10. To see if people are really reading the paper, run all San Francisco-based stories
9. Printing the daily edition on colored construction paper
8. To get readers back, rerun all the O.J. Simpson trial coverage
7. Send a videotape of the paper to Bill Frist and see if he can see what's wrong with it
6. As soon as the ankle bracelet comes off, bring in Martha Stewart to redesign the paper
5. Hiring Jayson Blair
4. Getting Tom Cruise to fall in love with the paper
3. Based on the number of hits, changing its' website into a porno site
2. Recut the Paris Hilton commercial that will have her taking a break and reading the LA Times
1. Just invite readers to send in comments; That even for LA, the word "wikitorial" might have been too much
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