Top Ten Cloves: Other Unannounced Measures White House Has For Pandemic Flu Draft Response Plan

News Item: Draft Report Outlines Plans for Pandemic

10. Since it worked in Iraq, after getting vaccinated, people will have to dip finger in purple ink

9. Just so media knows in advance, all exclusive scoops about pandemic flu go to Fox News first

8. So Sean Hannity doesn’t get riled up, all school buses will be used in case evacuations are necessary

7. Vice President Dick Cheney does have a chemical-biological suit, but he has no plans to share it with anyone

6. Anyone that gets the pandemic flu will receive $100 Rebate from U.S. Government

5. After Illegal Immigration and Border Security solved, will build special “Pandemic Flu Wall” around country

4. White House incorporating into plan Tom Cruise’s suggestion for silent Pandemic Flu Treatment

3. President Bush strongly believes that Iran is involved in Pandemic Flu, so he may have to make a preemptive strike on them

2. Coincidently, CIA has intelligence Iran has aluminum tubes that are used for creating Pandemic Flu

1. Right after Pandemic Flu Draft Response Plan released, President Bush issuing Signing Statement, exempting him from following it