Weekend Special - Sautéed Cloves 9 July 2006

A major rift has developed between Warren Buffett and Bill and Melinda Gates, after the Gates read the fine print of the mammoth donation Buffet made, leaving the bulk of his money to the Gates Foundation The donation, as it turns out, is not money, but in Dairy Queen products















Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling denied reports that Potter will be killed in the final book of the series and emphatically put to rest rumors that Potter will be killed by U.S. Marines, on routine patrol in Iraq


















In a desperate measure to gain momentum against his Democratic rival Bob Casey, Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA) proposed this week to conscript Lassie to military service and tell the famous canine that "Timmy is stuck in the warehouse with the WMD's in Iraq", as a means to find the weapons that justified the U.S. invasion and occupation Santorum insists are still to be discovered


Following the latest news of a terrorist plot to bomb New York City trains and tunnels, Mayor Michael Bloomberg immediately offered to go around the city and "test the food", to be sure it wasn't contaminated





















Google, with a strong penchant for designing and building their own equipment, announced plans to build a "new stock market" from scratch.

Google indicated only Google stock will be listed and it will constantly be at an all-time high

Author Doris Kearns Goodwin said that, in her research for 'Team of Rivals - The Political Genuis of Abraham Lincoln" she discovered a team of Lincoln stunt doubles, however, ironically, on the evening of April 14, 1865, they all had the night off


In his will, convicted former Enron Chairman Ken Lay left the remains of his estate to his family, and the second set of Enron books to convicted colleague Jeff Skilling, which the will notes that "Jeff knows what to do with them"