Monday 2 May 2005

Runaway Bride Influenced By Ad Campaign
Disappointed it "didn't stay in Vegas"; Vows Never To Return

Jennifer Wilbanks, the runaway Georgia bride, was strongly influence, and disappointed, by the advertising campaign, ''What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas', according to sources close to the investigation.

Wilbanks took off last Tuesday, just days before her pending marriage to fiancé, John Mason. She later admitted that she had 'cold feet' and boarded a bus in Georgia and headed to Las Vegas. After spending some time in Las Vegas, she took another bus to Albuquerque, N.M., as she sought to avoided the 600-guest wedding, which included 14 bridesmaids and ushers.

A source close to the investigation in Albuquerque leaked portions of the interrogation to The Garlic. In this passage, Wilbanks indicates she was strongly influenced by the Vegas ad campaign.

Speaking to Albuquerque detectives, Wilbanks said;

"I was scared, confused … I knew if I could get to Las Vegas, I would be safe … Nobody would say anything - just like in the commercial … It wouldn't go anywhere … Nobody would say anything …"

Wilbanks went on to describe that, in a coffee shop, in talking about her plight with the waitress, the server allegedly told her boss, who came over to Wilbanks and advocated she call home. Ms. Wilbanks stated she was devastated that her secret was told and fled the coffee shop.

The ad campaign, created for the Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority by of R&R Partners, a local Las Vegas ad house, depicts in it's campaign scenarios of a boxer and his manager and, ironically, another with a bachelorette party. All the spots conclude with the tagline, “What happens in Vegas… Stays in Vegas.”

It's to say that Vegas as a place that is “commitment-free, pressure-free, judgment-free,” according to Billy Vassiliadis, chief executive of R&R Partners.

According to the investigation source, it seems that Wilbanks is more upset about Las Vegas not keeping her secret, than about ruining the wedding plans.

"She told the Albuquerque detectives that she'll never go to Las Vegas again".

There are calls, in both Georgia and Albuquerque, to charge Ms. Wilbanks. Albuquerque Police Chief Ray Schulz said charges are unlikely and that Ms. Wilbanks is 'a person in crisis'

In Gwinnett County, Georgia, District Attorney Danny Porter is looking at possible charges of reporting a crime that didn't exist.

In Washington, Sen. Rick Santorum (R-PA) said in an interview that Congress should look into this ad campaign.

"It's not beneficial to have television and ad agencies influencing people to commit crimes. I have been a strong supporter of protecting families and preserving family values. As the father of six children, I know that raising a family can be a struggle and the undo influence of liberal, sin-spouting television commercials have no place in our homes"

Santorum indicated he will look to form a committee to hold hearing on the 'What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas' ad campaign to "see if any other crimes have been committed"


First Lady Takes Swipes At Husband, Staff
White House Dinner Audience "uncomfortable' with jibes

First Lady Laura Bush, under cover of the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, took hard-hitting swipes at her husband, President Bush, as well as Vice President Cheney, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and other cabinet members, staff and those in the audience

The harshness of the jibes took many in the audience by surprise.

Mrs. Bush opened up by greeting the audience with "Looks like Bill Bennett lost another bet - I'm up here at the podium"

She then apologized the absence of the Vice President.

"I'm sorry Dick Cheney isn't here - he's in his secret bunker, working … No rest for the weary - or those planning the invasion of Iran"

Spotting Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld sitting with Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, Mrs. Bush noted;

"How would you like to be in a room with those two - if they ever went on 'Law and Order', it would be 'bad cop-bad cop' …"

The First Lady dispelled the constant rumors that her husband doesn't read books.

"He's read two or three of the Harry Potter series …And he likes to think of himself as a, sort of, magician … But of course, we all know what he's doing in Iraqi is just smoke and mirrors …"

"He recently told me he wants to read 'The DiVinci Code' but asked if it comes with a decoder ring …"

The First Lady went on to take swipes at NBC newswoman Andrea Mitchell ("only bride she knows who's registry offered senior citizen discounts"), Senator Bill Frist (he couldn't come tonight, his lips are chapped from kissing so many conservative Christian asses last week) to her recent appearance on the 'Tonight Show, with Jay Leno' ("My God, Leno's chin was the size of Mount Rushmore").

Many in the audience, a combination of high powered politicians, media moguls, television and film personalities, became noticeably uncomfortable as the First Lady rolled on. She nearly bumped the featured comedian of the evening, Cedric, The Entertainer, delaying his appearance by more than 17-minutes.

Offered one attendee, a magazine publisher who wished to remain anonymous;

"Either she had alittle too much wine, or we're seeing the debut of a new Laura Bush"