News Item: First lady, Jenna Bush to write children's book
10. Not worried about it being good, after all, you go with the book you have, not the book you might have or wish to have at a later time
9. Plans on printing book on recycled paper, just to get "Al Gore and all those global warming wing nuts off our backs"
8. Instant bestseller - Has President write new Signing Statement, making it mandatory for everyone to purchase book
7. Thinking about having a classmate of main character who lies all the time and will base it on Crony General Alberto Gonzales
6. Will adhere to proper spelling, since, "And many books are stable ahh..now. But, of course, what we see in books is the one misspelled word a day that discourages everybody."
5. Lynne Cheney will be badgering them to put in a "steamy lesbian scene"
4. Story is about a "second-grade boy who doesn't like to read" ... Absolutely not based on the President
3. Mitt Romney has already announced he won't be upset if his sons don't read the book
2. Jenna will write that boys' teacher goes on wild, drunken South American trip during spring vacation
1. Brings up the whole My Pet Goat' business
The Laura Bush Bummer Bombing-of-the Day