Wednesday 6 April 2005

Aliens Jam Arizona Border
Many Disappointed With 'Historic' Minuteman

If the United States had a fan club, Rafael Chenzo would likely be its' president.

The 19-year-old undocumented immigrant is a U.S. History buff. He is particularly interested in the Colonial period and has aspirations to visit Boston, to see all the important sites that shaped American history, the one's he has read about since he was a small child.

Chenzo was one of the tens-of-thousands who flocked to the Arizona border on Monday, not to illegally enter the United States, but to view the "historic' Minutemen. Many wanted to have their picture taken with a Minuteman; others brought tattered history text books to get autographs.

"I was very disappointed", offered Chenzo, through an interpreter. "They all looked like cowboys. Nobody was wearing blue coats, red coats … There were no muskets and no horses. They all had big cars or pick-up trucks".

The controversial army of self-appointed border guards are part of the Minutemen Project, led by Jim Gilchrest. Mainly recruited from the Internet, the Minutemen have volunteered to patrol the U.S. borders in an effort to augment the undermanned federal agencies. They choose the Arizona border due, chiefly, to Arizona's 'Open Carry' law, permitting the project member to be armed.

The U.S. Border Patrol and Arizona officials have distanced themselves from the project, saying they do not need the volunteers and fearful of potential outbreaks of violence.

Gilchrist has countered that it is within their constitutional rights to assemble and that the group is peaceful, has no plans to engage the illegal immigrants. The Minuteman patrol the border in shifts and radio the Border Patrol with coordinates if and when they discover any attempted border crossings.

It was rumored yesterday that Karen Hughes, Undersecretary of State for Public Diplomacy, was in talks with Gilchrist. Hughes has a mandate to improve the image of the United States and was said to have received a call from Mexican President Vincente Fox to intervene in the matter.

Hughes flew in from Europe late last night, where she was beginning her International Tupperware program (The Garlic, 29 March 2005) and had no comment.

Meanwhile, Rafael Chenzo remains hopeful.

"Perhaps they can, at least, wear the three-cornered hats".



Pope Mourners Protest Fees
Claim TicketMaster Overcharging

The scores-of-thousands who are traveling to Rome, to pay respects to the late Pope John Paul II, are beginning to protest the high 'convenience fee's' charged by TicketMaster.

It's being reported that over 18,000 pilgrims, per-hour, are viewing the Pope, lying in state in St. Peter's Basilica. The Vatican had contracted TicketMaster to handle the expected crowds. While there is no-charge for the tickets, TicketMaster is charging a 'convenience fee' of 28,000 lira (roughly $20-U.S.).

The Vatican defended the ticketing policy, citing the expected surge in pilgrims, from all over the world, coming to Rome. Officials say it could reach as high as 4-million, the same size as the population of Rome. While they don't want to turn anyone away, the Vatican officials did feel the need to have a organized system for such an overwhelming crowd.

There have been unconfirmed reports that ticket scalping has been flourishing. Italian ticket brokers are using small children and the elderly to stand in line, holding a place for a ticket holder, charging as high as 300,000 lira. Other reports have the Italian Police running a scam of bringing people in to the Basilica via a side entrance and collecting a fee for such service.

TicketMaster offered no comment beyond saying that convenience fees were a standard practice. They also denied any involvement with the ticket scalping or issuing complimentary tickets to the Italian Police.

TicketMaster did confirm that the Vatican receives 10,000 lira for each ticket issued and cited again that this is standard practice with organizers and promoters.