Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Top Ten Cloves: Ways The White House Plans On Conserving Energy

10. Hire more interns, to stand on South Lawn holding solar panels plugged into White House

9. Calls Senate Leader Frist and asks if Nuclear Option can fuel all of Washington D.C.

8. Jack Abramoff can burn his $10-bills to provide heat for the winter

7. Can't President sign Special Order, expempting White House from conservation and use all the power they want?

6. Wait for FEMA to deliver alternative-fuel generators … Wait, that's not really conserving, just FEMA screwing up

5. President to pedal stationary bike (more for his Secret Service teams' protection) to generate electricity for Oval Office

4. Karl Rove will start hand-wrting his smears

3. President to federalize Willie Nelson's vegetable oil-fueled bus for his trips to the hurricane regions

2. Start letting GOP donors sleep in Lincoln bedroom, but they have to bring heat and electricity for the whole White House

1. Dick Cheney will use his pacemaker only three-days per-week

No comments: