10. Guess which Ivy League school doesn't have to pay for its' heating oil anymore as long as a certain student gets all "A's"?
9. He gets to meet Ali McGraw, but no commitments that "Love Story, The Sequel" will come out of it
8. Camel Racing is now a new Ivy League sport
7. Harvard will develop new, state-of-art, robotic jockeys for the camel racing
6. Harvard will put all their best brains to work on figuring out how EuroDisney can make money
5. No more Weidner; It's now called the "Prince Alwaleed Bin Talal" Library
4. He can fill Harvard Yard with as much sand as he wants
3. Respects Harvard President Larry Summer's views on woman
2. Gets to give the Bush Family shit whenever Harvard beats Yale
1. To be able to say "I pahked my cah in Hahvid Yahd" without a trace of accent
9. He gets to meet Ali McGraw, but no commitments that "Love Story, The Sequel" will come out of it
8. Camel Racing is now a new Ivy League sport
7. Harvard will develop new, state-of-art, robotic jockeys for the camel racing
6. Harvard will put all their best brains to work on figuring out how EuroDisney can make money
5. No more Weidner; It's now called the "Prince Alwaleed Bin Talal" Library
4. He can fill Harvard Yard with as much sand as he wants
3. Respects Harvard President Larry Summer's views on woman
2. Gets to give the Bush Family shit whenever Harvard beats Yale
1. To be able to say "I pahked my cah in Hahvid Yahd" without a trace of accent
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