10. Bat boys are bigger than Jose Canseco
9. Haven't received a congressional subpoena in weeks
8. Hitting and scoring is down; Pitchers now have lob ball in underhand
7. Barry Bonds is down to just sulking, and hissing at the media
6. No more dirty syringes on the locker room floor
5. It now takes two players to hold the bat
4. Mark McGwire is talking again
3. Fans are doing steroids now; One recently had a fight with Gary Sheffield in Fenway Park
2. Only grandslam sluggers seen recently are at Denny's
1. Any player caught giving another player a shot in the ass, well, that's something entirely different
9. Haven't received a congressional subpoena in weeks
8. Hitting and scoring is down; Pitchers now have lob ball in underhand
7. Barry Bonds is down to just sulking, and hissing at the media
6. No more dirty syringes on the locker room floor
5. It now takes two players to hold the bat
4. Mark McGwire is talking again
3. Fans are doing steroids now; One recently had a fight with Gary Sheffield in Fenway Park
2. Only grandslam sluggers seen recently are at Denny's
1. Any player caught giving another player a shot in the ass, well, that's something entirely different
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