Rumsfeld Goes With The Lies He Wish He Had

Who knew!

Lenny Bruce used to do a bit where he offered this advice;

"Whatever happens, deny it. Flat-out deny it! If you really love your wife, deny it. If they walk in on you, deny it. Even if they got pictures, deny it. Even if she catches you with a chicken, deny it."

I just can't picture Old Snowflakes being into Bruce, so he must have just taken his own advice and said "You go to write a book with the lies you have---not the lies you might want or wish to have at a later time."

Yes, yet another of the Bush Grindhouse, one of their most prolific warmongers, has penned a "Not Me, Not My Fault" book, hitting the streets this week.

UGH!

From the NYT;

“Two weeks after the worst terrorist attack in our nation’s history, those of us in the Department of Defense were fully occupied,” Mr. Rumsfeld recalls. But the president insisted on new military plans for Iraq, Mr. Rumsfeld writes. “He wanted the options to be ‘creative.’ ”

[snip]

His biggest mistake, Mr. Rumsfeld writes, was in not forcing Mr. Bush to accept his offers to resign after the abuse of Iraqi detainees by American military jailers came to light in early 2004. Mr. Rumsfeld insists that the abuses were the actions of rogue soldiers and that they did not reflect any approved policies, but nevertheless he offered to step down.

[snip]

While generally defending the Bush administration’s counterterrorism legal policies, Mr. Rumsfeld expresses some regrets. He suggests several times that some criticism and setbacks could have been avoided if the administration had gone to Congress for legislation authorizing the policies instead of relying on the president’s war powers.

"Oh, if we only didn't didn't have contempt and scorn for our critics (you know, the "Appeaserrs ... the morally and intellectually confused" ), and only if we didn't piss on the Constitution and make up our own laws, maybe things would have turned out better."

Will Bunch, over on his Attytood doesn't mince words;

Heh, that's funny. Of course, since there were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq and in fact there apparentrly had not been any for a number of years, the reason that Rumsfeld would like to take "that one" back is because he was lying. Maybe someday someone will free the Washington Post from the tyranny of the inverted pyramid and they can actually say that.

Donald Rumsfeld lied.

Jack Stuef, over on Wonkette weighed in as well;

America’s Grandpa of Death Donald Rumsfeld is having his memoir published on Tuesday, serving as an addendum to George W. Bush’s book in that it has actual, alleged facts, opinions, and memories in it. So: Abu Ghraib? Not his fault, but he really wanted to resign over it and feels very emo that big meanie Bush wouldn’t let him. Initial troop levels? Not his fault, nobody in the military ever asked him for more troops. Guantanamo? Not his fault the jail existed, and actually he made sure there was less torture and fewer prisoners. Hmm, anything we’re forgetting here? Oh, that one war. What was it called again? Anyway, not his fault, Bush came to him about Iraq before the U.S. even invaded Afghanistan, but at the same meeting, he also talked about Rummy’s son’s drug addiction, so all Rummy could do was cry about that. Whoops!

And this;

Ah, there you have it. Rumsfeld could have said, “What the fuck are you talking about going to war with Iraq for? Our country was just attacked by a foreign terrorist organization we need to go try to destroy. Iraq has nothing to do with this. Aren’t you more concerned with winning this war we haven’t even begun yet?” But instead, his son had done some drugs. Sure thing, Rumsfeld. Perfectly good excuse. You should drop some leaflets on the families of people, American and Iraqi, whose children have died in that war. “Sorry, my son was doing drugs. I was emotional at the time. Not my fault.”

Stuef also had a suggestion for those plans to invade and occupy Iraq to be "creative" that "Rummy says Defense was preparing for offense on Afghanistan at the time, but Bush asked him to be “creative.” Creative! Perhaps the military could stage a production of Grease for the people of Iraq before taking a bow and dropping a bomb on them?

No instead we just got greasy lies, at the time, and more polished greasy lies now, with the book.

I wonder if his Lie Tour will interfere with his, and his former Shadow President's Armageddon weekends?

Like we said above, Ugh!

Bonus Rummy Riffs

Top Ten Cloves: What Would Be Different If Rumsfeld Was A Dog, But Still Secretary of Defense

Leave It to Rumsfeld ... There's Not Enough Lying Going On!

“They’re coming here for the American experience” ...Rumsfeld Weighs In On Immigration Battle; Won’t Tie It To War With Iran ...Suggests Army Recruiting Woes Could Be Solved With Mandatory Service By Illegal Aliens

Rummy On The Run? ... Let's Give Him Some Chase Music!

Would Rummy Call This "Stuff Happens"

Addington, Yoo and Bybee must be in despair today, bemoaning how could they ever leave something like this out of their memos;

Iraqi militias gluing anuses of gay men and inducing diarrhea to cause death

Relying on an International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission translation of a recent Al Arabiya story, the blog Towleroad reports that Iraqi militias have been engaging in some particularly brutal tactics toward gay men in Iraq:

"A prominent Iraqi human rights activist says that Iraqi militia have deployed a painful form of torture against homosexuals by closing their anuses using 'Iranian gum.' ...Yina Mohammad told Alarabiya.net that, 'Iraqi militias have deployed an unprecedented form of torture against homosexuals by using a very strong glue that will close their anus.' According to her, the new substance 'is known as the American hum, which is an Iranian-manufactured glue that if applied to the skin, sticks to it and can only be removed by surgery. After they glue the anuses of homosexuals, they give them a drink that causes diarrhea. Since the anus is closed, the diarrhea causes death. Videos of this form of torture are being distributed on mobile cellphones in Iraq.'"

And, why is it we need to keep our troops there?

This is the Democracy The Bush Grindhouse wanted to see flourish (and just think, if they had more years, how many more countries would they infect)?

And, it's "being distributed on mobile cellphones in Iraq"?

Maybe we can muster hundreds-and-hundreds of airplanes, and do a humongous "shoe" toss/drop on the entire country.

Jesus, these people are beyond fucking sick.

They are lower than "Sons of Dogs".

Retro Garlic: Life Imitating The Garlic - U.S. Military Will Offer Path to Citizenship

Oh boy, do we love when this happens.

Numerous times, life and The Garlic have merged (you can look HERE and HERE).

Today, we have another Retro Garlic.

Actually, it should be a Retro-Retro Garlic, as we have riffed on this very topic previously.

Last night, we espied this headline;

U.S. Military Will Offer Path to Citizenship

Stretched thin in Afghanistan and Iraq, the American military will begin recruiting skilled immigrants who are living in this country with temporary visas, offering them the chance to become United States citizens in as little as six months.

We weren't sure if that strange sound we heard, simultaneously, was that of Lou Dobb's head exploding, or the Right Wing Freak Show running for their torches and pitchforks, which will surely be likely to occur.

I mean, what are they going to do with all that pent-up xenophobia and jingoism?

First they take our jobs, our seats in schools and clog up our hospitals, now they want to take over the military?

What will become of the Arizona Minutemen?... The thousands-of-miles wall?



Who wants the American dream, sprinkled with a little picante?

2012 and the Rule of Sarah can't come fast enough, heh?

More from the NYT article;

“The Army will gain in its strength in human capital,” General Freakley said, “and the immigrants will gain their citizenship and get on a ramp to the American dream.”

[Snip]

Pentagon officials expect that the lure of accelerated citizenship will be powerful. Under a statute invoked in 2002 by the Bush administration, immigrants who serve in the military can apply to become citizens on the first day of active service, and they can take the oath in as little as six months.

For foreigners who come to work or study in the United States on temporary visas, the path to citizenship is uncertain and at best agonizingly long, often lasting more than a decade. The military also waives naturalization fees, which are at least $675.

To enlist, temporary immigrants will have to prove that they have lived in the United States for two years and have not been out of the country for longer than 90 days during that time. They will have to pass an English test.

The Retro Part, from April 2006 ...

“They’re coming here for the American experience” ... Rumsfeld Weighs In On Immigration Battle; Won’t Tie It To War With Iran ... Suggests Army Recruiting Woes Could Be Solved With Mandatory Service By Illegal Aliens

In a freewheeling exchange with reporters this afternoon, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld suggested that “a stint in the Army” would solve the immigration problem facing the country.

[Snip]

Asked a follow-up question, Rumsfeld said flatly, “Conscripts,”

“We simply make it a policy, if you want to enter this country, or, if we find out you’ve entered illegally, you serve a stretch in the Army, or go back to whatever village or bungalow you came from.”

[Snip]

“They’re coming here for the American experience”

‘That’s absurd,” Rumsfeld squinted. ““They’ll get three-squares-a-day and it pays a helluva lot better then picking lettuce, or grapes, or whatever it is they do ...”

“I mean,” added the Secretary, “they’re coming here for the American experience ... the American Dream ... What could possibly embody that more than by serving in your country’s armed forces?”

Asked if he, or the Pentagon, would make special accommodations for such illegal immigrants to enter the military, such as bi-lingual instructions, or the need for interpreters, Rumsfeld glared at the reporter.

“Now think about that for a second,” Rumsfeld shot back, dripping with disdain. “In the heat of battle, you, or some other bleeding-heart liberal, is going to expect the U.S. Army to issue dictionaries, with bullets flying overhead, and bombs bursting in front of you, so the commander of the unit can issue orders in two languages? What planet are you from?”

Rumsfeld said he would expect any such conscript to learn English, before they get to boot camp.

“I suspect a great many of them already speak English. The busboy at the restaurant I like to go to knows all the television shows ... the sports scores. Sure, he has an accent, but he speaks English fine.”

We can't say "we wished we made this stuff up."

We did.

Bonus Immigration Riffs

Bush Immigration Plan Gets "Some Influence" ... White House May Employ Lincoln Group In Border, Immigration Clash ...Unlike Iraqi Program, PR Firm Will Plant Anti-American Stories in Mexican Media

Top Ten Cloves: Problems The Illegal Immigrant Boycott Caused The White House Yesterday

Breaking News - Congress Said Will “Clean President’s Clock” On Immigration ... Bush Adds Color-Coded Border Alert Chart To Immigration Plan ...Neocons Upset With Shift In White House Strategy: Speech Offered No “Ties To Sadam ... Imminent Mushroom Clouds”

Ahmadinejad “Sort Of An Islamic Lyndon LaRouche”; Said To Have Made Offer To Mexico ...Ahmadinejad Claims Letter A Hoax, Cites Propaganda, Prelude To U.S. Invasion ...Other World Leaders Received Similar Tomes; Mexico Offered Iran National Guard Deployed on Their Side of Border

Cirque de Military Analysts

Back in the early 1980's, during my brief period of performing stand-up comedy, we are at a Open Mike Night, at The Comedy Store, up on Sunset Boulevard, in Hollywood, CA.

A young ventriloquist got his time on stage and up he went, with his dummy, taking a moment to move the stool and get himself situated - and placing the dummy in front of the microphone.

A small wave of titters and laughs went about the room, believing, as one could easily at the moment, that this was part of the routine ... The ventriloquist began his set, barely audible for the packed room and soon, the small titters and laughs stopped ...After a few more moments, it became clear, that the ventriloquist was keeping the dummy in front of the microphone.

Some in the crowd began shouting at him, telling him, quite directly, to move the microphone, to use the microphone ...He continued, through the seemingly never-ending five-minutes without moving the dummy away from the microphone

To be kind, it wasn't part of the act.

Not totally unlike the blockbuster news broken last night by the NYT, with the Cirque de Military Analysts being mouthpieces for the Pentagon and Bush Grindhouse.

Dummies, up in front of the microphone, pouring out the words of their masters.

We riffed on this late last evening and, in the light of day, rereading the article, as well as all the blowback out on the WWW and Blogosphere, it leaves a more disgusting aftertaste.

While we, and others touched on it, it really is colossal, that the overarching goal of the Bush Grindhouse, and the likes to Torie Clarke and Rumsfeld, wasn't that welfare of the soldiers being sent into this blunder (or the lives of the innocent Iraqi citizens), but whether or not they could control the message, control the media.

That was what was most paramount.

Hell, they planned (and executed) on which military man would speak on which network, and give this message or that message, better than anything they planned on the ground in Iraq.

They were more upset of a General speaking out-of-turn, speaking truth, than whether-or-not our soldiers were safe, that they had the proper training, equipment and armor.

It was Wag The Dog, Director's Cut!

While this is wrong on so many levels, (including the NYT publishing this, perhaps as a Mea Culpa, being they were, perhaps, the biggest cheerleader as to WMD's and going into Iraq), that retired military people engaged in this, with total disregard, abdicating, even, in retirement, the moral equivalent, of protecting their soldiers.

Much like a bevy of other Bush Cronies, they simply were looking to cash-in on it.

Larisa Alexandrovna, on her blog At-Largely, has a good post, in which she offers clear vision;

"An excellent article in the NYT today illustrates our continued march toward the marriage of corporate and state interests, otherwise known as fascism ..."

As does Greg Mitchell, out on the HuffPo;

"But to get you started, a few points to keep in mind:

-- The article has at least three tracks: One, the Pentagon deploying the analysts (some 75 in number) and the TV outlets happy to run with them; two, the analysts' further conflict-of-interest in being tied to defense contractors with billions of dollars invested in the war effort; three, the complete lack of interest by the TV outlets in either of the first two connections, or ignoring what they did know. In fact, the networks raised no objections to the Pentagon paying for trips by the analysts.

-- The effort began in "selling the war" -- going where even Judy Miller feared to tread -- and there are some startling admissions by some team members that they knew they were being sold a fairy tale on WMD, but went along with it anyway. The moral bankruptcy is truly disgusting."

And Libby, over on Newshoggers speaks for many;

No surprises here. Simply more proof that we have more to fear from our own government than we do from terrorists.

Haven't seen or heard the three major candidates weigh in on this yet.

And, likely, for at least two of them - Hillary and Obama - we won't hear anything, being it's two-days out from PA voting (and if they have the balls to call this repugnant, or such, Christ, make sure they're wearing a Flag Lapel Pin when the do it ... We don't want to further stress out Nash McCabe).


Some More Links

Praire Weather: "We need to stick our hands up your back and move your mouth for you... "

Steve Benen: Puppets of the Defense Department

Mustang Bobby/Shakesville: The Puppetry of the Pentagon

Think Progress: Pentagon uses military analysts as ‘puppets’ to push talking points


"I'm sorry, can you lie a little louder"

Empty Suits ... “I felt we’d been hosed" ...

Power comes from lying ... Lying big and getting the whole damn world to play along with you ... Once you got everybody agreeing with what they know in their hearts ain't true, you get them by the balls

Senator Roark, from “Sin City - That Yellow Bastard”

Yes, we've used this opening quote before.

How the hell, with the Bush Grindhouse, could you not want to use every single day!

I mean, look over the last seven years ... Christ, these guys must have a small, laminated card they keep in their wallets with this on it ...

It's a morning ritual ... A Daily Prayer ... A mantra ... Any one of the Bush Grindhouse cronies tells more lies before 9AM, then you do all day ...

And, in an article that will appear in the New York Times tomorrow (Sunday), a whole lot of rubes are going to be terribly disappointed;

Message Machine - Behind TV Analysts, Pentagon’s Hidden Hand

Holy Corrupted Captains, Batman! ... Are you saying that retired Military officers got paid to carry the Bush Grindhouse lies?

It's a pretty detailed account of how a whole bunch of retired military people (those talking heads you seen trotted on your television screens, on both, MSM, and Cable, news programs) have been in the pocket of the Bush Grindhouse, from the get-go, to sell the war, sell all that great progress we've been told about, to beat down criticism, and to sing pretty songs before bad news is allowed to squeeze through and reach the general population.

Not exactly earth-shattering, but it is pretty astonishing, just how easily the Bush Grindhouse cronies went about the business of setting this up.

Like riding a bicycle ...

Want a taste?

Kenneth Allard, a former NBC military analyst who has taught information warfare at the National Defense University, said the campaign amounted to a sophisticated information operation. “This was a coherent, active policy,” he said.

As conditions in Iraq deteriorated, Mr. Allard recalled, he saw a yawning gap between what analysts were told in private briefings and what subsequent inquiries and books later revealed.

“Night and day,” Mr. Allard said, “I felt we’d been hosed.”

The Pentagon defended its relationship with military analysts, saying they had been given only factual information about the war. “The intent and purpose of this is nothing other than an earnest attempt to inform the American people,” Bryan Whitman, a Pentagon spokesman, said.

Boy, you know this must be serious ... Bryan Whitman, Pentagon spokesman, had to defend it with two lies, presumably, using a face so straight, you could cut paper on it.

Before we move on, I have to say, when I first saw and read this article, the first thing that came to mind, the very first thing was ...

Former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld.

It was just a few months ago, in January, that Rummy popped out from underneath is rock, and wistfully proposed an official Propaganda Agency;

Leave It to Rumsfeld ... There's Not Enough Lying Going On!

What cosmic forces came together, what asteroid-sized dice rolled a seven, to have former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld come out - the day a quantified and detailed report was released (and with a searchable database) on laying out the Bush Grindhouse's documented lying - and make a call for a new, U.S. Propaganda Agency, ostensibly, to win the hearts and minds of people who, presently, don't like us very much?

So many logistics to work out.

Would this compete with, or augment, the White House Iraq Group (WHIG) and White House Iraq and Iran Group (WHIIG)?

When will this be launched - August is out, per the razor-sharp thinking of Andy Card?

Hmmm ... Maybe Rumsfeld's wishful, and wistful, statement, is a ruse? Maybe it's already in action and Rumsfeld is just out there to throw people off the scent?

And this is what was coming out of Rummy;

We need someone in the United States government, some entity, not like the old USIA . . . I think this agency, a new agency has to be something that would take advantage of the wonderful opportunities that exist today. There are multiple channels for information . . . The Internet is there, pods are there, talk radio is there, e-mails are there. There are all kinds of opportunities. We do not with any systematic organized way attempt to engage the battle of ideas and talk about the idea of beheading, and what's it's about and what it means. And talk about the fact that people are killing more Muslims than they are non-Muslims, these extremists. They're doing it with suicide bombs and the like. We need to engage and not simply be passive and allow that battle of competition of ideas."

This wasn't some item on a wish list ... Or lamenting about "the army you may want ..."

Now, unless dementia is settling in, Rummy, pretty much, laid out exactly the program he, and Torie Clarke ran at the Pentagon!

Yes, the Little Lying Pixie (her official title was "Assistant Secretary of Defense for Public Affairs"), Torie Clarke (who had the guile to title her book "Lipstick on a Pig: Winning In the No-Spin Era by Someone Who Knows the Game").
















Oh, Little Lying Pixie Torie (Friend of Mary Matalin, if that doesn't clinch it) knew how to spin, spin like a top and she certainly knew how to play the game.

Torie Clarke, the former public relations executive who oversaw the Pentagon’s dealings with the analysts as assistant secretary of defense for public affairs, had come to her job with distinct ideas about achieving what she called “information dominance.” In a spin-saturated news culture, she argued, opinion is swayed most by voices perceived as authoritative and utterly independent.

And so even before Sept. 11, she built a system within the Pentagon to recruit “key influentials” — movers and shakers from all walks who with the proper ministrations might be counted on to generate support for Mr. Rumsfeld’s priorities.

Other administrations had made sporadic, small-scale attempts to build relationships with the occasional military analyst. But these were trifling compared with what Ms. Clarke’s team had in mind. Don Meyer, an aide to Ms. Clarke, said a strategic decision was made in 2002 to make the analysts the main focus of the public relations push to construct a case for war. Journalists were secondary. “We didn’t want to rely on them to be our primary vehicle to get information out,” Mr. Meyer said.

From the start, interviews show, the White House took a keen interest in which analysts had been identified by the Pentagon, requesting lists of potential recruits, and suggesting names. Ms. Clarke’s team wrote summaries describing their backgrounds, business affiliations and where they stood on the war.

“Rumsfeld ultimately cleared off on all invitees,” said Mr. Krueger, who left the Pentagon in 2004. (Through a spokesman, Mr. Rumsfeld declined to comment for this article.)

From their earliest sessions with the military analysts, Mr. Rumsfeld and his aides spoke as if they were all part of the same team

So, let's get this straight.

Before September 11th, before the official launch of The Commander Guy's life dream, to invade and occupy Iraq, the Little Lying Pixie Torie Clarke, and her boss, Rummy, looked at retired military officers, not as towers of experience and wisdom, but mere puppets, to spoon-feed lies to, and have them carry those lies to the media, who, in turn, understood to follow their marching orders (under no circumstances, question anything) and pass those lies on to the American people.

For one thing, that's overlooked in the article, this clearly shows, how, early on, the deep, soul-clutching commitment the Bush Grindhouse had to supporting the troops.

Yesiree Bob, one big, heartwarming, fucking Norman Rockwell painting there.

And the Golden Boy, General Petraeus?

Two weeks ago General Petraeus took time out from testifying before Congress about Iraq for a conference call with military analysts.

Mr. Garrett, the Fox analyst and Patton Boggs lobbyist, said he told General Petraeus during the call to “keep up the great work.”

“Hey,” Mr. Garrett said in an interview, “anything we can do to help.”

Go out and read Message Machine - Behind TV Analysts, Pentagon’s Hidden Hand.

If not new news, you will find it breathtaking, the detail of the un-American behavior and practices these people undertook.

And, as you watch the news in the coming weeks, during the campaign, see how much the news programs cut back on using retired Military people on their programs, now that the cat is out-of-the-bag, so publicly, (they should require these guys to disclose that they are lying greedheads; Maybe they should put candy bars, and real scrambled eggs on their uniforms, from now on).

And I may not be posting tomorrow after this.

I think I will be busy, very busy, putting poxes on all of them!


Bonus Link

David Neiwert: When Sock Puppets Rule Our Media

Pale Rider: When the Generals Chose Lies Over Their Soldier's Lives...

Think Progress: Pentagon uses military analysts as ‘puppets’ to push talking points

Kovie: Matthews Tore Torie Clarke New One on Hardball Tonight!

IPS News: Rumsfeld Flees France, Fearing Arrest

“They’re coming here for the American experience”; Rumsfeld Weighs In On Immigration Battle; Won’t Tie It To War With Iran
Suggests Army Recruiting Woes Could Be Solved With Mandatory Service By Illegal Aliens

"He is Iraq's Katrina itself"

Does He Get A New Girlfriend With This Job Too? ... Does The Job "Pay For Itself?

Maybe it's the clarion call of his old colleague, Donald Rumsfeld, that tugs at his heartstrings of public service.

Wolfowitz Returns to U.S. Government as Adviser

As we said when the job offer was reported in December, the board meets quarterly to provide advice to the secretary of state and one of her deputies based on classified intelligence on some of the most important issues in United States foreign policy today, from Iran to North Korea."

Egad!

The Wolf Man, back, prowling the corridors of State.

Hmmm, Rumsfeld calling for a new Propaganda Agency... Wolfowitz, back at the State Department, advising, among other things, on Iran ...

Do we smell a build-up here? ... Get the old team together, for the final run down the stretch, putting their considerable prevarication skills to use for a push into Iran?

Does the girlfriend get a gig too?

Are we gearing up to go after the Filipino Monkey?

Will we soon here the rhetoric, from the Wolf Man, or, perhaps the Madam Secretary herself, that a preemptive, offensive entry into Iran will "pay for itself"?

From The Lede, back in December;

"Another official called the reported appointment “amazing.” That comment alluded to Mr. Wolfowitz’s staunch support for the Iraq War when he was deputy secretary of defense under President George W. Bush. He hasn’t won much good will since then, either during a relatively quick rise and fall as World Bank president, or in his current post at a conservative think tank in Washington.

But if nothing else, Mr. Wolfowitz really needs no introduction, especially to his detractors on the blogs, who are a puzzled, angry lot today:

The Next Hurrah: “Condi, is it a coincidence that so many people responsible for gaming the intelligence to get us into Iraq are on your advisory board?”

The Brad Blog: “In Bushworld, incompetence must be rewarded.”

Arms Control Wonk: “Andrew Sullivan has a better line than I can muster.”

Andrew Sullivan: “He’s advising Condi on WMDs. Curveball wasn’t available?”

So far, The Lede has not turned up any bloggers weighing in to support Mr. Wolfowitz."

On the downside, with the protracted, ugly, almost never-ending saga of his resignation from The World Bank, will the next President be able to get him out of this position?

Stay tuned Wolf Fans, this one is surely to be a ever-giving gift!


Bonus Wolfie Whoppers

Yes, Wolfie, People Will Be Talking, For Years, About You ... The Results - The Garlic Weekly Poll

Larisa Alexandrovna - Scott Ritter: Neocons as Parasites

"Hillary 1984" Video Blogger Takes On Wolfowitz

Andrew Cockburn: The Puppet Who Cleared the Way for Iraq's Destruction

Developing Story! White House Giving World Bank, Wolfowitz Green Light To Blame McNulty; New Strategy Of Leveraging Scandals; Cheney Says Embattled Hero "Definitely In Final Throes" At World Bank















Yeah, it's a head-scratcher to us, too, Wolfie ...

Leave It to Rumsfeld ... There's Not Enough Lying Going On!

What cosmic forces came together, what asteroid-sized dice rolled a seven, to have former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld come out - the day a quantified and detailed report was released (and with a searchable database) on laying out the Bush Grindhouse's documented lying - and make a call for a new, U.S. Propaganda Agency, ostensibly, to win the hearts and minds of people who, presently, don't like us very much?

You can't just let stuff happen, you have to make stuff happen.

From Wired's "Rummy Resurfaces, Calls for U.S. Propaganda Agency";

Private media does not get up in the morning and say what can we do to promote the values and ideas that the free Western nations believe in? It gets up in the morning and says they're going to try to make money by selling whatever they sell... The way they decided to do that is to be dramatic and if it bleeds it leads is the common statement in the media today. They've got their job, and they have to do that, and that's what they do.

We need someone in the United States government, some entity, not like the old USIA . . . I think this agency, a new agency has to be something that would take advantage of the wonderful opportunities that exist today. There are multiple channels for information . . . The Internet is there, pods are there, talk radio is there, e-mails are there. There are all kinds of opportunities. We do not with any systematic organized way attempt to engage the battle of ideas and talk about the idea of beheading, and what's it's about and what it means. And talk about the fact that people are killing more Muslims than they are non-Muslims, these extremists. They're doing it with suicide bombs and the like. We need to engage and not simply be passive and allow that battle of competition of ideas."

Notice how effortlessly, how easy, how endemic it is for these Neocons to include the fearmongering in their speech. Here, much like the continuous thread of the Bush Grindhouse, if we don't engage in a propaganda program, terrorists are going to come and kills us.

Ol' Snowflakes doesn't, necessarily, distinguish how this will be different, from the propaganda machine he manned from the Pentagon during his reign of terror ... Or, how it is different from the on-going operation out of the Bush Grindhouse

Rumsfeld was one of the featured speakers yesterday, at the Network Centric Warfare 2008, sponsored by a handful of mega-corporations, many, no doubt, that have a vested interest in ramping up the warfare propaganda, the better to curry fat contracts if the volume is amped up.

I'm sure, the shadow, play government that he and fellow weekend warrior, Vice President Dick Cheney, operate already have a fully-functional Propaganda Agency up-and-running, no doubt, capable of seamlessly turning into our official, working Propaganda Agency.

So many logistics to work out.

Would this compete with, or augment, the White House Iraq Group (WHIG) and White House Iraq and Iran Group (WHIIG)?

When will this be launched - August is out, per the razor-sharp thinking of Andy Card?

Hmmm ... Maybe Rumsfeld's wishful, and wistful, statement, is a ruse? Maybe it's already in action and Rumsfeld is just out there to throw people off the scent?

This project, shamelessly, but certainly, could be something that would come out of a Rumsfeld-styled propaganda agency

Sigh ... You know what they say ... You have to go to war with the propaganda you have, not the propaganda you might want or wish to have at a later time ...


Bonus Rumsfeld Ramblings

Rumsfeld Blames Contractor, If Media Plant Stories True, But Defends Outsourcing Program; Says "Still Gathering Facts"; If It Turns Out Positive, Will Be Adopted Into New 'National Victory Strategy' Plan

“They’re coming here for the American experience”; Rumsfeld Weighs In On Immigration Battle; Won’t Tie It To War With Iran Suggests Army Recruiting Woes Could Be Solved With Mandatory Service By Illegal Aliens

Top Ten Cloves: What Would Be Different If Rumsfeld Was A Dog, But Still Secretary of Defense

Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow ...

Well he is on the run, technically (and we just gave him a soundtrack to run with), so, perhaps, the exposing of the infamous Rumsfeld Snowflakes is meant to put some heat on him.

Of all the wonderful, thrilling, hilarious Rumfeldspeak ... Deadenders ... Stuff Happens... The Army you have, et all, one of our favorites was learning about the snowflakes.

Rumsfeld, it has been said, buried his staff in them, and likely, if they were measured, they would rival the city of Buffalo's annual snowfall.

In today's Washington Post, Robin Wright offers a peak at the snowflakes with;

From the Desk of Donald Rumsfeld . . .In Sometimes-Brusque 'Snowflakes,' He Shared Worldview, Shaped Policy

Check it out ... It's great and just another glimpse of the Little-Secretary-of-Defense-Who-Could...


Former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, measuring the snowflakes - or the bullshit - he was known to put out

Rummy On The Run? ... Let's Give Him Some Chase Music!

It's unlikely he would have been hunted down, panting, exhausted, with fear-filled eyes, a chalk-marked "M" stamped on his shoulder, like Peter Lorre in the Fritz Lang classic "M" (Sorry, won't daydream again while posting).

More the style of Donald Rumsfeld, former Secretary of Defense, would be to stroll out of the breakfast he was attending in Paris, angrily barking to his aides "Arrest me! ... What planet do they think they are on", or some such Rummyesque verbiage.

Charges were filed in France against Dick Cheney's little weekend-warrior buddy, for torture, by the the International Federation for Human Rights along with the Center for Constitutional Rights, the European Center for Constitutional and Human Rights and the French League for Human Rights, criminal charges for "ordering and authorizing torture."

And since he was in Paris, for some type of meeting with Foreign Policy Magazine, they wanted to catch and arrest the little bugger.

So, as we have done so often for the Bush Grindhouse, we provide a song, some chase music for Rumsfeld to skulk out-of-town with.

Stepping out of our element (Jazz), we turn to a proverbial American Hero, Bruce Springsteen, and his classic anthem, "Born To Run" to provide the right vibe.

Anyone that was a teenager in the 1970's, or older, you sing especially loud.

Born the One's

In the day we sweat it out in the streets of a runaway American government
At night we ride through Middle East with suicide machines
Secure in cages out in Abu Ghraib
Chrome wheeled, fuel injected and steppin' all over the law
Bushie this town rips the bones from their back
Its a death trap, its a stuff happens rap
We gotta torture'em while were young
`cause Neocons like us, Bushie we were born the One's

Bushie let me in I wanna be your friend
I want to guard your dreams and visions
Just wrap your legs round these velvet rims
And strap your hands across my engines
Together we could break this rap
Well torture till we drop, Bushie well never go back
Will you torture with me out on the wire
`cause Bushie I'm just a scared and lonely Rummy
But I gotta find out how it feels
I want to know if torture is wild, Bushie, I want to know if torture is real

Beyond Saddam's palace hemi-powered Humvees scream down the boulevard
The Iraqis comb their hair in rear-view mirrors
And the guards try to beat them so hard
Our amusement park rises bold and stark
Prisoners are huddled on the beach, they're not missed
I wanna die with you Bushie on Baghdad streets tonight
In an everlasting kiss

The highways jammed with broken Neocons on a last chance power drive
All the Neocons out on the run tonight
but theres no place left to hide
Together Bushie we'll live with the sadness
I'll love you with all the madness in my soul
Someday Bushie I don't know when
were gonna get to that place
Where we really want to torture
and we'll walk in the sun
But till then Neocons like us
Bushie, we were born the One's

Bonus Rummy Riffs

Listen To A Clip of "Born To Run"

Top Ten Cloves: What Would Be Different If Rumsfeld Was A Dog, But Still Secretary of Defense

Rumsfeld Declares End to Memo 'Blizzard'

Seymour Hersh - The General’s Report: How Antonio Taguba, who investigated the Abu Ghraib scandal, became one of its casualties.


"Hey, I can daydream, can't I?"

Cheney and Rumsfeld ... You Get Two ... Two ... Two Disasters In One!

They are not identical twins (physically, at least), so it's easy to see why Certs never tapped them for one of their ad campaigns.

Easier to tell them that, rather than admitting you don't want your product associated with truly unmitigated disasters.

Cheney and Rumsfeld ... Rumsfeld and Cheney ... The Governmental version of Martin and Lewis, Siegfried and Roy or, more the case, Fric-and-Frac.

Our constitutionally-Supreme Court-Stolen-elected Darth Vader has been in the news of recent, lamenting in one interview that he disagreed with The Commander Guy on the firing of his buddy, now former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, and in another, being called out, labeled a disaster by former President Jimmy Carter.

Something, I'm sure, the Neocons will be curled up with bewilderment, for years, is how did the most powerful Vice President in history allow his best buddy to be fired? Oh, my goodness gracious!, how did he let one of them get axed?

Rummy is, after all, the flawed architect of the disastrous invasion and occupation of Iraq, the artist of the Katzenjammer Kids blueprint these Neocons drew up. And while he was glib at the earliest stages of the disaster, you have to think how Rummy would have reacted, in his former heyday as CEO of the Searle Drug Co., if one of his production managers offered, as the reason for a failed batch, "stuff happens".

And they had such a good deal going, turning their Armageddon-Weekend-Let's-Rule-The-World-role-playing into reality.

Was it a Tessio moment, as in 'The Godfather', when the former loyal capo is made for his plot, and blurts out "Hell, he can't do that ... It screws up all my plans ..."

Was it bad timing, the one-day-a-year where he actually let The Decider Guy be President and, Oh My God, look what he's done!

Hard to put the Genie back in the bottle without calling attention to himself.

Best he could do, very pointedly, was to call his Armageddon-weekend pal "The finest Secretary of Defense this nation has ever had,”

As to Jimmy Carter ... The VP must have run out of ink, furiously scribbling notes in the column on this one, albeit, with no Covert-CIA Agent-wife to expose in retribution.

How frustrating.

Along with "denouncing Vice President Dick Cheney as a "disaster", in the BBC World News America interview, the peanut-farming, home-building ex-Prez also added;

"He's a militant who avoided any service of his own in the military and he has been most forceful in the last 10 years or more in fulfilling some of his more ancient commitments that the United States has a right to inject its power through military means in other parts of the world," Carter told the BBC World News America in an interview to air later on Wednesday.

I'm sure he's not feeling like "Dick, The Magic Vice-Prez" these days. Rummy, and The Scooter, are gone and his current staff of law-breaking, Constitutional Stormtroopers must be tiring of having that same "Let's bomb Iran" conversation every day.

The script for Little Timmy Russert, the one detailing all those mushrooms clouds stockpiled in Tehran, sits in the draw collecting dust, for the moment.

The empire is going soft, he must be thinking, with the new guy, Robert "What Intelligence?" Gates not drinking the Kool Aid, having a different agenda and Nanny of State Condoleeza Rice wanting to coddle the terrorists and legitimize those Islamo thugs.

With the clock running out, how will the chest-thumping (well, okay, in his case, it's more a soft patting), most-powerful Vice President-in-history ever fulfill his 30-year plan for his above-the-law Imperial Presidency?

Oh yeah, you can bet, in their weekend Armageddon frolicking, Rummy is still their Secretary of Defense.


Bonus Dynamic Duo Links

Barry Crimmins: Weekend Rumsfeld's Mysterious Resignation

Joan Walsh: Rumsfeld's legacy: Iraq and Dick Cheney

Robert Parry: Rumsfeld's legacy: Iraq and Dick Cheney

Fric-and-Frac

Top Ten Cloves: How History Would Be Different if Bush & Co. Were The Ones To First Discover America

News Item: The DNA Age; Seeking Columbus’s Origins, With a Swab

10. We would now be celebrating Dick Cheney Day in October

9. All the crew, from all the ships would be Stop-Lossed, and forced to serve another 15-months

8. Critics of the expedition would be branded as "Viking sympathizers and appeasers"

7. Bush would set out to prove his bigger goal, that the world was flat, which would include invading and occupying Iraq

6. Native population would be immediately declared "Enemy Combatants", and shipped off to Cuba for detention

5. Burning Spear's song, "A Damn Blasted Liar" would still be apropos

4. 2nd Mate Paul Wolfowitz would boast that the new land's natural resources would pay for the expedition

3. History would show conch shells to be the early, rudimentary beginnings of the NSA Illegal Wiretapping program

2. 1st Mate Donald Rumsfeld would deflect criticism by saying "You set sail with the ships you have, not the ships you you might want or wish to have at a later time."

1. Best of all, Captain Bush would start issuing "Signing Statements ", and go about making up the law as he went along


Happy Dick Cheney Day Links

BBC: They Discovered America

Franklin W Knight: The legacies of Christopher Columbus

James Carroll: A troubling turn in American history