Saturday, February 02, 2008

Breaking News! Bush Sees Shadow; Another Year of Lawbreaking Predicted

Oval Office Event Draws Thousands; Top Hat and Tails, and an Outcome "Just Like The Movie"

In what started out as an inside joke, among just a few staffers, has now grown to a full-scale event, with thousands of government employees gathering around the West Wing, and the grounds of the Bush GrindHouse, to see the spectacle.

For the past seven years, as soon as The Commander Guy walks into the Oval Office on February 2nd, hearts are stopped and breath is held - will he see his shadow, a bona fide indicator of continued disregard for the laws of the country - or not.

Reports are just coming in, over the roar of the crowd - The Commander Guy saw his own shadow ... Another year of lawbreaking lays ahead!

Often timed with the other famous prognosticator, Puxsutawney Phil, the legendary Pennsylvania groundhog, who also saw his own shadow this morning, the Oval Office event has grown to almost the same, frenzied, party-atmosphere as takes place in Gobbler's Knob.

Government employees from the State Department, Pentagon, Transportation, FBI, CIA, including some who travel to Washington from federal offices around the country, and a few from international posts, all begin gathering at and around the Bush Grindhouse in the pre-dawn hours, some staking out positions days in advance.

For the occasion, as like the crew at Gobbler's Knob, those that work in the West Wing, don tails and top hats, and only a chosen few handle The Commander Guy after he's seen his own shadow.

A cottage industry has grown around the Oval Office event, with trinkets, tchochtkes and T-Shirts - this year's showing, being the last Bush Shadow event, on the front, an outline of hand, holding a pen over a document, and, on the back, a listing of The Commander Guys' over-700 Signing Statements.

Vice President Dick Cheney, sources have told The Garlic, was at the event, wearing last years' official T-Shirt, simply the image of a pair of headphones embracing the country at both coasts, with the words "We're Listening" underneath.

"This really has come to emulate the movie," offered Hildy Johnson, editor of the monthly newsletter “What Did He Say Now?” that tracks and reviews President Bush’s speeches and interviews, referring to the comedy classic, 'Groundhog Day'.

"Bill Murray goes through the same day, over and over, and nothing happens to him," continued Johnson. "He doesn't get injured or hurt ...Arrested ... Nothing happens ... And Bush, it's the same thing ... He breaks law after law and nothing happens to him ... It's amazing, just like the movie."

Bonus Groundhog Riffs

Groundhog Lied; Investigation Launched

Breaking News! Bush Administration To Tap Punxsutawney Phil To Bolster Foreign Policy; Gobbler's Knob Appearance Tomorrow Will Be Last For Famous Prognosticator

More Discord In The White House; White House At Odds With Groundhog Hire, Handlers Over Cheney Shooting; Bush Said To Be "Livid, As Famous Prognosticator 'Never Tipped Us Off"; UK's Blair Said To Be Frantic For Direction

For the occasion, as like the crew at Gobbler's Knob, those that work in the West Wing, don tails and top hats, and only a chosen few handle The Commander Guy after he's seen his own shadow.

Minced Garlic: New Keith Olbermann Special Comment ... Bush put telecoms ahead of citizens

Sorry we're late with our usual highlighting of, yet another stellar, Keith Olbermann Special Comment, fumed and ranted Thursday evening (For one, The Garlic has been working at half-speed the past few days, a bit under-the-weather and, MSNBC was a bit slow in posting the transcript).

Olbermann tackled the FISA fiasco, and was particularly steamed throughout the special comment.

The Garlic already had its' rant on this last Monday, offering the Democrats in Congress two reasons not to cave in on this issue.

For The Commander Guy, his henchmen (and the entire Republican Freakshow echo machine) has done purple-in-the-face, demanding Congress give The Commander Guy HIS FISA Bill, his Orwellian 'Protect America Act', for if they don't, terrorists are going to immediately invade the country and kill us all.

Being the current law works just fine (assuming, the people working it are honest and law-abiding), and it's been crystal clear this fevered push for The Commander Guy's PAA is about giving immunity to the telecommunications companies that broke the law with them.

With every dam, there comes a crack;

Which is why the Vice President probably shouldn't have phoned in to the Rush Limbaugh Propaganda-Festival yesterday.

Sixth sentence out of Mr. Cheney's mouth.

The FYCA bill is about, quote, "retroactive liability protection for the companies that have worked with us and helped us prevent further attacks against the United States."


Mr. Cheney is something of a loose cannon, of course.

But he kind of let the wrong cat out of the bag there.

Because Mr. Bush and the corporations he values more than people didn't want anybody to verify what Mark Klein says.

Mark Klein is the AT&T Whistleblower who appeared on this newscast last November... who explained, in the placid, dull terms of your local neighborhood IT desk, how he personally attached all of AT&T's circuits, everything carrying every phone call, every e-mail, every bit of web browsing into a secure room — Room Number 641-A, at the Folsom Street facility in San Francisco, where it was all copied so the government could look at it.

Not some of it; not just the international part of it; certainly not just the stuff some truly patriotic and telepathic spy might be able to divine had been sent or spoken by or to a terrorist.


Every time you looked at a naked picture, every time you bid on eBay, every time you phoned-in a donation to a Democrat.

"My thought was 'George Orwell's 1984,'" Mr. Klein told me, reflecting back, "and here I am, being forced to connect the Big Brother machine."
And there was this chewy morsel of a caveat;
There's yet another level to this, and here we move from Big Brother to Sleazy Son.

Mr. Bush's new Attorney General, Mr. Mukasey, the one who has already taken four different positions on water-boarding, and who may yet tie that record on this subject of telecom immunity, he has a very personal stake in this.

There happens to be a partner in the law firm of Bracewell and Giuliani, named Marc Mukasey. And Bracewell and Giuliani and the Attorney General's son Marc, just happen to represent Verizon.

You know, Verizon — Telecom Giant.

And all of a sudden this is no longer just a farce in which "protecting the Telecoms" is dressed up for us as, "protecting us from terrorist conference calls."

Now it begins to look like the bureaucrats of the Third Reich trying to protect the Krupp Family industrial giants by literally re-writing the laws for their benefit.

And we know how that turned out: Alfried Krupp and eleven of his directors were convicted of War Crimes at Nuremburg.
Hmmm ... The new Crony General has a personal stake in this ... Very interesting ...That is, of course, the Crony General admits to having son ...

Why, just the other day, the Crony General displayed his prowess;

From Glenn Greenwalds' "Mukasey's radical worldview is now the norm";
While Mukasey may be marginally more straightforward than Alberto Gonzales was -- more willing to conform to the procedural formalities of independence -- he is, ideologically, a clone of John Yoo and David Addington and is as much of a loyal adherent to the Bush/Cheney extremist worldview as Gonzales ever was.

Mukasey explicitly embraces the most extreme theories of presidential omnipotence and lawlessness and displays as much Cheney-ite contempt for the notion of Congressional oversight as the Vice President himself. He repeatedly endorsed patently illegal behavior -- including torture -- and refused even to pretend that he cared what the Senate thought about any of it. He even told Republican Senators that they have no right to pass a whistleblower law allowing federal employees who learn of lawbreaking to inform Congress about it, because such a law would infringe on the President's constitutional powers. In Mukasey's worldview, the President has unlimited power and Congress has none.
And Dahlia Lithwick, over on Slate, from her "Thank You. Now Go to Hell.Mukasey stonewalls Senate Democrats on water-boarding, and practically everything else.";
Over the course of a long, maddening day, it's quickly manifest that Mukasey's legal opinions have a 30-second shelf life. He won't opine on what's happened in the past and he won't opine on anything that might happen in the future. When Sen. Arlen Specter—concerned about seven years of vast new claims of executive authority—asks Mukasey whether, in his view, the president "can break any law he pleases because he's the president—including, say, statutes banning torture," as well as FISA and the National Security Act, Mukasey replies, "I can't contemplate any situation in which this president would assert Article II authority to do something that the law forbids."

"Well, he did just that when he violated the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act," Specter shoots back. Mukasey's response? "Both of those issues have been brought within statutes."

Specter is flabbergasted: "But he acted in violation of statutes, didn't he?"

"I don't know," Mukasey replies. But does is really matter? What's past is past.

And Sheldon Whitehouse, D-R.I., tries to get Mukasey to explain why the Justice Department is investigating the destruction of the CIA torture tapes, but not investigating the underlying torture itself.

Mukasey's reply, "I don't start investigations out of curiosity," speaks for itself. When Whitehouse tries to get Mukasey to agree that they both know enough classified information to have a very concrete, nonspeculative legal discussion about whether what happened on those tapes is legal, Mukasey again insists that whether or not what happened on those tapes is legal is about which "certifications were given" and "who permissibly relied on it." Whitehouse calls this the "Nuremberg defense. ... I had authorization and therefore I'm immune from prosecution."
Any doubt that Crony General will go after those undertaking the illegal wiretapping?

Me thinks pigs will fly before that ever happens

Read Keith Olbermann's Special Comment "Bush put telecoms ahead of citizens; Pres. Bush demands a law which would clear phone giants from responsibility for government's unjustified spying on Americans"

Watch The Special Comment Video

Friday, February 01, 2008

Exclusive: Edwards Endorses!

This hot news comes today from Barry Crimmins' website, and it's pretty funny ...

Crimmins, along with Randy Credico and Richard Corey (son of the legendary professor, Irwin) , were the ones' who got it up

Check out Exclusive: Edwards Endorses!

And speaking of John Edwards, there sits a great deal of irony, that, while he was valiantly campaigning, the MSM either ignored him, or derided him ... Now that he has bowed out, they are now foaming-at-the-mouth about who Edwards will endorse, who the Edwards' voters will support ...

Paul Krugman has a good column on it today

And Jill, over on Brilliant at Breakfast really nails it

For future generations, and political folklore, for leaving his mark, perhaps, we'll have to place "Edwards Was Here" with the same stature, as "Kilroy Was Here" from Tom Brokaw's favorite time, a few generations ago ...

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Top Ten Cloves: Ways To Liven Up The Democrats' Debate This Evening

News Item: Obama, Clinton set for one-on-one face off

10. Set new rules - Since the debate is in Hollywood, make Hillary and Obama give their answers in David Mamet dialogue

9. Announce ahead of time to the audience, a secret word and then, when Hillary or Obama says it, a cartoon of a duck with a cigar drops from the ceiling with $100 bill for them

8. With work slowed down due to the Writer's Strike, pitch in and allow stand-ins and stunt-doubles during the debate

7. Make it interactive, since it's at the Kodak Theatre, and allow regular people on stage during the debate, to snap photos, capturing their "Kodak Moment"

6. If the debate is close, as a tie-breaker, announce whoever can name the most stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame will be declared the winner

5. To ensure a bevy of YouTube posts, have them take hits of helium before, and during, the debate

4. Being that both going to do a lot of spinning, instead of chairs, tables or podiums, place Hillary and Obama for the debate in one of those giant teacups from Disneyland

3. Hire a couple of seat-fillers from the Academy Awards and toss a few questions at them

2. To eliminate the bickering, set it up like the gameshow "Twenty-One", and put Hillary and Obama in soundproofs booths so they can't hear each others answers

1. Get things settled this evening - Have them arm-wrestle for the delegates from Florida and Michigan

Bonus Debate Riffs

Riding The Woody Allen Train To Last Night's MSNBC Democrat Debate

Top Ten Cloves: Things Overheard At Democratic Candidates Debate

Barry Crimmins Is Rolling ... Snake Eyes!

To eliminate the bickering, set it up like the gameshow "Twenty-One", and put Hillary and Obama in soundproofs booths so they can't hear each others answers

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The Bob Dole For The New Millennium

So, Johnnie McCain survives in the Sunshine State, besting Make-Up Mitt, Rudy911 and The Huckster.

Or, as Melissa McEwan put it, over on Shakespeare's Sister;

"As Petulant mentioned in his Morning Readings, John "The Defaultinator" McCain took the all-important GOP Florida primary yesterday, eking out another win on the basis of merely not being a cross-dressing philanderer, a lying dog-torturer in magic underpants, or a virulently misogynist theocrat. Way to be the least objectionable specimen in a barrel of worm-infested apples, McCain! A hearty congrats from all your fans at Shakesville.
The prediction, according to the babbling talking heads last evening, is that the GOP will, slowly, begin to stand in line behind Johnnie Boy, for he, with his war heroism, deep Senatorial experience, and, by gosh, his Come-Back-Kid determination, is the only one, the gallant RNC soldier-in-shining-armor who can take on the Dragon Hillary.

The GOP, for many reasons, is on their knees every night, praying for a Hillary-McCain showdown.

It will be the 1990's all over again, with needing little more than to pull out the Clinton Bashing box from the archives.

If you were, during the South Carolina Primary, confused as to which Clinton was running, wait'll a general election of McCain-Hillary ... You'll have a clearer vision looking through the bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle ...

For, if they get Obama, it will be the Kennedy-Nixon Debate every single day of the campaign, McCain tripping over his Father Time beard, a skeletal-dust-filled suit laying in front of the voting stations by the time election day rolls around.

The youth and exuberance, the oratory skills, of Obama will paint the Straight Talk Express bus into a hearse, McCain's campaign posters into The Picture of Dorian Gray.

And that's just the visuals.

McCain's going to have an arduous campaign, having to carry The Commander Guy on this back throughout.

It will be hope, and rebuilding America's integrity, versus the 100-year war candidate.

No doubt, the McCain crew is already starting to put the bus in reverse, and will frame McCain's hawkish embrace of the Bush Doctrine as a Korea-like, policing mission.

Good luck, and order some neck braces.

Driving in reverse for so long a period of time is surely to cause some discomfort.

Hmmm ... Didn't Bob Dole have his own bag of war heroism, and his own deep Senatorial experience?

If Dole isn't plagued by raging hard-ons, maybe, just maybe, the GOP will really reach into the "It's Your Turn" bag and match up Dole with Johnnie for another run at it, punching the All-Time, Grand OLD Party ticket ...

To steal from The Commander Guy ... Bring them on!

Bonus Johnnie Boy Riffs

Barry Crimmins: Whispering John's big night

ABC News: High School Student to McCain: You're No Leader

Arianna Huffington: Those Were the Days: Bush and McCain Use 9/11 Nostalgia to Sell the Surge

McCain Sings: "Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran," At Campaign Stop

McCain Calls For MoveOn.Org To Be "Thrown Out of the Country"

McCain says he wants to shoot Osama


John McCain & Miss Teen SC on Economics

The Buzzards Are Picking At Each Other ...

Leave it to the Bush Grindhouse, the Neocon Nitwits and the freakshow dittoheads.

Right Wing Attacks Khalilzad For Not Defending Bolton’s Honor: ‘A Lack Of Testicular Fortitude’

Last Saturday, Zalmay Khalilzad, U.S. ambassador to the United Nations, participated in a panel discussion on Iranian foreign policy with two high-ranking Iranian officials at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland. The New York Times reports that the White House and Condoleezza Rice were “angered” by Khalilzad’s move because he did not receive explicit authorization.

The moderator of the forum joked that Khalilzad has a “really formidable advantage of having a name that is not John Bolton.” Because Khalilzad let that comment stand without repudiating it, right-wing bloggers have erupted in full rage that Khalilzad did not jump to defend Bolton’s honor (as they surely would have). Thus, Khalilzad’s behavior was “disgusting,” “an insult to the United States” and showed “a lack of testicular fortitude”:
Bolton was a joke, so, the moderators' comment was spot on, more of an observation and compliment, than anything else.

But what am I saying? ... OMG! ... Someone in the administration talked to an Iranian!

From The L.A. Times;
"Khalilzad did not veer from the U.S. position, but broke rules that permit Bush administration officials to discuss issues with Iranians only under limited circumstances and with advance approval.

"Ambassador Khalilzad's appearance with the Iranian foreign minister and presidential advisor was not authorized," said a State Department spokesman, who declined to be identified while discussing a personnel issue. He said officials would speak to Khalilzad about the infraction."
No doubt, Khalilzad must have been put through a Karen Silkwood scrubdown soon after the meeting.

Hmmm ... I wonder, if they're more pissed off, because they got caught with their fearmongering-warmongering pants down last month ...

Who knows, maybe Khalilzad was buttering them up, trying to find out who the "Filipino Monkey" is?

Bonus Reads

Cernig: Khalilzad Goes Off The Reservation

Kevin Drum: US AND THEM....

NYT: White House Criticizes Envoy Over Iran

Bolton: Card Had White House In Coma; White House Shake-Up Causes Bolton Snafu; Fiery UN Ambassador Thought Bush Reaching Out To Him; Lambastes Card and “that little bean-counting pansy”

Breaking News! Zidane Signals New Era of “Hooligan Diplomacy”; Have Head-Butt, Will Travel - Mr. Zizou Goes To Washington; World Cup Golden Ball Winner Wooed By Bush Team; Likely Will Be Assigned To Bolton at U.N.

"I will not have members of my administration talking to Iranians!"

Good Post Alert: Fox News is in for a very rough 2008

"The fledgling Fox Business Network, whose anemic ratings are in danger of being surpassed by some large city public access channels."

If their motto, during the Republican reign, has been "Fair and Balanced", what becomes of it during a Democrat-occupied White House?

Eric Boehlert, over on Media Matters, has a rundown on Faux News, that is most entertaining;

Fox News is in for a very rough 2008

"The point is that Fox News years ago made an obvious decision to appeal almost exclusively to Republican viewers. The good news then for Fox News was that it succeeded. The bad news now for Fox News is that it succeeded.

Meaning, when the GOP catches a cold, everybody at Fox News gets sick. As blogger Logan Murphy put it at Crooks and Liars, "Watching FOXNews getting their comeuppance has been fun to watch. They made their bed, now they're having to lie in it and it's not too comfortable."
It was Fat City, replicating and echoing the GOP/RNC/Bush Grindhouse Talking Points, but that, in all likelihood, is coming to an end.

If electing Hillary or Obama in November causes an earthquake, there'll be a nearly-as-large aftershock, being the fall of the vaunted leader,. Roger Ailes.

For even one of the best, and mightiest, smearmeisters will have the most difficult time spinning his way out of this one.

And, speaking of the Fox Business Channel, The Garlic pointed out, perhaps the beginning of his slide downward last year, a major missed opportunity by Ailes, a no-brainer that he, inexplicably, missed.

Now, the future looks even bleaker, perhaps forcing the Faux News Network to shift into one of those sundown-to-sunrise broadcasters, an extended, barely-watched news infomercial for the freakshow and dittoheads.

But never say never ... Something could happen to change their fortunes ... Maybe some new blood will come along ... Maybe someone like, say, Mary Katharine Ham, to pull them out of the fire ...

Check out "Fox News is in for a very rough 2008" ... Stay informed!

Bonus Faux News Riffs

The Lies of Roger Ailes

Every which way but loofah; Inside the Bill O'Reilly sexual harassment lawsuit

POLL: Time For Us To Label Fox?

Breaking News! Fox Bounces The Juice and Brings In The Scooter; OJ Out, Libby In, As Fox Looks To Make Lemonade Out Of Their Lemons; Reagan Snares Cheney Aide For “If I Leaked ...” Special; No Hush Money But Donation Made To Defense Fund

Thank You, John Edwards!

Well, I guess our call to "Ring A Bell Today For John Edwards" fell silent ... Or, as with voters, just not enough bells were rung.

News jawdropper this morning is that John Edwards will announce this afternoon that he is exiting the campaign for president.

It became an enormous, uphill struggle, battling against the two, pockets-stuffed-with-money, mega-deathstars and you don't win the nomination with only third-place finishes.

And the road ahead promised more of those.

Logan Murphy, from Crooks and Liars;

"John ran a good campaign and vowed to stay in it all the way to the convention, but apparently that’s not going to happen. John’s populist message scared the daylights out of the wealthy elite and the corporate media, which ultimately hurt his coverage. We wish him and his family all the best.

Steve Benen, from The Carpetbagger Report;
"First, Edwards exits with his head held high, knowing that he ran a strong, uphill campaign, which drove the Democratic message more than a lot of people realize. I’m reminded of this recent piece from Chris Hayes.

No matter who wins the Democratic nomination, the fact remains that the Edwards campaign has set the domestic policy agenda for the entire field. He was the first with a bold universal healthcare plan, the first with an ambitious climate change proposal that called for cap-and-trade, and the leader on reforming predatory lending practices and raising the minimum wage to a level where it regains its lost purchasing power….Ultimately, though, the Edwards campaign has been both a campaign and a cause, with the latter outperforming the former. Few remember that the signature economic policy of Bill Clinton’s presidency, balancing the budget, originated as a plank in the platform of his primary rival Paul Tsongas. If the next Democratic President manages to pass universal healthcare or a carbon cap-and-trade, we’ll owe the Edwards campaign a significant debt."
Yes, with his head held high, Mr. Edwards may be dropping out of the campaign, but I doubt he will exit the stage completely, carrying on for the causes he believes in, surely to make a difference in the long run, surely to continue the fight to make the world a better place.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Conservative Journalist, Unaware of Google, Wikipedia, Earns Olbermann's 'Worst Person in the Word!

File this under "dumb-as-a-doorknob".

Man, maybe they gotta start bumping up the pay, over there on Townhall.Com.

Either hire competent people, with the ability to have cognitive thought, or, trainers, to teach them how to use Google Search, and Wikipedia.

For Townhall.Com, that bastion of rightwing freakshowers (" is designed to amplify conservative voices in America’s political debates just as the 2006 and 2008 election cycles begin to heat up ... By uniting the nations’ top conservative radio hosts with their millions of listeners, breaks down the barriers between news and opinion, journalism and political participation -- and enables conservatives to participate in the political process with unprecedented ease."), has a managing editor, for who, apparently, both tools are a complete mystery to her.

Appearing on CNN's Reliable Sources this past weekend ... Well, let me show you how Crooks and Liars put it;

"I’m not sure how the Reliable Sources crew let this ignorant statement by Mary Katharine Ham, blogger and managing editor of Townhall.Com get by."
And what gleaming medallion of ignorance did Mary Katharine Hamm show off?
"HAM: Well, I think Clinton has a duality. You know, he’s the charming guy, he’s the nice guy, but he’s also a guy who’s prone to eruptions and some falsehoods.

You know, he’s like The Incredible Hulk, except he turns sort of purple and blotchy instead of green. But, you know, I think he’s sort of a victim of the - or not a victim, but he’s getting used to the 24-hour news cycle. When he was president, he was not subjected to quite as much scrutiny, and I think he got a lot of passes, and now he’s mad he’s not getting them anymore."
As C&L followed - "Was she even a little bit conscious during his presidency? Apparently not"

Either she is extremely gullible, as in her co-workers pulled a "Yeah, this is how it went down, go with that" prank on her, or she is just tremendously vapid.

"Not subjected to quite as much scrutiny" ... "I think he got a lot of passes" ...


Roughly eight-years since he left office and they're still pounding-the-shit out of him!

This, rightly so, caught the eye of MSNBC Countdown host, Keith Olbermann, and, fit quite perfectly into his "Worst Person in the World" segment.

Naturally, Ham took top honors last evening.

OLBERMANN: Coming up to the last State of the Union address by the 43rd president of the United States, George Walker Bush. Chris Matthews joins me. And the president breaks some kind of record by devoting a large part of his speech to the subject of Iraq for the seventh consecutive State of the Union. That‘s next.

But first time for COUNTDOWN‘s worst persons in the world. The bronze shared by the well-publicized Choate Prep School in Connecticut and Karl Rove, who had to cancel Mr. Rove‘s scheduled appearance as commencement speaker this year. He will come to campus and give an address next month instead.

But the mind boggling part of it, Choate‘s director of strategic marketing and communications Mary Verselli said Mr. Rove had been invited to talk about broader issues, not deliver a political speech. What in God‘s name made you think Karl Rove has ever thought about broader issues?

Our runner-up, Glenn Beck. On TV last Friday after somebody referenced the is Obama black enough nonsense. He says, can you imagine a white commentator saying that? Can you imagine if I had said, is Barack Obama black enough? I mean, I don‘t see that man as black.

On February 12 of 2007 on the radio he said, Barack Obama is quote, “very white in many ways. He is colorless. As a white guy you don‘t notice he is black. So he might as well be white. Do you know what I mean?”

Yes. Sometimes it is not just the dumb, it is the hypocritical.

But our winner, Mary Katharine Ham, the managing editor of the Web site So lost in radicalism that its headline today insists Senator Joe McCarthy was really great and he got slandered in everything. She was on CNN over the weekend saying former President Clinton‘s controversial role in the campaign owes to the fact that is just quote, “getting used to the 24-hour news cycle. When he was president, he wasn‘t subjected to quite as much scrutiny. I think he got a lot of passes.”

Now Miss Ham, I understand that you were 15 the day that MSNBC was announced and 16 when FOX Noise signed on. But the next time you are going to say something quite this moronic, please ask somebody first. FOX did the Clinton/Lewinsky story from hot and cold running taps, 24 hours a day for two years. We did it about 22 hours a day. And CNN and all the broadcast networks and radio and Republicans washed it through Matt Drudge seven days a week. And we even the Internet back then. It ran on steam and a pass. He got a pass. He got impeached. Like Bret Baier saying Abraham Lincoln left office. He got a pass. He was impeached for less than the new guy does on your average Thursday morning. A pass! Mary Katharine Ham, tonight‘s worst person—a pass—in the world!"
Seeing it in transcript form doesn't quite convey the animation and incredulousness in which Olbermann bestowed "Worst Person in the World" on Ham.

So, let's go to the videotape ...

Olbermann names Mary Katharine Ham worst person

Maybe, on her HamNation thingy, instead of dumping on Barack Obama, she can play a round of "Know Your Presidents", with herself as the sole contestant.

Considering who she works, maybe, she'll get one right.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Top Ten Cloves: Things Overheard During The Presidents State of the Union Address

News Item: Embargoed: State of the Union Text (We’ll start respecting White House embargoes when they start telling the truth. Here is President Bush’s FINAL State of the Union address)

10. Jesus, he hasn't finished yet? ... I think he's gonna keep us here 100-years...

9. Is that a veto in your pocket, Mr. President, or you just glad to illegally listen in on my calls ...

8. I heard the CIA held up the speech ... They wanted it, in writing, that none of their covert agents would be outted, no matter who writes what

7. Hey, we got a pool going ... Who sucks up to the speech more tomorrow - John McCain or Mitt Romney?

6. That French trader blows $7-Billion and gets arrested... Bush blows $10-Billion -a-month - in Iraq, and we have to sit here and listen to him

5. If really wants to put out a Stimulus Package, that would be for him, and Cheney to resign ... That'll stimulate the country, all right

4. I heard, as a protest, Lou Dobbs was setting up loud speakers along the border, so the illegals coming over tonight can hear the speech

3. I wonder what Obama will say when Kennedy Jr. there says he'll give him a lift home

2. Gee, I would have thought, for the last one, that he'd let Cheney give it

1. Lame Duck President ... Last SOTU ... Turn up the "Boring Dial" full blast!

Bonus SOTU Riffs

Barry Crimmins: Monday Night Goofball

Think Progress: Bush SOTU guest illegal under administration policies

White House releases guest list for State of the Union

Think Progress - SOTU: Bush Is Forced To Withraw Troops From Iraq Because Of Weakened Military

The Lede: Iraqi Government Tackles Global Warming

Taylor Marsh: Our Long National Nightmare is Almost Over

The Exit - It can't come fast enough!

We Looked In the DIY Section, But Bob Vila Didn't Have A Handbook On It ...

Somewhat ironic, or, apropos, that this article hits today, on the eve of the SOTU.

For, it highlights one of the Bush Grindhouse's legacy accomplishments - turning the United States of America into a nation that tortures prisoners.

Spencer Ackerman, former stalwart of TPMmuckracker, writing now for The Washington Independent, has penned a beauty, detailing the sorry, sad road the Central Intelligence Agency (oxymoron?) - at the direction and order of The Commander Guy - has taken us down;

CIA Largely in the Dark on Interrogation Tactics; Bush Tasked Agency To Build a Robust System, Despite Its Limited History;

But 9/11 changed all that. Despite having nearly no off-the-shelf experience, the CIA was tasked by President Bush to come up with a robust interrogation program for the most important al-Qaeda captives. So the agency turned to its partners for assistance in designing its interrogation regimen: Israel, Egypt, Saudi Arabia—all countries cited by the State Department for using torture—among others. Additionally, as Mark Benjamin has reported for Salon, two psychologists named Bruce Jessen and James Mitchell, who worked as contractors for CIA, helped the agency "reverse-engineer" the military and CIA training on resisting torture for use on detainees. Suddenly, waterboarding, an illegal practice of simulating or in some cases inducing drowning, became an American-administered practice.
So much for the "CEO" presidency... Be it launching unneeded wars, to reacting to natural disasters (versus the ones they created), to running the Injustice Department, to protecting its' own intelligence agents, It's been DIY all the way, and bad DIY at that ...

Read Spencer Ackerman's "CIA Largely in the Dark on Interrogation Tactics; Bush Tasked Agency To Build a Robust System, Despite Its Limited History" ... It's a good one!

Bonus CIA Riffs

Bob Vila Home Improvement

Top Ten Cloves: Problems Created With President Bush Admitting To CIA Black Site Prisons

Leak of CIA Covert Prison System May Affect IPO, Franchising Rights; Early Heavy Investment Cools In Wake of Story; North Korea May Trade Nuke Program For Multiple Prisons

Top Ten Cloves: Ways White House Aides Got President Bush To Claim "We Do Not Torture"

Top Ten Cloves: Ways CIA Will Cut Back On Using Contractors

Top Ten Cloves: Things About The New CIA Personality Test

Hey, Dems, Let'em Veto It! ... Here's All The Ammunition You Need!

There is a small, but fascinating. drama that is to play out in the nation's capital today.

Before sunset, the Senate resumes its' debate, and possible vote, on the Protect America Act, the FISA Bill that the Bush Grindhouse wants, the one that will give immunity to the telecommunications companies that went along with them in breaking the law.

After sunset, the Lame Duck Commander Guy will take to the podium, before a joint session of Congress, and deliver his final (Thank God!) State of the Union address.

Whether he crows, or carps, all depends on what happens in the Senate.

No doubt the Stepford Republicans will continue to block, and otherwise attempt to bully through what the Bush Grindhouse wants.

They, along with the Bush Grindhouse will be laying down the vibe - as they have all along - of fearmongering, claiming the Democrats will get us killed while they, thumping their chests, are the protectors.

Trust us, we'll take care of you ...

Fat chance.

So, Harry Reid, and all you other Democrats, here's your ammunition.

Bush Lied!

Over 935 times (and that's just a couple of years) on the threats to the country, to justify his preemptive, colossal mistake, in taking us into Iraq.

While we have all known this, it was documented last week... And with a searchable database, in case you want to cherry pick some of the juicy lies.

But wait, there's more bullets.

Why not force the Stepford Republican to explain, and justify, The Commander Guy's giving up on capturing Osama bin Laden?

Have them explain the need to continue this illegal wiretapping program, and the need to give immunity, because, if the bill isn't passed, the terrorists are going to come and get us.

Have him explain how his illegal wiretapping is only capturing the conversation of terrorists, and not American citizens.

Point out, that their fearless leader has already given up ... That he's content to pass it along to the next president, the justice due Osama bin Laden.

So much for the Republican being our protectors.

The Commander Guy has indicated he will veto the bill, if it is not exactly how it wants it.


Let'em veto it! ... Let'em go out, and continue his lying, for he is the Emperor with no clothes! ...

Perhaps, someone, like Senator Feingold, or Senator Whitehouse, can read into the record the Bush Lying Report.

Let's have Senator Kennedy, or Senator Boxer read into the record the interview in which The Commander Guy says he's passing Osama bin Laden onto the next administration.

Let's hear from Lawrence Wright, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author of The Looming Tower, on how he was wiretapped, and threatened.

The New England Patriots landed in Arizona last night, to fight for the Super Bowl.

It long past due that few patriots stand up and fight in Congress.

For all you Senators, vote against the bill, deny the immunity and let The Commander Guy piss-and-moan his way out the door in less than a year!

Protect America ... Yes, indeed ... Protect us, please!

Bonus Must Reads

Glenn Greenwald: What's at stake today in the Senate's FISA filibuster vote

Paul Kiel/TPMmuckracker: Today's Must Read

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Bush Fatigue Alert - Monday's SOTU

Did you hear that?

No, listen closely ....

That's right ... Nary a word on the upcoming production of Bush Fatigue, otherwise known as the State of the Union Address.

Boy, what a difference a Democratic-controlled Congress, 31% approval rating, the still ongoing Iraq disaster and, now, a tanking U.S. economy makes ...

I had been thinking about it, just vaguely, as this month as rolled on.

Isn't it time for the SOTU?

Last Thursday, Barry Crimmins also thought about it;

"Take a look at the MSNBC Political Calendar

24 NBC Republican debate, Florida Atlantic University, Boca Raton, Florida
26 South Carolina Democratic primary
29 Florida primary
30 Republican debate, Reagan Library, Simi Valley, California
31 Democratic debate, Los Angeles, CA

That's it for the balance of the month. Three debates and two primaries. But for you trivia fans out there, there is one other upcoming event that is generally considered extremely political yet it isn't mentioned.

If you guessed the State of the Union Address, go to the head of your home school. The reason people don't realize Bush came back from his extended trip abroad is because no one noticed him leave. The state of this presidency is obvious, which is why the next week's address has become The Super Bowl of Impertinence."
Quite right.

Past SOTU's, when the GOP orgy was in full swing, and the Bush Grindhouse in full swagger, the SOTU was trumpeted, hyped and otherwise blared across the land, making the Super Bowl look like a pee-wee flag football event.

If Nancy Pelosi had any balls (or, at least a table), when the Sargent of Arms calls out "Madam Speaker, the President of the United States", she should shout back "No, don't let him in!".

Or, to spare us all, of what, undoubtedly will be a bitch session, blaming the Democrats for everything, continuing his delusional spin (and lying) on how great things are going in Iraq (I suppose, the only sense of mystery will be how many times, if at all, he mentions Afghanistan or Pakistan), and, of course, boasting of his breadcrumbs Stimulus Package, he should mail it in.


It is not a requirement that the President deliver the SOTU live, in a joint session of Congress, merely that he deliver one to Congress.

The "Must View SOTU" didn't go all Elvis-is-in-the-building until Woodrow Wilson;
"This changed in 1913. Wilson believed the presidency was more than a impersonal institution; that instead the presidency is dynamic, alive, and personal (see Tulis). In articulating this philosophy, Wilson delivered an oral message to Congress. Heath reasons prevented Wilson from addressing Congress in 1919 and 1920, but Harding's two messages (1921 and 1922) and Coolidge's first (1923) were also oral messages. In the strict constructionist style of 19th Century presidents, Coolidge's remaining State of the Unions (1924-28) and all four of Hoover's (1929-32) were written. Franklin D. Roosevelt established the modern tradition of delivering an oral State of the Union beginning with his first in 1934. Exceptions include Truman's 1st (1946) and last (1953), Eisenhower's last (1961), Carter's last (1981), and Nixon's 4th (1973). In addition, Roosevelt's last (1945) and Eisenhower's 4th (1956) were technically written messages although they addressed the American people via radio summarizing their reports. Any research design should recognize these facts."
So, on Monday evening, go back into your Hurricane Katrina mode, Mr. The Commander Guy, and just stay away.

Bonus SOTU Riffs

Notes from the Uber Rally ... Err, the State of the Union (The very first Garlic post)

White House Besieged With Would-Be Energy Inventors As Bush Backtracks From Pledge; All Looking To Cash In On President's New Energy Initiative - If Only President Meant It

Of Daydreams, Lies, Libby and The State of the Union ... Chopped Garlic ... Yes, Where Is The Intelligence - Both Literally and Figuratively?

Deadline Looms For Axis of Evil Applicants; White House Cramming To Fill List For State of Union Address; Is Considering Adding Individuals For First Time

Coming To A Theatre Near You Soon! - Republicans On A Plane ! ...Not Even Al-Qaeda-Types Can Handle it!

Not only the most evil vice president in history, but also the greatest ventriloquist of all-time?

Neocon Dolphins? ... Say It Ain't So, Flipper!

This was a rather jarring headline that caught my eye yesterday;

Killer dolphins baffle marine experts

Say what? ... Killer dolphins?

Was The World Weekly News back in business?

After quickly looking, to see if this was, in any way, emanating out of Fox News (it wasn't, it's from, I felt it had some credibility.

New evidence has been compiled by marine scientists that prove the normally placid dolphin is capable of brutal attacks both on innocent fellow marine mammals and, more disturbingly, on its own kind.

Confirmation of the murders came by way of two shocking films shot by holidaymakers.

The first was initially believed to show a dolphin fishing for salmon - until closer examination revealed a relentless attack on a porpoise, its body spinning round with such force that its back was broken and its soft tissue shattered.

Marine experts now believe that these displays of attacks on non-rival, non-predatory, peace-loving porpoises and, more shockingly, of dolphin infanticide, may have always taken place.

Say it ain't so, Flipper!

What about all those water park shows, with chippering, playful dolphins jumping through hoops, and having little toddlers placed on their backs? ... Is this just a ruse, a seduction, sucking us in before the big attack?

Will Shamu protest, demanding to keep top billing? Or demand protection?

Do we now have to face having a breed of Neocon Dolphins?

Dolphins that attack for no reason ... Dolphins making preemptive attacks on innocents ...

Now, we know the Bush Grindhouse once wanted to deploy polar bears in Iraq, have they been secretly training, breeding these killer dolphins? Are they the unheralded components of The Commander Guys' unbelievable successful surge?

Is Cheney's office, or the Joint Chiefs of Staff, burning the midnight oil, toiling over how to get all the Iranians in the water, so the dolphins can do their work?

Will there be a kipper-tape parade down 5th Avenue when they come home?

Hmmm ... Even better ... Who can beat down and save us from these renegade, killer, Neocon dolphins?

Can you smell Rambo V?

Bonus Fish Tales

Mystery of the killer dolphins

Armed and dangerous - Flipper the firing dolphin let loose by Katrina

Attack of the Killer Dolphins (Maybe)

The evolution of a dubious war hero; Rambo's a tragic victim of Vietnam, or a fierce warrior, or a reluctant invader. Whatever his audience needs from a war movie right now