Sunday, February 11, 2007

Weekend Special - Sautéed Cloves 11 February 2007

Actor Daniel Radcliffe said that after appearing in the stage production of 'Equus', sans clothing, that he has been lobbying author J.K. Rowling to rewrite the final Harry Potter book, with "Harry not wearing any clothes".

Said Radcliffe, "we could demonstrate, quite well, that Harry is no longer a little boy and we could generate an entire new audience to keep the series going."

Coincidentally, former New Life Church pastor Ted Haggard, who announced last week that, after an intensive three-week program, he is now "completely heterosexual", is reported, after seeing Radcliffe's performance, to have contacted Rowling, also suggesting that she rewrite Harry Potter so that Radcliffe can appear in future Potter movies in the nude.

Former Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz said he backs President Bushs' new surge policy, and his continued threats against Iran.

Said Wolfewitz, "If you simply reuse the material we had for the build-up to invading Iraq, the run-up to war with Iran should pay for itself"

Lt. General David Petraeus
frustrated lawmakers at a recent hearing , when asked how much longer he sees U.S. troops in Iraq, motioned with his hands, saying "This much"

With the evidence, to-date, in the trial of former Assistant to the President, and Vice President Chief of Staff I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby detailing a much deeper and hands-on role by Vice President Cheney, The Garlic has obtained a photograph entered into evidence, of Cheney in the his office, on a typical work day

Senator Barak Obama, who, yesterday announced his candidacy for president, said if people want to make his race an issue, that he would expect "fair play" and that "the other candidates be charged with not being white enough."

Obama added, that in the case of New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson, Richardson "would have to decide on either not being white enough, or not being Hispanic enough"

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