Top Ten Cloves: Ways To Liven Up The Democrats' Debate This Evening

News Item: Obama, Clinton set for one-on-one face off

10. Set new rules - Since the debate is in Hollywood, make Hillary and Obama give their answers in David Mamet dialogue

9. Announce ahead of time to the audience, a secret word and then, when Hillary or Obama says it, a cartoon of a duck with a cigar drops from the ceiling with $100 bill for them

8. With work slowed down due to the Writer's Strike, pitch in and allow stand-ins and stunt-doubles during the debate

7. Make it interactive, since it's at the Kodak Theatre, and allow regular people on stage during the debate, to snap photos, capturing their "Kodak Moment"

6. If the debate is close, as a tie-breaker, announce whoever can name the most stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame will be declared the winner

5. To ensure a bevy of YouTube posts, have them take hits of helium before, and during, the debate

4. Being that both going to do a lot of spinning, instead of chairs, tables or podiums, place Hillary and Obama for the debate in one of those giant teacups from Disneyland

3. Hire a couple of seat-fillers from the Academy Awards and toss a few questions at them

2. To eliminate the bickering, set it up like the gameshow "Twenty-One", and put Hillary and Obama in soundproofs booths so they can't hear each others answers

1. Get things settled this evening - Have them arm-wrestle for the delegates from Florida and Michigan


Bonus Debate Riffs

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To eliminate the bickering, set it up like the gameshow "Twenty-One", and put Hillary and Obama in soundproofs booths so they can't hear each others answers