Top Ten Cloves: Other Ways Ralph Nader Could Have Made News Today

News Item: Nader: Obama 'talking white'

10. Get his wife to steal recipes off the Internet

9. At the end of campaign commercial, say he "didn't approve this ad" and charge there's a new conspiracy against him

8. Stage a One-Man protest at the White House, demanding President open up email from the EPA

7. Make a big fuss with McCain, and Charlie Black, and say if terrorist attacked U.S. again, his campaign will get the advantage

6. Go for the YouTube hit-of-the-day - Have Ron Paul supporters chase him through parking lot

5. Green-Screen Norm Coleman's wife into Nader campaign ads

4. Unveil new funding plan - He's going to roll up his sleeves and get working to win that McCain $300-Million Battery Prize

3. Lay claim that he is the "arrogantly cool guy at the country club" Karl Rove was talking about

2. Bombshell! ...They've talked, and Hillary will run as his VP!

1. Announce he's found a new calling - He wants to be an Ice Road Trucker!


Bonus Nader Riffs

Rocky Mountain News: Partial transcript of Ralph Nader's comments

Steve M. - No More Mister Nice Blog: RALPH NADER, GODFATHER OF SOUL

Blue Girl: Would someone give Mr. Nader a nice bowl of pudding and show him where he can take a nap?

Ralph Nader ... On The Garlic