Israeli Pause, And No Bombs Falling, May Force Cable News To Go Dark
Look For Pump Up Of Mel Gibson Tirade To Carry Through Labor Day
Cable news executives are scrambling this morning for content and programming, after Israeli announced last night a pause in their relentless air attack of Hezbollah in Southern Lebanon for 48-Hours
This comes after world outcry, following an attack this weekend, in
Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice is claiming to have agreements that will produce a cease-fire this week, even though
“The only thing better than a cease-fire,” said one Cable News executive, who asked to remain anonymous, “is the promise or prediction of one, so we can probably milk a few days out of that ... Run the archival footage ... a full crew of talking heads ... We’ll just have to play it by the seat of our pants ...”
Fox News: “Not Enough of a Hook, Without The Bombs, To Go Wall-to-Wall”
Cable News, which has gone on with, virtually, 24-hour coverage since the escalation of violence between
Roger Ailes, chief of Fox News said that Fox may go with ‘Best Of” shows, until the action picks up again.
“There’s not enough of a hook, without the bombs falling, to go wall-to-wall with coverage,” said Ailes.
“Take the tsunami last year,” added Ailes. ‘By itself, a one, maybe two-day story ... But throw in the ex-Presidents, and with one of them named
Ailes indicated that last weeks’ rant by Fox Anchor
CNN: Some Screens Dark and Cooper Unplugged - Again
At CNN, sources tell The Garlic, that Anderson Cooper is considering staying in the Middle East and running his show, unscripted, just “off-the-cuff” talk, or do a walk around, “like he did in New Orleans”, and talk with regular people
Veteran newsman Wolf Blitzer, host of CNN’s “Situation Room” said he was optimistic.
“We cover the world on the Situation Room,” said a cautious Blitzer. “We may have to turn off a few of our big screens that are on the wall behind me, but we’ll have enough news to get through.”
For new head honcho, Dan Abrams, a cease-fire will place a huge dent in his establishing a programming schedule for
“We’re hoping for something to happen,” said a beleaguered Abrams. “I mean, we’ve had no major, ripped-from-the-headlines legal cases ... The Duke Rape Case is kind of fizzling out and there’s nothing on horizon ... Summer’s almost over and no one’s gone missing that we can sink our teeth into ... No cruise ship mayhem to report ... It’s been tough. ...”
The Passion Of Mel Gibson, Or The DNA Of Floyd Landis May Carry The Day, At Least Until Summers’ End
All the cable executives concurred that the Friday arrest of actor Mel Gibson, and his anti-Semitic remarks to police at the time of his arrest, may “have legs”.
The Academy-Award-wining Gibson was pulled over for allegedly speeding by Los Angeles County Sheriffs and the subsequent blood alcohol test revealed a 0.12 reading. The state's legal limit is .08.
Michael Stickings’ The Reaction asks “Who Would Jesus Slur ” and over at The Moderate Voice, Joe Gandelman, while denouncing the anti-Semitism, points out other blog postings defending free speech and the Gibson’s “freedom of stupidity”
And if Gibson’s foot-in-mouth doesn’t have legs, Tour de France winner Floyd Landis might have to pedal his way into the cable news hurricane to save the day.
It was announced after his crowning ceremony that the cyclist Landis tested positive for illegal substances, an abnormally high test level for the steroid testosterone.
Landis claims he is innocent and that the unusually high level of testosterone is naturally produced in his body.
“This could turn into something, said Antonio Ricci, publisher of “Pedaling Piss”, the quarterly magazine that tracks professional cycling, and all the steroid rumors, scandals and confirmations of illegal substance usage. “It’s bigger over here, in Europe, than
“If a cease-fire takes hold, than, what we could really use,” offered a news producer, “is for a famous white woman athlete, who is on record for spouting anti-Semitic remarks, and has been recently accused of taking steroids, to go missing, or feared murdered, while on a cruise ... Now that would carry us straight into the Fall Sweeps ...”
Rita Cosby won’t be Live & Direct from the