Saturday, January 26, 2008

Na-Na, Na-Na-Na ... Obama Wins ... And Gets The Keys To Camelot!


Such restraint!


It took both CNN, and MSNBC, about three-seconds past the clock striking 7:00PM for them to declare Senator Barack Obama the winner of the South Carolina primary tonight.

And then, it only took the MSM (the gaggle of talking heads on MSNBC, who I stuck with, drifting in-and-out of naps) a few seconds after that, to start giving The Team Clinton their excuse - for getting their asses kicked;

They'll blow off South Carolina as inconsequential, an exhibition game.

The count has been fairly consistent throughout the evening, with Obama winning by nearly a 2-1 margin.

Exit polls, according to CNN, suggest it was the "Bill Clinton Effect";

"Roughly 6 in 10 South Carolina Democratic primary voters said Bill Clinton's campaigning was important in how they ultimately decided to vote, and of those voters, 48 percent went for Barack Obama while only 37 percent went for Hillary Clinton. Fourteen percent of those voters voted for John Edwards."
It is almost fully laughable at this point.

While Team Clinton Member Bill protests that he is only playing hardball politics, and not injecting the race card into the campaign (here, it's that moose-in-heat thing we talked about the other day), he goes and injects race into an answer of a question that wasn't asked today;
A number of prominent Barack Obama supporters and neutral observers have criticized Clinton’s vocal role on his wife’s behalf. John Kerry told National Journal that “being an ex-president does not give you license to abuse the truth.”

“Did you notice he didn’t specify?” Clinton said when asked about the comment. “They never do. They hurl these charges, but nothing gets specified. I'm not taking the bait today. I did what I could to help Senator Kerry every time he needed me, and every time he asked me. He can support whomever he wants for whatever reason he wants. But there's nothing for me to respond to.”

Another reporter asked what it said about Obama that it “took two people to beat him.” Clinton again passed. “That’s’ just bait, too. Jesse Jackson won South Carolina twice, in '84 and '88. And he ran a good campaign. Senator Obama's run a good campaign here, he’s run a good campaign everywhere.”
(Here's the video of it)

Note to reporter - Barack Obama is black and is running as the black candidate, so that means South Carolina is inconsequential, an exhibition game.

Poor Chelsea Clinton

And, if Team Clinton (both members, Hillary and Bill) are already pissed off enough that Obama dare interrupt her run to history, they must be setting off the hotel's sprinkler system this evening, with the late edition of The New York Times hitting the streets.

A President Like My Father

Sunday's NYT will be carrying the Op-Ed of Caroline Kennedy, endorsing ... Drumroll, please ... Barack Obama.
OVER the years, I’ve been deeply moved by the people who’ve told me they wished they could feel inspired and hopeful about America the way people did when my father was president. This sense is even more profound today. That is why I am supporting a presidential candidate in the Democratic primaries, Barack Obama.

My reasons are patriotic, political and personal, and the three are intertwined. All my life, people have told me that my father changed their lives, that they got involved in public service or politics because he asked them to. And the generation he inspired has passed that spirit on to its children. I meet young people who were born long after John F. Kennedy was president, yet who ask me how to live out his ideals."
Now, ordinarily, such endorsements may make a splash for a few hours, they get boilerplated in the campaigns' DNA press releases, and that's about it.

But this is Caroline Kennedy, and hundreds-of thousands of people tomorrow, when the see and read this Obama-endorsing Op-Ed, this is what will also come into their minds view;













Obama has, more-or-less officially, been handed the torch, and the keys to Camelot

And that means trouble for Team Clinton.

Along with keeping their steady hum of race baiting along the campaign trail, they'll have to add on some Kennedy bashing now.

Geesh! ... Just can't catch a break ...

Bonus Links

Robin Koerner: America’s new three little words: YES WE CAN

Pams House Blend: Obama wins - The "first black president" flushed his wife's support from blacks down the toilet

Bob Herbert: Questions for the Clintons

Jonathan Chait: Is the right right on the Clintons? Hillary's campaign tactics are causing some liberals to turn against the couple.

Nicole Belle: Forget Super Tuesday Or Even Tsunami Tuesday, It’s All About The Super-Delegates

Go to Memeorandum to get the latest headlines


Friday, January 25, 2008

Does He Get A New Girlfriend With This Job Too? ... Does The Job "Pay For Itself?


Maybe it's the clarion call of his old colleague, Donald Rumsfeld, that tugs at his heartstrings of public service.


Wolfowitz Returns to U.S. Government as Adviser

As we said when the job offer was reported in December, the board meets quarterly to provide advice to the secretary of state and one of her deputies based on classified intelligence on some of the most important issues in United States foreign policy today, from Iran to North Korea."
Egad!

The Wolf Man, back, prowling the corridors of State.

Hmmm, Rumsfeld calling for a new Propaganda Agency... Wolfowitz, back at the State Department, advising, among other things, on Iran ...

Do we smell a build-up here? ... Get the old team together, for the final run down the stretch, putting their considerable prevarication skills to use for a push into Iran?

Does the girlfriend get a gig too?

Are we gearing up to go after the Filipino Monkey?

Will we soon here the rhetoric, from the Wolf Man, or, perhaps the Madam Secretary herself, that a preemptive, offensive entry into Iran will "pay for itself"?

From The Lede, back in December;
"Another official called the reported appointment “amazing.” That comment alluded to Mr. Wolfowitz’s staunch support for the Iraq War when he was deputy secretary of defense under President George W. Bush. He hasn’t won much good will since then, either during a relatively quick rise and fall as World Bank president, or in his current post at a conservative think tank in Washington.

But if nothing else, Mr. Wolfowitz really needs no introduction, especially to his detractors on the blogs, who are a puzzled, angry lot today:

The Next Hurrah: “Condi, is it a coincidence that so many people responsible for gaming the intelligence to get us into Iraq are on your advisory board?”

The Brad Blog: “In Bushworld, incompetence must be rewarded.”

Arms Control Wonk: “Andrew Sullivan has a better line than I can muster.”

Andrew Sullivan: “He’s advising Condi on WMDs. Curveball wasn’t available?”

So far, The Lede has not turned up any bloggers weighing in to support Mr. Wolfowitz."
On the downside, with the protracted, ugly, almost never-ending saga of his resignation from The World Bank, will the next President be able to get him out of this position?

Stay tuned Wolf Fans, this one is surely to be a ever-giving gift!


Bonus Wolfie Whoppers

Yes, Wolfie, People Will Be Talking, For Years, About You ... The Results - The Garlic Weekly Poll

Larisa Alexandrovna - Scott Ritter: Neocons as Parasites

"Hillary 1984" Video Blogger Takes On Wolfowitz

Andrew Cockburn: The Puppet Who Cleared the Way for Iraq's Destruction

Developing Story! White House Giving World Bank, Wolfowitz Green Light To Blame McNulty; New Strategy Of Leveraging Scandals; Cheney Says Embattled Hero "Definitely In Final Throes" At World Bank















Yeah, it's a head-scratcher to us, too, Wolfie ...

Wanted Dead Or ... Ahh, The Hell With It .. I'll Let The Next President Get'em ...


Maybe, instead of having him classified as a terrorist, the FBI's #1 Wanted Man, The Commander Guy can call Osama bin Laden a tax cut, that way, he'll be motivated, like all-get-out, to see that the mission gets accomplished.


Not exactly a head-shaker, being his consistent detachment, his always-growing disinterest in capturing Osama bin Laden, going back to, well, first, the left turn he took out of Afghanistan to attack and occupy Iraq, his closing the CIA office that was after the #1 terrorist, his admission that Bid Laden's capture wasn't a "top priority", and now, to this;

Bush: Bin Laden Will Be ‘Gotten By A President’ (But Probably Not This One)

"It has been 2,326 days since 9/11, and the chief mastermind behind those attacks, Osama bin Laden, has not yet been captured. “If we could find the cave he is in, I promise you — he would be brought to justice or wherever he’s hiding,” President Bush tells Fox News in “George W. Bush: Fighting to the Finish,” a documentary scheduled to air Sunday night. Fox reports:

Bush says in the interview he’s confident bin Laden ultimately will be found.

“He’ll be gotten by a president,” Bush says.

And to critics who say he hasn’t done enough to find bin Laden, Bush is blunt:

“They don’t know what they’re talking about,” he says."
And neither does he!

Now, this isn't to be confused, with the profound and proficient Lying Operation that has been conducted.

When it came to fearmongering, or scoring political points for a political victory, The Commander Guy didn't shy away from putting on his ten-gallon hat and six-shooter and he, and his henchmen and woman, attempting to scare the bejeezes out of everyone, that Bin Laden and/or other terrorists were going to pop out of your closet.

In fact, the Bush Grindhouse continually inflated the size and importance of Al Qaeda in Iraq, whenever it deemed to serve their talking points.

Keith Olbermann pointed out the Wednesday evening, the Center for Public Integrity report on the lying of the Bush Grindhouse, noted the spikes in the number of lies, based on the calendar of political events, and/or Grindhouse scandals

Opening the segment, a wry observation;
OLBERMANN: If you have ever said this administration lied to us 1,000 times about the Iraq, the war and al Qaeda, it turns out you owe Mr. Bush an apology. In our third story tonight, a new study confirming the administration only lied about those vital matters 935 times.
Then, with Rachel Maddow, of Air America, and a newly-anointed MSNBC political pundit;
OLBERMANN: Only 935. In gambling terms the under won. Who knew?

MADDOW: Looking back, before today, before we had a bullion keyword searchable database of lies about to lead up to the Iraq War. You had the sense that we were lied to a lot about weapons of mass destruction, about Saddam having links to al Qaeda and to 9/11.

But having all of these instances in a list now, literally in a searchable database of lies kind of plugs up the memory hole in a way.

It means that we have the evidence at hand to rebut the assertion every time somebody asserts that oh the intelligence was a little fuzzy or I never made that sort of claims, 935 lies may feel low or they may feel high, but they are all provable, documents lies that can‘t disappear again that can‘t disappear in a public record or down the memory hole.

OLBERMANN: So that‘s 532 occasions so it‘s basically a two to one ratio to lies to opportunities for lies. It‘s kind of spectacular in its own way.

MADDOW: Compound sentences is what I think that means.

OLBERMANN: The center did not include false implications. Indirect follow-ups like Iraq has dangerous weapons. Or Iran has dangerous weapons, for that matter. The Republican echoing, actual other Republicans outside the administration saying the same things. We‘ve got all the senators and congressmen are not included in this list. Fox News chicken little moments are not included in this. But what base is there for claiming that this was planned deceit as opposed to innocent, albeit voluminous incompetence?

MADDOW: Well, I spoke with the director of the Center for Public Integrity about that fact today. I said how do you get from there were a lot of lies to the lies were plants. He said one of the things that they found was they organized this information was that there were these really noticeable quantitative spikes in the number of lies being told. At certain times they were lying a lot faster than other times. For example in the lead-up for the Congressional authorization, midterm elections. At specific politically moments, the lies got faster.

There is no way to explain that unless they were lying to accomplish the political objective
Much like the 160,000+ troops in Iraq that he will dump on the next President, The Commander Guy will exit the Grindhouse, an utter failure in HIS War on Terror, leaving the Osama bin Laden problem as well.

After all, The Commander Guy closed the CIA office in charge of hunting bin Laden (which he, a few days later, attempted to deny), then, a few months later, telling rightwing pundit Fred Barnes "Bin Laden Is Not A Top Priority Use of American Resources".

This, after his chicken-heart, phony bravado, following the attacks of September 11th, with his swaggering "I want justice," Bush said. "And there's an old poster out West… I recall, that said, 'Wanted, Dead or Alive.'"

Hmmm ... I wonder, have they raised enough funds, for the Bush Presidential Library, to have a wing of it house all the lies? Or, is that question, about where to house his lies and his Presidential Library, a redundant one?


The Commander Guy's Legacy

Bush uses bin Laden to defend Iraq war policy

Digby: Hyping the intelligence again?

Juan Cole: Bush's incompetence gives al-Qaida new life; The White House hints at military action as the terror organization regroups in northern Pakistan and the Musharraf government begins to wobble.

Sidney Blumenthal: Cooking the intelligence, again; The latest government estimate of the terrorist threat is just a rehash of the same old script, produced under pressure to support the president's efforts to sell the Iraq war.

Why the Bush Administration Didn't Care About Al Qaeda


An empty bullhorn

Good Post Alert - Martin Lewis's "Ads The GOP Would Run Against Obama - #1 "Ooops!"


Not only was it bound to happen, but, surely, if he does go on to win the nomination, you can, pretty safely, bet that the RNC/GOP Smear Machine will be all over this.


Headline from the Los Angeles Times yesterday;

Obama said oops on 6 state Senate votes; He pushed the wrong button, he asserted at the time. Two of the admitted flubs were on hotly contested issues.

Barack Obama angered fellow Democrats in the Illinois Senate when he voted to strip millions of dollars from a child welfare office on Chicago's West Side. But Obama had a ready explanation: He goofed.

"I was not aware that I had voted no," he said that day in June 2002, asking that the record be changed to reflect that he "intended to vote yes."
Hmmm ... Do the Illinois lawmakers need some kind of Occupational Therapy? ... Lessons in pushing buttons?
"The rules allow state lawmakers to clear up a mishap if they suffered from a momentary case of stumbly fingers or a lapse in attention. Correcting the record is common practice in the Illinois Legislature, where lawmakers routinely cast numerous votes in a hurry.

But some lawmakers say the practice also offers a relatively painless way to placate both sides of a difficult issue. Even if a lawmaker admits an error, the actual vote stands and the official record merely shows the senator's "intent."
Maybe, they should adopt some baseball in the Illinois legislature, and bring in a few "designated button-pushers"

Anywho ...

Writer/Producer/Satirist and, self-described "The World’s LEAST-Reserved Englishman", Martin Lewis, has beaten them to the punch.

Check out "Ads The GOP Would Run Against Obama - #1 "Ooops!"



More Martin Lewis Riffs

Martin Lewis Website

Martin Lewis: Give Karl Rove The Ultimate Gift!

"Let's Twist Again": Right-wing Bloggers Smear HuffPost

Defending Martin Lewis ... It's Satire, Stupid!

Bush Meets Monty Python!

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Leave It to Rumsfeld ... There's Not Enough Lying Going On!


What cosmic forces came together, what asteroid-sized dice rolled a seven, to have former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld come out - the day a quantified and detailed report was released (and with a searchable database) on laying out the Bush Grindhouse's documented lying - and make a call for a new, U.S. Propaganda Agency, ostensibly, to win the hearts and minds of people who, presently, don't like us very much?


You can't just let stuff happen, you have to make stuff happen.

From Wired's "Rummy Resurfaces, Calls for U.S. Propaganda Agency";

Private media does not get up in the morning and say what can we do to promote the values and ideas that the free Western nations believe in? It gets up in the morning and says they're going to try to make money by selling whatever they sell... The way they decided to do that is to be dramatic and if it bleeds it leads is the common statement in the media today. They've got their job, and they have to do that, and that's what they do.

We need someone in the United States government, some entity, not like the old USIA . . . I think this agency, a new agency has to be something that would take advantage of the wonderful opportunities that exist today. There are multiple channels for information . . . The Internet is there, pods are there, talk radio is there, e-mails are there. There are all kinds of opportunities. We do not with any systematic organized way attempt to engage the battle of ideas and talk about the idea of beheading, and what's it's about and what it means. And talk about the fact that people are killing more Muslims than they are non-Muslims, these extremists. They're doing it with suicide bombs and the like. We need to engage and not simply be passive and allow that battle of competition of ideas."
Notice how effortlessly, how easy, how endemic it is for these Neocons to include the fearmongering in their speech. Here, much like the continuous thread of the Bush Grindhouse, if we don't engage in a propaganda program, terrorists are going to come and kills us.

Ol' Snowflakes doesn't, necessarily, distinguish how this will be different, from the propaganda machine he manned from the Pentagon during his reign of terror ... Or, how it is different from the on-going operation out of the Bush Grindhouse

Rumsfeld was one of the featured speakers yesterday, at the Network Centric Warfare 2008, sponsored by a handful of mega-corporations, many, no doubt, that have a vested interest in ramping up the warfare propaganda, the better to curry fat contracts if the volume is amped up.

I'm sure, the shadow, play government that he and fellow weekend warrior, Vice President Dick Cheney, operate already have a fully-functional Propaganda Agency up-and-running, no doubt, capable of seamlessly turning into our official, working Propaganda Agency.

So many logistics to work out.

Would this compete with, or augment, the White House Iraq Group (WHIG) and White House Iraq and Iran Group (WHIIG)?

When will this be launched - August is out, per the razor-sharp thinking of Andy Card?

Hmmm ... Maybe Rumsfeld's wishful, and wistful, statement, is a ruse? Maybe it's already in action and Rumsfeld is just out there to throw people off the scent?

This project, shamelessly, but certainly, could be something that would come out of a Rumsfeld-styled propaganda agency

Sigh ... You know what they say ... You have to go to war with the propaganda you have, not the propaganda you might want or wish to have at a later time ...


Bonus Rumsfeld Ramblings

Rumsfeld Blames Contractor, If Media Plant Stories True, But Defends Outsourcing Program; Says "Still Gathering Facts"; If It Turns Out Positive, Will Be Adopted Into New 'National Victory Strategy' Plan

“They’re coming here for the American experience”; Rumsfeld Weighs In On Immigration Battle; Won’t Tie It To War With Iran Suggests Army Recruiting Woes Could Be Solved With Mandatory Service By Illegal Aliens

Top Ten Cloves: What Would Be Different If Rumsfeld Was A Dog, But Still Secretary of Defense

"They Don't Like Me! ... They Really Don't Like Me! ...


No, I don't expect we'll hear Make-Up Mitt Romney squeal like Sally Fields, but the word is out that he is, pretty much, despised by his fellow Republican candidates.


The NYT today, in their account, "Romney Leads in Ill Will Among G.O.P. Candidates", lays it out;

"Never get into a wrestling match with a pig,” Senator John McCain said in New Hampshire this month after reporters asked him about Mr. Romney. “You both get dirty, and the pig likes it.”
That it might make Make-Up Mitt rap again, breaking into an improvised "Who Let The Pigs Out - Oink Oink", remains to be seen, and, the timing of this article should make for an interesting sidebar, in tonight's GOP Florida Debate (with the dreadful duo of Little Timmy Russert and Brian Williams moderating once again).

With Rudy911 slipping into oblivion, he may be the only one that will suck up to Make-Up Mitt, if the others, openly, show their dislike and contempt for him.

Mustang Bobby, over on Shakespeare's Sister, doesn't see McCain offering any platitudes;
"It must be especially galling to John McCain who went through the 2000 primary against just such an opponent, got his head handed to him by Karl Rove, and paid his dues by sucking up to Bush and Company over the last eight years, leaving him with the feeling that if anyone is entitled to be the next Republican president, it should be him. Then in walks this matinée idol with a political pedigree and the same simplistic nostrums about a CEO presidency and "Washington is broken" that worked so well for the last guy, and the GOP voters are eating it up. No wonder McCain's pissed."

And Steve Benen, from The Carpetbagger Report, nails it with his "Mitt Romney and the Eddie Haskell Phenomenon";
"For practically an entire year now, the various campaigns have gone up and down, but in every instance, there was Romney, in their face and presenting himself to voters like an ingratiating, toadying Eddie Haskell."
You can almost bet, Make-Up Mitt will keep smiling through it, but, if they do gang up on him, let's hope, for the Mittster's sake, he doesn't get rattled, go into Robo-Mitt mode, and, an attempt to pander to the Floridians, saying something like he saw his father march with Anita Bryant, or worse, Castro, alienating the Cuban GOP.

He does have a track record of getting flustered and flubbing his lines in debates.


More Madcap Make-Up Mitt

Romney Speech: Where's Leonard Pinth Garnell When You Really Need Him?

This Just In! Romney Backs McCain In Wanting To "Shoot Obama"; Says Consulted Sons About Using Deadly Force; Hopes Opportunity Comes Before Primaries

Top Ten Cloves: Things About Mitt Romney's Announcement To Run For President















Top Ten Cloves: Other Things President Bush Wants To Put In The Economic Stimulus Package


News Item: Tentative Deal Reached on Economic Stimulus Package; Most Workers Would Receive at Least $300 Tax Rebate


10. Autographed pictures, of him, in his flightsuit

9. Even though it has nothing to do with Sept. 11th, a proclamation, urging everyone to "Go Shopping!"

8. Immunity for the Telecommunications companies, just in case the Democrats don't cave on the FISA Bill

7. An advertising insert, when the $300 Rebate checks are mailed, asking for it to be donated to his Presidential Library

6. New law, banning anyone receiving a Rebate check from donating it to Americans United for Change, and their anti-Bush campaign

5. An Amazon Kindle, so everyone can download his "Ek-A-Lec-Tic" Reading List

4. An RFP, seeking anyone that can help them find the missing White House emails

3. Sneak in an amendment, that will stimulate, at least, one person - Scooter Libby's Pardon

2. Stipulation, that Rebates paid out in those New Bush Coins

1. A Signing Statement, banning the word "Recession", backed by heavy fines and jail time


Bonus "It's Not A Recession" Recession Articles

Robert B. Reich: The politics of an economic nightmare; No U.S. leader wants to admit how bad the damage may get from the one-two punch of the credit crunch and housing slump

Goldman Sachs sees recession in 2008

Paul Krugman: Stimulus disappointment

Danny Schechter: Subprime or Subcrime? Time To Investigate and Prosecute

Kevin A. Hassett: 5 Myths About That Depressing R-Word


Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Keith Olbermann ... Setting The Standard That, Almost Guaranteed, Will Not Be Followed


Yes, I'm going a bit late to this (in part, waiting, and waiting, for MSNBC to publish the damn transcript) but it is a story that has gone vastly under-reported.


A major news anchor made an error, a mistake and then, didn't gloss over it, didn't blame anyone else ... And, in both print, and on-air, brought attention to his mistake, accepted the responsibility for it, and apologized for it ...

Yes, the man, Keith Olbermann, host of MSNBC's Countdown, called himself out.

The issue stemmed from an interview Olbermann conducted with Lawrence O'Donnell, on Thursday, 17 January, in which there was no mention or reference to O'Donnell's lowdown smear of John Edwards, in a post he wrote on Huffington Post, the week before.

At some point, between the end of Countdown on Thursday evening, and before 11AM the next day, Olbermann did get hip to it and posted an admission of his error on the Daily Kos, announcing at the very end that "It will be addressed tonight on the show."

Addressed indeed.

Just before the first commercial break, on the Friday 18 January broadcast of Countdown;

"And a note about last night‘s COUNTDOWN and the discussion of Barack Obama‘s evoking of the name Ronald Reagan as a president of change. Lawrence O‘Donnell of Huffingtonpost.com was our guest in the 6th sentence of his first answer, Lawrence dismissed criticism of Obama about for the Reagan reference by John Edwards and that said, Edwards, quote, “Is not a factor in these races coming up except possibly Nevada.” He was entitled to say that but I should have pointed out to you that a week ago, Mr. O‘Donnell wrote a piece for “Huffington” in which he called Edwards, a quote, “Loser,” who, quote, “Might in the end become nothing other than the southern white man who stood in the way of the black man.” I would have pointed out to you if he had pointed that out to us. We can‘t do on air vetting (ph) of everything, every analyst has ever written, the newscast would then consist of 58 minutes of that plus the theme music. But when it is relevant and it‘s pointed at recent it should happen, my apologies that in this case it did not."

Jeez, take just MSNBC, and NBC, let alone the rest of the MSM (The NYT would have to publish months of editions to cover Michael Gordon's stenography), if they applied this standard to Little Timmy Russert, and Tweety Chris Matthews, they'd have to launch another channel (and Tweety was recently forced to apologize, on-air)


Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Ring A Bell Today For John Edwards ... Let's Give Him Some Wings To Carry On Good Fight With ...

"Well, I've said too much. I . . . You're the Board here. You do what you want with this thing. Just one thing more, though. This town needs this measly one-horse institution if only to have some place where people can come without crawling to Potter ... "

Boy, it we want to run with a "It's A Wonderful Life" theme today, with John Edwards starring as George Bailey, we have to do some serious script doctoring.

We will need to write in two Mr. Potters!

I tuned in for a debate last evening and all I got was this lousy car wreck.

It was "Rock'em-Sock'em" robots last evening, in South Carolina, during the CNN Democratic Debate, and the Rock'em-Sock'em robot with HRC on her warm-up cape clearly got the shot on the jaw that had the other Rock'em-Sock'em robot's head shoot off its' shoulders.

And Obama's people may have some trouble pushing that head back down, to keep on fighting (or, better said, to begin raising his ire, as well as his political fists)


















Someone needs to sit down Barack Obama and explain that he's in a presidential campaign - and he is, presently, running against The CLINTONS (and yes, both of them).

Someone needs to explain that he only won the Iowa Caucus, not anything else, so the construction plans for that new, Utopian political landscape have to be kept on hold.

That someone needs to say again - and really accentuate - that he is running against THE CLINTONS!

Hunter S. Thompson, in his laser beam, spot-on "Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail", about his view of the 1972 Presidential elections described the ego of a man running for president to that of "a moose in heat".

Well, there's two moose out there, ramming their antlers against anybody and anything that looks to be in their way on calling 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue home again.

And, in this rewrite of 'Wonderful Life', we have to flash way forward, and bring in a denizen of the future, something no one would ever dream to set foot in Bedford Falls.

For, it hasn't taken long in this campaign season for Hillary to reveal herself ... She tried the weepy thing in New Hampshire, and, for whatever gains that got her, it's not the right fit

Much like one of those machines in the Terminator movies, her skin started melting off last evening, revealing the steel frame, the death-focused machine, pounding, relentlessly on Obama, on his Illinois "present" voting record, his connections to a Chicago slum landlord, his (and still unbelievably) embrace of the late Gipper, Ronald Reagan.

And, clearly, almost tauntingly, defending her husband's spirited entry into the primaries, giving no indication that she plans to call him off (despite the DNC calls to play nice and have Bill go off and act like one of those lame presidents from that dreadful movie "My Fellow Americans").

Again, someone mention to Obama that he is running against THE CLINTONS!

They don't run away from blood, they look to draw it out ... They thrive on it ... They wade in it, take showers with it ... Drink it, so they can go out on the campaign trail and get some more ...

This isn't work for the Clintons, this is fun ... This is relaxing to them, as comfortable as sitting in a big, leather Barker Lounger on a lazy afternoon ... Forget gardening, or Sudoku, just give'em a political office to run for ...

And the more Obama whines about it, the more they will hit him ... And hit him ... And hit him ...

Hillary, from the beginning, has looked at the Democratic nomination and, eventually, winning the general election, as her entitlement, not a process she would actually have to work to attain.

So, that alone, has the Clinton's pissed off.

But Obama is a gamer, and in marching forward, singing about his own destiny to the White House, he goes and panders in Nevada, perhaps talking loudly so as to be overheard in neighboring California, reaching out to, maybe, pick-up a few independents and left-leaning Republicans, stomping on the Clinton Legacy, blowing kisses towards Reagan.

That bought Obama nothing but bringing a red-faced, steam-coming-out-of-his-ears, husband Bill into the mix, and, with the success they have had, he's in it to stay (and, if you want to see just how The Clintons outflanked and kicked Obama's ass in Las Vegas, you need to read Al Giordano's "Nevada: What Really Happened at the At-Large Caucuses?")

This goes all the way through Super-Duper Tuesday and into the convention.

If Obama doesn't know by now, that he is in a scratch-your-eyes-out fight, just follow the trail of his blood all the way to Denver, where Bill and Hillary will be waiting for him, fingers and lips stained red, looking for more.

John Who?

So, where does that leave our guy John Edwards, that "one-horse institution" of this years campaign?

The MSM has written him off (and last Friday, the Edwards' team released a most amusing video on it), Lawrence O'Donnell has done a smear job on him and all the pundits, when they do the election math, there's no slide rule calculations for Edwards sitting on the table, at least, none with his name on it.

With the historic opportunity to elect the first woman, or first black, to the office of the President, it certainly doesn't bode well for Edwards.

Despite the above-referenced battle being waged between Obama and THE CLINTONS, it's far to big, to far up the ladder, for Edwards to sneak in there - unless, miraculously, an unprecedented, Howard-Dean-Ned-Lamont-stars-aligning-just-at-the-right-time grassroots movement rises up, takes over the process and writes its' own, dynamic history.

I don't know about Obama, but I feel certain, The Clinton Machine won't allow that to happen.

However, if such a star-aligning movement wants something to put a stake-in-the-ground with, they got that today.

In an extraordinary letter, Martin Luther King III has urged John Edwards to stay in the race and carry on the legacy of his father;
"…I appreciate that on the major issues of health care, the environment, and the economy, you have framed the issues for what they are - a struggle for justice. And, you have almost single-handedly made poverty an issue in this election.

...So, I urge you: keep going. Ignore the pundits, who think this is a horserace, not a fight for justice. My dad was a fighter. As a friend and a believer in my father's words that injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere, I say to you: keep going. Keep fighting. My father would be proud."
(You can read the full text of the letter here)

If you didn't have the jarring foghorn, that raging conflagration of the Obama-Clinton battle, King's letter to Edwards is nearly tear-inducing, painting just as good, if not better than the sketching of Obama, as to where the political debate should be - not about tearfully finding one's voice, or idol worship of the piece-of-you-know-what the 40th President of the country was.

So, to bring us back to our Edwards-as-George-Bailey theme, we turn to the under-the-weather daughter, Zuzu;
ZUZU: Look, Daddy. Teacher says, every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings.

GEORGE (smiling) That's right, that's right

Ring a bell today for John Edwards ... Ring a lot of bells, so he can grab a pair of wings, and, as he has done so far in the campaign, go way up there and align those stars himself, and carry on the good fight.

Oh... people will come Hillary ... People will most definitely come ... The Results - The Garlic's Weekly Poll


Well, if it plays out, as our Garlic Poll voters have stated, it's no big surprise that Bill Clinton is, and will be, so involved in Hillary's campaign ... He's ( or Terrell Owens) going to be needed to either translate Hillary's teary speeches, or he'll have to step up and take over the talking.


It must have been a very difficult, and frustrating time for Hillary Clinton.

Not finding her own voice until January 2008, after all those years as First Lady, in the White House ... Running her campaigns for U.S. Senator ... It, kind of, makes you think about what she could have accomplished, earlier in her career, if only she had her own voice back then.

Hmmm ... Was it the crisp, cold New Hampshire air that brought it out? ... Could be a boon to the state, a, sort of "Field of Voices" kind-of-thing ... "If you build it, they will talk" ... People will come from all over, driving for miles and miles, just for the opportunity to breath in that Granite State air and find their own voices ...

"Hillary, people will come Hillary. They'll come to New Hampshire for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for their own voices. Of course, we won't mind if you look around, you'll say. It's only $20 per person. They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and their own voices they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers; sit in winter coats on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the voting lines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the election and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces. People will come Hillary. The one constant through all the years, Hillary, has been elections. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But elections has marked the time. This field, this election: it's a part of our past, Hillary. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Hillary. People will most definitely come.

The Results - The Garlic's Weekly Poll January 14 - January 22, 2008

With Hillary Clinton "finding her own voice", we can expect ...

1. Entire stump speeches, crying and talking at the same time Tally 42%

2. She'll give up campaign to try out for American Idol, belting out patriotic tunes Tally 27%

3. It will come out she was the Filipino Monkey that threatened the Navy Tally 19%

4. Start taunting the other candidates, just like San Diego Charger QB Philip Rivers Tally 12%

This week’s Poll - Those missing White House emails ... Turns out that ...

Scroll up to the top right corner to place your vote


Monday, January 21, 2008

“Who Let The Dogs Out?” ... Mitt, Did You Check The Roof of The Car?


Who Let The Dogs Out?


God, it it moments like this, during campaigns, that really, despite whether you care for the candidate, or not, makes you feel embarrassed for them.

Time will tell if this was Willard M. Romney's "Dukakis-in-a-tank" moment, or John Kerry's windsurfing adventure (and, to keep it in this season, Mike Huckabee's "Elmer Fudd" hunting gear photo shoot)

But getting back to the man-for-all-positions (just not at the same time, or, necessarily, in order), we can stand down Leonard Pinth Garnell, regarding Make-Up Mitt's less-then-spirited foray into rap music today.

No doubt, Mr. Garnell would have had inveighed, with phrases such as "Astonishingly ill-chosen!", "Unrelentingly bad!" and, to wrap it up, "Really bit the big one!"

And, oh, the irony ...

Whatever possessed Make-Up Mitt to come up, in his MTV moment, with that song?

Oh all the songs ... Rap, Hip-Hop ... Show tunes ... Whatever, pick any genre ...

Who Let The Dogs Out?

From the man who strapped the family dog to the roof of the family car...

The incident: dog excrement found on the roof and windows of the Romney station wagon. How it got there: Romney strapped a dog carrier — with the family dog Seamus, an Irish Setter, in it — to the roof of the family station wagon for a twelve hour drive from Boston to Ontario, which the family apparently completed, despite Seamus's rather visceral protest.

Some days, this stuff just writes itself ...


Bonus Make-Up Mitt Woofs!

Watch the CBS News Video of Mitt and his Who Let The Dogs Out Moment

Who Let the Dogs out??- Baha men Original version

dday: Uptight White Guy Out Of His Element Alert

Breaking News! Romney On Debate Gaffe: "Meant To Say I Would Consult With My Sons"; Candidate Feverishly Works To Correct Impression; Campaign Said To Be Firing All Its' Lawyers

Is John Boehner Consulting The Romney Campaign, Giving Make-Up Mitt Crying Lessons?

Top Ten Cloves: Other People Mitt Romney Saw His Father With

















"I can sing "How Much Is That Doggie In The Window" instead, if you want ..."

Top Ten Cloves: Ways Chuck Norris Will Keep Mike Huckabee From Getting Old In The White House, If He's Elected


News Item - Norris: McCain may be too old for the White House


10. For anyone using Google to search "How old is President Mike Huckabee" or "Is President Mike Huckabee getting old", they don't get search results, they get an asskicking from Chuck Norris

9. Chuck Norris will veto any aging with his fists

8. When stress and pressure enter the Oval Office, they don't see President Mike Huckabee, they see Chuck Norris and get their asses kicked

7. Chuck Norris will stare down everyone, stare them down so hard, they get old while President Mike Huckabee stays young

6. The red, hot-line phone in the Oval Office will never ring and bother President Mike Huckabee ... World Leaders know, if they call, all they're going to get is a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris coming out of the receiver on their end

5. Fearful of what might happen, the hair on President Mike Huckabee's head will stay black, so they won't have to deal with Chuck Norris

4. Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick any part of the aging process that comes near President Mike Huckabee

3. No recycled air, or chance of crashing, President Mike Huckabee won't use Air Force One ... He'll fly on Chuck Norris

2. The candles on a President Mike Huckabee birthday cake will be so scared, seeing Chuck Norris there, they'll blow themselves out, wishing for President Mike Huckabee to stay young

1. If John McCain tries to send his 95-year-old mother over to wash Chuck Norris's mouth out with soap, he'll karate-kick the soap down her throat, and then go over to McCain and wash his mouth out with her roundhouse-kicked body


(H/T to Chuck Norris Facts, for the inspiration)


Sunday, January 20, 2008

Best-of-Day! ... Crimmins and Rich


The Garlic, ever endeavoring to bring you the best of the World Wide Web, is introducing with this post a new feature - Best of Day!


Be it a line, a headline, a passage, photo, etc, we will strive to bring it to you (which, as disclosure, will be based on available "bests", as well as our time, energy and reading/research).

It will be, as with other offerings (such as Good Post Alerts, or The Laura Bush Bummer Bombing-of-the Day Posts), from time-to-time, not an everyday-thing.

So, to kick it off, we turn to someone very familiar, and many times featured on the pages of The Garlic, satirist Barry Crimmins, who takes away the Best Line of the Day;

"Either Giuliani is waiting for the heat to blow over concerning numerous scandals that his felonious police commissioner, Bernard Kerik somehow neglected or Rudy is protesting the unfairness of his party's decision to hold all its primaries and caucuses on days other than September 11."

This comes from Crimmins' post today, "Crazy Dicks", which also offered another gem;
I can't do that because I understand a basic truth: he or she who wants to be in control is a dick and probably crazy. The premise behind most presidential bids is shockingly simple: I've looked at the entire world and there is one glaring problem-- I'm not in charge!"

And it's a day of riches (pun intended), as NYT columnist Frank Rich rings in with the Headline of the Day;

Ronald Reagan Is Still Dead

We can only hope - fervently - that the Writer's Strike ends at the soonest, and SNL gets back on the air.

What could be a better nod to their illustrious early, great years, then to lead off Weekend Update with Seth Meyers, excitedly exclaiming "President Ronald Reagan is still dead!"