing, that's what's being projected).

Ain't that a kick-in-the-pants ...

It had to be so tantalizing ... The breaking of a "scandal" ... Attractive female lobbyist ... Favors being done ... Letter writing...

Maybe, he gathered the boys around, and they set up a phone bank in their Belmont basement ... Maybe even had little contests, of who could come up with the most outrageous rumor they could phone to the media ... Or, who could disguise their voice the best ... Who could do the funniest accent when dishing the dirt on McCain ...

And, our Garlic Poll Voters felt that, for such hard work, the new, unsuspended campaign would have a Romney Girl - the bubbling Oscar winner Marion Cotillard.

Yeah, she might have a few tinfoil hats that she may wear on the campaign trail, but believing landing on the moon was a hoax, and the Sept. 11th attack on the WTC has more to do with saving on remolding, than it being a terror attack, isn't that far off the beaten path of that Mormon Faith that doesn't get brought up very often, certainly not included in your "I Am Spartacus" speech, early on the campaign

Heck, Mitt, with Cotillard on your side, you could have probably pulled a good chunk of the Ron Paul base.


The Results - The Garlic's Weekly Poll February 25 - March 4, 2008

For Mitt Romney to jump back in the Presidential Race, he needs to ...

1. Hire bubbling Oscar winner Marion Cotillard as new Romney Girl Tally 34%

2. Stop singing rap tunes Tally 26%

3. Get a photo of himself out there, in Somalian gear Tally 21%

4. For winning over GOP base, declare you saw your father march with Ronald Reagan Tally 19%

This week’s Poll - With Hillary Clinton continuing on, she should change her campaign slogan (H/T Barry Crimmins) to ...

Scroll up to the top right corner to place your vote

Editor's Note: Slow Boat To Posting ...


Good Evening Garlic Fans


Just a note to say we've been stuck in the much-dreaded Computer Hell the past two-days, though, not completely singed.

The issue has to do with a computer, operating at a snail's pace (causing, for instance, it taking nearly three-minutes-plus for a single email to drop in; and it going to error message and constant recycling if multiple emails are arriving).

Needless to say, I have been as frustrated as a superdelegate waiting for this campaign to end, and spent the better part of yesterday, running scans, tests, reloads, etc, all to no avail.

So, I called the "Big Bad ISP Computer Company", full expecting, as happened last month, when this issue first surfaced, of being dumped over to "Larry" in India, and enduring "Larry" reading down his sheet of prompts ("Are you at the computer? ... Is the computer turned on?").

It was painless.

A test email showed the technician that I was not exaggerating, and he then "pinged" my modem and it sounded like he said, a low, mumbled "Oh shit".

It be the modem, he indicated and the earliest I can have it replaced is Saturday (for some reason, the problem, or the modem is not such that I could unplug everything, go to their service center to return it, get a new one, come home, plug everything back in and be back in, presumably, operating business in less then 2-hours).

In the meantime, I can, likely (and that has been erratic) have normal operations - all I have to do is turn off my virus protection.

So, I will stagger and endeavor to get back up to speed on the posting (beginning this evening) and, hopefully, keep my sanity (yeah, right, like I had that to begin with).

As always, many thanks for coming to The Garlic!

Peace
JTD

This Date ... On The Garlic


Garlic History - On This Day


4 March 2005... On The Garlic

Millionaire Flyer Charged With Security Violations

Charity Raises $650G For New Monkey Name

Top Ten Cloves: Things Bill Gates Will Do With His Knighthood



Monday, March 03, 2008

The New Hillary Soundtrack


Much as been made of Hillary Clinton's 3AM Fearmongering Ad (and, yes, The Garlic was in on the making).


And, of course, there was yesterday's launch, by The Washington Post, to undermine Obama and create a rallying cry for Hillary.

So, what's lacking here is a soundtrack ... Some good music to carry the day.

We found, what we believe, is the right song, for the right moment (and we don't even have to change the lyrics)

Call Me

If you're feeling sad and lonely
There's a service I can render
Tell the one who loves you only
I can be so warm and tender
Call me, don't be afraid, you can call me
Maybe it's late, but just call me
Tell me, and I'll be around ...

When it seems your friends desert you
There's somebody thinking of you
I'm the one who'll never hurt you
Maybe that's because I love you
Call me, don't be afraid, you can call me
Maybe it's late, but just call me
Tell me, and I'll be around ...

Now don't forget me
'Cause if you let me
I will always stay by you
You've got to trust me
That's how it must be
There's so much that I can do ...

If you call I'll be right with you
You and I should be together
Take this love I long to give you
I'll be at your side forever
Call me, don't be afraid, you can call me
Maybe it's late, but just call me
Tell me and I'll be around ...

Here's one of the better renditions of the song, by Astrud Gilberto, with Walter Wanderley

This Date ... On The Garlic


Garlic History - On This Day


3 March 2007... On The Garlic

Chopped Garlic: Yeah, What Coulter Said Was Horrible, But Did She Write It?


3 March 2005... On The Garlic

Volkswagan Halts Call For Drivers

Third of Americans Unaware of New Month

Stunning Gaffe By Queen Has England in Uproar

Top Ten Cloves: Other Things WorldCom's Bernie Ebbers Didn't Know


Sunday, March 02, 2008

What Else Could It Be? ... WaPo Launches Plan, Push To Elect Hillary!


Am I the only one that sees this?


The blogosphere and World Wide Web is in conflagration today, over the Op-Ed piece, in The Washington Post by Charlotte Allen;

We Scream, We Swoon. How Dumb Can We Get?
This is how it opens;
"Here's Agence France-Presse reporting on a rally for Sen. Barack Obama at the University of Maryland on Feb. 11: "He did not flinch when women screamed as he was in mid-sentence, and even broke off once to answer a female's cry of 'I love you, Obama!' with a reassuring 'I love you back.' " Women screamed? What was this, the Beatles tour of 1964? And when they weren't screaming, the fair-sex Obama fans who dominated the rally of 16,000 were saying things like: "Every time I hear him speak, I become more hopeful." Huh?

“Women ‘Falling for Obama,’ ” the story’s headline read. Elsewhere around the country, women were falling for the presidential candidate literally. Connecticut radio talk show host Jim Vicevich has counted five separate instances in which women fainted at Obama rallies since last September. And I thought such fainting was supposed to be a relic of the sexist past, when patriarchs forced their wives and daughters to lace themselves into corsets that cut off their oxygen.

I can’t help it, but reading about such episodes of screaming, gushing and swooning makes me wonder whether women — I should say, “we women,” of course — aren’t the weaker sex after all. Or even the stupid sex, our brains permanently occluded by random emotions, psychosomatic flailings and distraction by the superficial. Women “are only children of a larger growth,” wrote the 18th-century Earl of Chesterfield. Could he have been right?"
And it goes on (and on) evoking every slight, slander and stereotype against woman.

The above-mention conflagration?

How Dumb?, says Mustang Bobby ... "Outrageous" screams Jay Newton-Small... "Speak for Yourself, Charlotte" cautions Maha ... Taking a more noble approach, The Carpetbagger Report with its' "In defense of women everywhere"

And Jane Hamsher, over on Firedoglake, is fit-to-be-tied;
"I hope you, like any thinking person, are completely horrified that the Post would publish the insane, sexist screed by Charlotte F. Allen that appeared in your paper today. And no, just because it got farmed out to some woman eager to advance herself at the expense of the rest of us does not make it okay (one Maureen Dowd on the planet is one too many, thank you very much).

I'd very much like to know who assigned this piece, who edited it, what the reaction is from women who work there, and anything you can tell me about how this insufferably ignorant woman made her way into your pages.

You can contact me at firedoglake AT gmail.com.

All communications will be kept confidential."

Admittedly, I had to check the byline a few times ... In my head, I kept expecting to see the name "Ann Coulter" or, perhaps, "Debbie Schlussel" but no, there it was, Charlotte Allen

Oh, man, how can no one else see this for what it is?

I mean, clearly, this is an attempt by Allen, and The Washington Post, to give Hillary and her campaign a huge push, a rallying cry, a clarion bell wake-up call.

I'm sure that they are expecting, just so that woman won't stand accused of following the script of Allen, and the Washington Post, woman will stop fainting and swooning at Obama rallies. The Obama staff can save some of the outrageous sums of money they are raising, by dismissing the ambulance and medical staff ... No Fainting Here is now the order.

Heck, they're probably looking for the credit when woman will just stop going to Obama rallies ... Perhaps they'll show up at Hillary's events, and begin fainting and swooning there.

That, I believe must be what Allen, and the WaPo are aiming for ... Subtle, but so deft of them.

A few harsh words here, a crazy paragraph there ... Dissing Hillary's campaign, her staff ...

Tough Love, I suppose ...

It, I'm sure they have it planned, that, though not limited to just females, woman, in staggering, astronomical numbers, will be so outraged by this essay, they will march to the polls, by the scores-of-thousands (heck, it will almost look like an Obama rally), to vote for Hillary.

They'll be chanting "No More Questions ,,, Hillary's The Answer!", and, not to emulate Allen's essay in anyway, dressed in dirty tee-shirts, some wearing those plastic helmets that can hold two beer cans, with straws dangling down ...Some will be in construction clothes ... Others, in softball or baseball uniforms ... It will be, as Hillary recently mocked, like the heavens opening up ... Woman, not throwing the kitchen sink at Obama, but woman who design kitchen sinks .. Woman who install kitchen sinks ... All these people - woman - marching for Hillary ... Coming to save Hillary ...

A pox on Charlotte Allen ... And, oh, those dastardly editors at The Washington Post ...

Springing this kind of Obama attack, less than 100-hours before the big voting day of March 4th.

Are they breaking the unwritten rule?

They know, its supposed to be all-glowing coverage for Obama, and scraps-and-dirges for Hillary.

And they come out with this, what do we want to call it, this Hillary Manifesto, at this late stage ... Yes, Allen and The Washington Post has thrown in their lot with the Freakshow ... They want a Hillary-McCain finale ... Their in league with McCain and the RNC ...

Maybe the WaPo just wants Hillary in the general election, to drive thousands-and-thousands to their archives, to read all the old 1990's stuff ... The RNC doesn't have to spend money, setting up Swift Boat fronts, or making videos ... The Freakshow will just say that "you can look it up in The Washington Post" and bingo, smear city all over again.

Yes, it's a risk, a gamble, to go out on the limb of insulting, not just woman but ... Well, nearly every rational, thinking person out there.

I mean, if this isn't some grand scheme to aid Hillary, and push her over the hump to beat Obama ...

Then WTF!


All I can say is that Charlotte Allen, and The Washington Post, made Ed Anger, from the 'World Weekly News', a very happy man...

They validated his entire career today.


SNL - We Had To Endure Hillary, But Then Came The Obama Files


Last evening, on 'Saturday Night Live' they, yes, surprise, opened with another Hillary-Obama debate sketch.


This was followed by an "Editorial Response" from the 3AM Gal herself; After a rather stilted minute or so, bantering with similar-clothed Amy Poehler, she got to shout out the trademark opening phrase.

(Okay, they had to play on the volcanic publicity generated from the first skit last week, but it's now time to move on.)

What did work, and was hysterically funny, was Robert Smigel's TV Funhouse cartoon, 'The Obama Files'

In it, he has Obama distancing himself away from Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, sending them off on study missions to non-existent countries, and more ...

It is raucously funny and The Raw Story has the video of it (it has already been removed for YouTube).

Check it out!

SNL TV FUNHOUSE CARTOON: The Obama Files


(If it ends up not there, you can go to the SNL site here to view it)


Bonus Links

Lynn Sweet: Clinton, Giuliani, surprise Saturday Night Live gig. Wicked SNL cartoon on Obama sidetracking Sharpton, Jackson. VIDEO

The Huffington Post: Live, From New York...It's Hillary Clinton!

Crooks and Liars - SNL: Live, From New York…It’s Hillary Clinton! Rudy shows up too

Patrick Healy/The Caucus: Clinton and Giuliani, Live From New York









This Date ... On The Garlic


Garlic History - On This Day


2 March 2007... On The Garlic

Top Ten Cloves: Reasons Rick Santorum Is Joining Fox News


2 March 2006... On The Garlic

Top Ten Cloves: Ways White House Will Try To Do Damage Control On Hurricane Video


2 March 2005... On The Garlic

Fiorina, Wolfowitz Head List For World Bank

Day Three of Swank Thank You's; No End In Sight

Nader In Early Lobby To Take Pope's Seat

Top Ten Cloves: Reasons CBS Colleagues Don't Watch Dan Rather