Showing posts with label Google Day Care. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Google Day Care. Show all posts

Monday, September 19, 2011

Retro Garlic: "Google Wallet" ...We Were Close

We espied news today that Google will be introducing their long-teased "Google Wallet", an application for cellphones;

While this will be the official launch, the product itself will likely still be quite limited. The only officially compatible phone is the Nexus S 4G, which is only available on Sprint in the U.S. Google has an NFC sticker product to bring tap-and-pay to other phones, but it’s not clear if that will be ready at launch or not. Hardware to enable the payments on the merchant end is also needed. And again, MasterCard has been the only official partner on the credit card side of things so far. Perhaps Google will have more to say on that tomorrow. But the above documentation still points to PayPass-enabled Citi MasterCards as the only way to use the service for now.


It also makes sense for Google to get Wallet out there now before their next flagship Android phone, the Nexus Prime, launches next month. It too will have NFC capabilities built in and will bring the Wallet functionality to the much larger Verizon customer base.
Oh boy!


Can't wait for those news reports to pile up about these "Google Wallets" being hacked ...


And, the Retro part;


Tuesday, June 21, 2005 - Google Drops Bombshell - Will Compete With U.S. Treasury ...Markets Close Early and Troops Activated; eBay Said To Be Dumping PayPal
A day after news leaked of the 'Google Wallet', a pay system said to rival eBay's PayPal, Google late yesterday afternoon dropped a bombshell when they announced they will begin a new monetary system for the United States and compete with the U.S. Treasury.


[snip]


In a memo provided to The Garlic, by a person close to Google who wishes to remain anonymous, or would otherwise be terminated, shows that Google's money units will be called "Googlets" For higher denominations, a hyphen and Roman Numeral is added.


Ten Dollars in Googlets will be known as 'Googlets-X', $20, as "Googlets-XX, and so on. For odd denominations, a combination of Roman Numerals and regular numbers will be employed, such as $7 as 'Googlet-V2 or $23 as 'Googlet-XX3. There will be no metal coins in the Googlet Monetary System.

Oh well, we were close ...


 




Bonus Retro Garlic Google


Garlic Exclusive! ...Google Launches Search for Famed Woman Aviator


Stymied By Publishers, Google To Digitize Bazooka Joe Comics ...If Impasse Prolonged, Google To Continue With Baseball Cards, Shopping Coupons


Breaking News! Giant Search Engine Downed By GOP and RNC Staffers  ...Google Crashes! Besieged With “I’m Feeling Lucky” Searches From White House, Congress   ...Amazon, D.C. Novelty Stores Hit With Run On Magic 8-Balls


Top Ten Cloves: Other Great Things You'll Get Using Google's New Retooled Search Engine


Top Ten Cloves: Ways Google Can Provide Better Day Care


Life Imitates Art ... Or, Did Burt Lancaster Invent Google Earth?

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Top Ten Cloves: Ways Google Can Provide Better Day Care

News Item: On Day Care, Google Makes a Rare Fumble

10. Out with the "organic, natural" food and in with cheaper McDonald's Happy Meals!

9. Offset cost for parents by renting the Google Day Care kids out as focus groups

8. Make the kids generate revenue - put'em to work on the Google Phone

7. Send the kids out on the grounds of the Google Campus, collecting bugs, and then announce the new "Google Gas" (but only in Beta-Mode, fill-ups by Invite-Only)

6. Resolve Viacom dispute with own content - Start putting a daily "Best of Google Day Care Bloopers" up on YouTube

5. Hire Chuck Norris to run the program - Just his staring at it will make it perform better

4. Cut down on Waiting List and notify parents of acceptance by having them hit the "I'm Feeling Lucky" search bar

3. Weed out any of the toddlers who have been using Google Earth for "pool parties"

2. Sponsor multi-million-dollar contest - Google Day Care Preschoolers vs. John McCain, on using the Internet

1. Public Service - Have them do a group "Not Alex" commercial