The Garlic: 03/07/2010

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Our Condolences, To The Olbermann Family

Tough weekend, in the Death Business.

We just discovered that Theodore Olbermann, father of MSNBC's Keith Olbermann, passed away today, after an extended illness, following what had been successful colon surgery.

My father died, in the city of his birth, New York, at 3:50 EST this afternoon

He was my inspiration, and will always remain so. His bravery these last six months cannot be measured. He is as much my hero now, as he was when I was five years old.

Early in The Garlic's history, we often featured Olbermann's rants, his "Special Comments", unique at that time, as he sought to bring to the attention of the American Public the lies, crimes and misdemeanors, of the Court Appointed President.

More recently, he used his pulpit, to shake his fist at the spineless Congress, and the Right Wing Freak Show, using his father's situation, to highlight the need for comprehensive healthcare reform;

Drew Grant: Keith Olbermann Discusses Father, “Life Panels”

Ron Chusid: An American Cry For Help

Our condolences, to the Olbermann Family

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Friday, March 12, 2010

Another Piece of Childhood Gone ...RIP Merlin Olsen

When I heard the news of his death late last evening, I immediately thought about the three, or four, generations that would only know of Merlin Olsen from his role on "Little House on the Prairie".

Or, maybe. those incongruous FTD commercials.

Those of us slightly older, have a whole different recollection.

Merlin Olsen; Fearsome Foursome anchor became TV actor and NBC commentator

Merlin Olsen, the Hall of Fame tackle who anchored the Los Angeles Rams’ Fearsome Foursome, the line that glamorized defensive play in the NFL, died early yesterday at a hospital in Duarte, Calif. He was 69.

His brother Orrin announced his death, saying Mr. Olsen had been treated for mesothelioma, a form of cancer.

Mr. Olsen was also a longtime color commentator for NBC’s pro football and Rose Bowl telecasts, working with Dick Enberg, and he acted on television, most prominently as the very large and bearded Jonathan Garvey in NBC’s “Little House on the Prairie’’ and in his own series, “Father Murphy.’’

The Rams of the mid-1960s were renowned for defensive linemen who earned a collective nickname a decade before the Pittsburgh Steelers’ Steel Curtain.

[snip]

Mr. Olsen believed that the Fearsome Foursome could have excelled in any era.

“What made the Foursome unique, I think, is that we could have fit in extremely comfortably in the modern game,’’ he told The Orange County Register in 1997. He estimated that the line’s average weight was 275 pounds and said that “there was not a weight lifter in the group.’’

“Imagine how big we’d be today,’’ he added.

“We could all run,’’ Mr. Olsen said. “The other thing we had going for us was a rare chemistry. There was also a very special kind of unselfishness.’’

As a youth in the 1960's, despite growing up in Boston, the lowly AFL, and woeful Boston Patriots, were not on our radar.

We were NFL, baby, all the way.

And, after a brief flirt, with the mid-60's Dallas Cowboys (chiefly due to Chuck Howley, Bob Lily and, at the time, the world's fastest human, Bob Hayes), the Los Angeles Rams became our favorite team, and specifically due to the legendary "Fearsome Foursome" that Merlin Olsen helped anchor.

Olsen, Deacon Jones, Rosey Grier (who would, in 1968, be on the tragic scene, as one of Bobby Kennedy's bodyguards) and Lamar Lundy, there wasn't a better front defensive four in the game, and along with movie-star-looks QB Roman Gabriel, RB Dick Bass, and receivers like Bernie Casey (another LA Ram who would go on to a film and television career), and Jack Snow, the Rams of the late 1960's and very early 1970's were poised to go all the way.

But the brass ring, the newly-created Super Bowl, eluded the LA Rams, thwarted by a new rival out of the frozen tundra, the Minnesota Vikings, and their soon-to-be-legendary front four, the Purple People Eaters (though, the Vikings would go on to lose four Super Bowls).

Whether you remember Olsen as "Jonathan Garvey", or one of the Fearsome Foursome that terrified NFL quarterbacks, it's a sad day, another piece from the childhood memory block chipped away.

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Thursday, March 11, 2010

Quote of the Day!

When Vice President Joe Biden returns home, from his humiliating visit to Israel, the White House chef should cook him up a big ol' ham steak, to go with the egg on his face.

Juan Cole has the Quote of the Day, in his "Abbas Reported to have Withdrawn from Israeli-Palestinian talks; Obama Mideast Policy Sabotaged by Netanyahu";

Since 1949, the US has given Israel over $100 billion in direct aid, and the indirect forms of aid are orders of magnitude greater. That the vice president of the United States (and therefore the president himself) were ambushed by the prime minister in this arrogant and nearly sadistic manner raises the severest questions about why US taxpayer money should flow in such enormous amounts to a country that is actively and on a massive scale violating the Hague Agreement of 1907 and the Fourth Geneva Convention of 1949 on the treatment of populations by occupiers. And this at a time when the US budget deficit is ballooning and there is not enough government money to take care of the needs of US citizens. The argument that Israel is a security asset for the United States is undermined if the Israelis are provoking enmity toward the United States among 1.5 billion Muslims by their inexorable annexation of Palestinian land and daily oppression of the Palestinian people.

[snip]

Obama is in real danger of seeing his allies lose respect for the United States once they see that Israel can treat him in this humiliating way with impunity. The security implications for the US are enormous. Many European allies feel strongly that Israel is an aggressor state in the region, and when Obama asks them for help in the fight against al-Qaeda, they may feel that Washington's coddling of Israeli colonialism produced much of the radicalism that they are now asked to spend blood and treasure combating. Moreover, many leaders may be emboldened to treat Obama and Biden just as Netanyahu did, if the latter faces no consequences for his impudence.

To embellish this circus, maybe they can make Eric Massa the new Ambassador to Israel.

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Wednesday, March 10, 2010

An Eric Massa Cloud

Tickle Fights?... Favorite Song - In The Navy? ... "The sexual tension between Glenn Beck and Eric Massa is palpable"...Crossing The Line - Shellbacks and Pollywags ... Favorite TV Show - Bachelor Father? ... Groping Male Staffers... Cancer ... "You need any help with that, let me know" ...The Democratic Leadership Made Me Do It... Snorkling ... Do you know how awkward it is to have a political argument with a naked man?...

Oh, we could go on-and-on, piling on this riveting, public meltdown.

So, rather, we will turn it over to another - Barry Crimmins.

Crimmins' "Ticklish Times in NY-29" is hysterical, a complete rundown, but I can't say "soup-to-nuts" with this story, without breaking out in a huge grin;

That was Saturday night. On Sunday he went on his radio show and tried to explain himself. It got mighty weird. He told of how when men sleep in the same bed together they should sleep one man under a sheet, the other over it. This method helps avoid any accidental sexual contact. How about flipping a coin and the loser gets the floor, Eric? The Three Stooges were the last guys I can think of who could sleep in the same bed free of sexual overtones.

Then he told of how he ended up at a table with all 15 of the "bachelors" on his congressional staff at the end of a drunken wedding party. Massa, by the way, uses the word "bachelor" more often than a 50's movie about marriage-averse single men. Before long and due to his own loopy disclosures, it became obvious that he seeks the company of bachelors more often than say, Clifton Webb.

There's a lot more ...

Go read "Ticklish Times in NY-29"

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Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Breaking News: Costa Rican Legislature Convenes Emergency Session To Ban Limbaugh

Country United In Not Wanting Right Wing Hatemonger; OAS Sends Out Advisory Calling for Similar Action

Even though it may not occur for five-years, Costa Rica is not taking any chances, its' legislature convening in an emergency session today, voting unanimously to ban controversial radio clown Rush Limbaugh from entering the country, or, otherwise establishing "any type of domestic residency," as he has stated he may do.

President Óscar Arias quickly signaled his endorsement of the vote, citing "the protection of our citizens from this drug-addict hatemonger is our utmost concern."

The country's Judiciary branch, the Supreme Court, in an unusual, and non-scheduled session, also voted unanimously, that the bill passed by the legislature is valid, and completely legal and, in strongly worded language, stated it would "not entertain any challenges" to the ruling.

Limbaugh, on his radio program yesterday, continuing to bash the pending healthcare reform package in Congress, vowed, if the bill passes, he will leave the country.

Think Progress has the details;

CALLER: If the health care bill passes, where would you go for health care yourself? And the second part of that is, what would happen to the doctors, do they have to participate in the federal program, or could they opt out of it? [...]

LIMBAUGH: My guess in even in Canada and even in the UK, doctors have opted out. And once they’ve opted, they can’t see anybody Medicare, Medicaid, or what will become the exchanges. They have to have a clientele of private patients that will pay them a retainer and it’ll be a very small practice. I don’t know if that’s been outlawed in the Senate bill. I don’t know. I’ll just tell you this, if this passes and it’s five years from now and all that stuff gets implemented — I am leaving the country. I’ll go to Costa Rica/

In a developing related matter, the Organization of American States (OAS) issued an rare advisory to its' member nations, urging them to adopt, and pass, similar legislation as Costa Rica.

In the advisory, Secretary General of the Organization of American States (OAS), José Miguel Insulza stated it should be "our goal to keep this racist, cheeseburger-that-sweats, wind bag out of our hemisphere."

In a flash survey conducted by The Garlic, over 89% of Limbaugh's Dittoheads contacted believed that "Costa Rica" was a "new, discount department store for Illegal Aliens" and over 65% wanted to know of the closest one in their area.

Bonus Limbaugh Riffs

NFL Singing Rush's Tune?

Jesus, It Sounded Like A Violation of the Rico Act!

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