Top Ten Cloves: What It Will Take For President Bush To Brief Congress On New Wiretap Plans

News Item: Spy Court's Orders Stir Debate on Hill; Some Want Documents Made Public

10. Hilary vs. Obama... Steel-Cage Match, on the floor of the Senate

9. Getting Charlie Rangel to give Dick Cheney his Congressional office back

8. Just as soon as he gets SMU to agree to have his Presidential Library

7. Shortly after he digs up enough dirt on everyone in Congress via the illegal wiretaps

6. When Paris Hilton wins a Grammy

5. The day after Osama bin Laden is arrested

4. Too Late - Already put it in a Signing Statement that he doesn’t have to tell anyone

3. Pledge from everyone in Congress that they won't call him "stupid" anymore

2. Waiting until Pat Robertson hears back from God again

1. He's going to do what Carly Simon did... There'll be an auction and whoever puts in the most money, he'll whisper it in their ear