The Wide Stance Stands

Just in case you missed it, the "C'mon Down, Price Is Right Governor of Illinois" wasn't the only hot political news today.

Our toe-tapping, airport-bathroom-cruising, "I'm not gay" gay former Senator, Larry Craig cracked into the headlines.

Court denies Sen. Craig's effort to withdraw sex-sting plea

The Minnesota Court of Appeals on Tuesday rejected U.S. Sen. Larry Craig's effort to withdraw his guilty plea to a misdemeanor offense of disorderly conduct in connection with a sex-sting operation.

After the incident became public, he attempted to withdraw his plea, contending that his "wide stance" had been misinterpreted by the arresting officer and that he had pleaded guilty simply to get the matter over with.

Ohhhhhh, what a shame ...

However, if the original incident didn’t provide us with enough riches, his appeal managed to top them.

From Steve Benen;

In an especially entertaining development, it appears Craig's attorneys argued that the senator's foot tapping in the stall should be protected as free speech under the First Amendment. The court, believe it or not, did not find this persuasive: "[E]ven if appellant's foot-tapping and the movement of his foot towards the undercover officer's stall are considered 'speech,' they would be intrusive speech directed at a captive audience, and the government may prohibit them."

Ooooookay ...

That strikes a blow (no pun intended) for all the bathroom cruisers.

Your vocal-less pick-up attempts are not constitutionally protected.

But wait, as they say, there's more.

It seems that the I'm-Not-Gay-Gay-Senator Craig burned through the office petty cash draw.

From Jeralyn, at TalkLeft;

CNN notes the Senate Ethics Committee letter of admonition to Craig:

The committee also criticized Craig for using more than $200,000 from campaign funds to pay legal fees related to his case and for flashing his Senate business card at the officer who arrested him. The letter said that move could be seen as an improper attempt to receive "special and favorable treatment."

I believe, we will use our post This Is Just Too, Too Rich ... here, and just substitute the name "Larry Craig" for "Bill Clinton".

Senator Larry Craig (R-ID) Chastises Bill ...




To help you refresh your memory of this case, from earlier, on The Garlic

Top Ten Cloves: Things About Admitting You Have A Wide Stance

Breaking News! Another Bombshell - Craig To Enter Rehab; Cites Suffering From 'Restroom Leg Syndrome'

''Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in ... another stall.''

Mitch McConnell, and the Republican Leadership must be burning overtime this evening ... Photoshopping Larry Craig with a couple of Congressional Pages .... They'll be taking off the gloves and piling up bodies ...

This is not what they wanted, when they Thunderdomed the Idaho lawmaker/breaker last week;

UPDATED 7:25 p.m. -- Craig may not quit after all if he's cleared of charges, spokesman says

This is going to be soooo, soooo good to watch ...

Bonus Restroom Leg Syndrome Links

Top Ten Cloves: Things About Admitting You Have A Wide Stance

This Is Just Too, Too Rich ...

Breaking News! Another Bombshell - Craig To Enter Rehab; Cites Suffering From 'Restroom Leg Syndrome'

Breaking News! Another Bombshell - Craig To Enter Rehab; Cites Suffering From 'Restroom Leg Syndrome'

Beleaguered Republican Idaho Senator, Larry Craig, issued a statement this morning, following up on his "I am not gay" admission yesterday, indicating he will begin rehab treatment for "Restroom Leg Syndrome".

Craig did not divulge the rehab facility he will enter, nor state how long he has been inflicted with Restroom Leg Syndrome.

Nor was anything mentioned to the political future of Senator Craig, and how his treatment for Restroom Leg Syndrome would affect his ability to continue serving in office.

A spokesperson for Craig's Senate office needed to clarify, and confirm, for reporters that the Senator was not speaking on the more popular "Restless Leg Syndrome".

Restless legs syndrome (RLS, or Wittmaack-Ekbom's syndrome) "is a condition that is characterized by an irresistible urge to move one's legs. It is poorly understood [citation needed], often misdiagnosed, and believed to be a neurological disorder."

The Craig spokesperson hinted that the intense media attention over Senator Craig could be the cause, or trigger, of his RRLS.

In his statement, Craig stated that RRLS has "inflicted and burdened me, off-and-on, for years."

Neither Craig, nor his office, would respond to follow-up questions on how his "Restroom Leg Syndrome" differed, or was distinct from, "Restless Leg Syndrome".

Nor would anyone associated with Senator Craig respond to speculation that his "Restroom Leg Syndrome" came out of a conference call with the Republican Leadership, after they announced they were referring Craig's Minneapolis public restroom arrest to the Senate Ethics Committee.

There were reports circulating around Capitol Hill that former Tennessee Senator, Dr. Bill Frist, contacted Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, after viewing videotape of Craig's "I'm not gay" press conference, with the diagnosis.

"Frist was very certain," a source close to the Senate told The Garlic, "that is was very clear from the videotape Craig suffered from Restroom Leg Syndrome."

According to the source, Frist indicated that Craig "certainly seems to respond to the visual stimuli that characterizes Restroom Leg Syndrome."

Frist is said to have told the Republican Leadership that "having a wide stance" is also one of the symptoms associated with Restroom Leg Syndrome, but would need to see additional videotape to confirm that diagnosis.

The Garlic, in a search prior to posting this report, has yet to find a rehab facility that specializes in Restroom Leg Syndrome, and neither Craig's office, or the Senate Republican Leadership responded to inquires to identify such a rehab facility.

"I thought I had it under control," continued Craig, in his statement. "It's a bad disease ... A naughty disease ... It's a bad, nasty, naughty disease."

In a related matter, fellow Republican and Craig colleague, Senator David Vitters (R-LA), is expected to hold a news conference later today, to announce a change in his story, that he was too embarrassed to admit that he suffers from "Escort Service Leg Syndrome".

Bonus Restroom Leg Syndrome Links

Barry Crimmins: Today's Monolithic Headlines

The Sleuth - Mary Ann Akers: Senator Sang for Charity a Day After Arrest









It was announced today that Senator Larry Craig will enter rehab, for treatment on his "Restroom Leg Syndrome"