Monday, September 25, 2006

Garlic Exclusive - Torture Compromise Follow-Up: Special Song Given To Cheer Bush Up

My Favorite War

Early last week, when it appeared that President Bush would likely lose his battle to have the ability to continue to torture suspected terrorists and enemy combatants, Bill, Rich and all the frisky neocon scamps over at the PNAC had a special song commissioned and sent over to the White House, to bolster the President spirits and urge him not to give the fight.

Sources close to the White House tell The Garlic that, after receiving the gift song, the President added to his iPod and listened to it endlessly, over and over. Aides say he was singing it before too long, as he went about his business in the Oval Office and West Wing. On a few occasions, the President had it blasted over the sound system in the White House, for all to hear and join him in boisterously singing ‘My Favorite War’

(Sing along with The President, to the tune of ‘My Favorite Things’)

My Favorite War

Bombs drop on Baghdad
Burn the whiskers off kittens
Bright copper missiles
Maybe ours, Maybe Britain’s
Bright bullets fired
That tear and that gore
These are the things of my favorite war
. . .

Cream colored Humvees
Insurgents by the oodles
Terror cells meet Army shells
That turns them to noodles
CIA prisons with waterboards we adore
These are the things of my favorite war
. . .

Girls in white burkas
With blood-stained sashes
Human ash flakes that stay on their nose and eyelashes
Molting white fire
That melts the iron door
These are the things of my favorite war
. . .

When the Army fights
When the public opinion polls swing
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite war,
And then I don't feel so bad . . .

Bombs … Burning kittens
Copper Missiles … History rewritten
La dee da, la dee da,
La dee da, da,
These are the things of my favorite war
. . .

When the Army fights
When the public opinion polls swing
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite war,
And little by little my heavy heart soars . . .

And then I don't feel so bad . . .

Other Tunes Heard In The White House

It’s A Fascist World After All

I'm The Decider

The Anti-Iran War Anthem?

Never Can Say Dubai

I Shot The Hunter (But I Didn’t Shoot No Deputy)

Dick, The Magic Vice Prez

















President Bush, listening 'My Favorite War', on his iPod, a gift song from the folks over at the PNAC to lift his spirits during the Torture Debate last week

1 comment:

Garlic Fan in NJ said...

Hysterical!