Retro Garlic: "Google Wallet" ...We Were Close

We espied news today that Google will be introducing their long-teased "Google Wallet", an application for cellphones;

While this will be the official launch, the product itself will likely still be quite limited. The only officially compatible phone is the Nexus S 4G, which is only available on Sprint in the U.S. Google has an NFC sticker product to bring tap-and-pay to other phones, but it’s not clear if that will be ready at launch or not. Hardware to enable the payments on the merchant end is also needed. And again, MasterCard has been the only official partner on the credit card side of things so far. Perhaps Google will have more to say on that tomorrow. But the above documentation still points to PayPass-enabled Citi MasterCards as the only way to use the service for now.


It also makes sense for Google to get Wallet out there now before their next flagship Android phone, the Nexus Prime, launches next month. It too will have NFC capabilities built in and will bring the Wallet functionality to the much larger Verizon customer base.

Oh boy!


Can't wait for those news reports to pile up about these "Google Wallets" being hacked ...


And, the Retro part;


Tuesday, June 21, 2005 - Google Drops Bombshell - Will Compete With U.S. Treasury ...Markets Close Early and Troops Activated; eBay Said To Be Dumping PayPal

A day after news leaked of the 'Google Wallet', a pay system said to rival eBay's PayPal, Google late yesterday afternoon dropped a bombshell when they announced they will begin a new monetary system for the United States and compete with the U.S. Treasury.


[snip]


In a memo provided to The Garlic, by a person close to Google who wishes to remain anonymous, or would otherwise be terminated, shows that Google's money units will be called "Googlets" For higher denominations, a hyphen and Roman Numeral is added.


Ten Dollars in Googlets will be known as 'Googlets-X', $20, as "Googlets-XX, and so on. For odd denominations, a combination of Roman Numerals and regular numbers will be employed, such as $7 as 'Googlet-V2 or $23 as 'Googlet-XX3. There will be no metal coins in the Googlet Monetary System.

Oh well, we were close ...


 




Bonus Retro Garlic Google


Garlic Exclusive! ...Google Launches Search for Famed Woman Aviator


Stymied By Publishers, Google To Digitize Bazooka Joe Comics ...If Impasse Prolonged, Google To Continue With Baseball Cards, Shopping Coupons


Breaking News! Giant Search Engine Downed By GOP and RNC Staffers  ...Google Crashes! Besieged With “I’m Feeling Lucky” Searches From White House, Congress   ...Amazon, D.C. Novelty Stores Hit With Run On Magic 8-Balls


Top Ten Cloves: Other Great Things You'll Get Using Google's New Retooled Search Engine


Top Ten Cloves: Ways Google Can Provide Better Day Care


Life Imitates Art ... Or, Did Burt Lancaster Invent Google Earth?

Google Reciprocates ...

Earlier this month, we brought to you the news that Topeka, Kansas, in their channeling of Truth or Consequences, New Mexico, was changing their name to Google, Kansas, in an effort to land a fiber optic deal Google is rolling out.

So, today, Google CEO Eric Schmidt returned the favor;



A different kind of company name

Early last month the mayor of Topeka, Kansas stunned the world by announcing that his city was changing its name to Google. We’ve been wondering ever since how best to honor that moving gesture. Today we are pleased to announce that as of 1AM (Central Daylight Time) April 1st, Google has officially changed our name to Topeka.

[snip]

A change this dramatic won’t happen without consequences, perhaps even some disruptions. Here are a few of the thorny issues that we hope everyone in the broader Topeka community will bear in mind as we begin one of the most important transitions in our company’s history:

• Correspondence to both our corporate headquarters and offices around the world should now be addressed to Topeka Inc., but otherwise can be addressed normally.
  

• Google employees once known as “Googlers” should now be referred to as either “Topekers” or “Topekans,” depending on the result of a board meeting that’s ongoing at this hour. Whatever the outcome, the conclusion is clear: we aren’t in Google anymore.
  

• Our new product names will take some getting used to. For instance, we’ll have to assure users of Topeka News and Topeka Maps that these services will continue to offer news and local information from across the globe. Topeka Talk, similarly, is an instant messaging product, not, say, a folksy midwestern morning show. And Project Virgle, our co-venture with Richard Branson and Virgin to launch the first permanent human colony on Mars, will henceforth be known as Project Vireka.
  

• We don’t really know what to tell Oliver Google Kai’s parents, except that, if you ask us, Oliver Topeka Kai would be a charming name for their little boy.
  

• As our lawyers remind us, branded product names can achieve such popularity as to risk losing their trademark status (see cellophane, zippers, trampolines, et al). So we hope all of you will do your best to remember our new name’s proper usage:

Michael Arrington wasn't amused, but Boing Boing jumped into the spirit of things;

Also, Googlers are henceforth to be known as Topekans. Employees of Topeka who were originally from Kansas, be prepared for long, confusing conversations with your parents. No word on how this will effect stock holders. But if things go poorly, and you end up owning a hunk of the Sunflower State, the Konza Prairie is lovely this time of year. Just saying.

Additionally, Vladislav Savov, over on Engadet has a round-up of AFD hijinx, and it is hysterical.

We were rather partial to the "World's First Inflatable Lap Top" and "Real Helicopter Controlled by Nokia N900".

Happy April Fool's Day!

Bonus Google Riffs

Top Ten Cloves: Possible Reasons Google Flu Tracker Didn't Pick Up Swine Flu

Life Imitates Art ... Or, Did Burt Lancaster Invent Google Earth?

Breaking News! Giant Search Engine Downed By GOP and RNC Staffers ...Google Crashes! Besieged With “I’m Feeling Lucky” Searches From White House, Congress ...Amazon, D.C. Novelty Stores Hit With Run On Magic 8-Balls

Hmmm ... Radio Quiz Show? ... Movie? ...

Somebody needs to hip the Mayor of Topeka, Kansas, Bill Bunten, that Google has neither, a radio quiz show, nor a movie named after it;

We’re Not In Kansas Anymore. Well, We Are — Google, Kansas

Last month, Google announced plans to sell 1 gigabit-per-second fiber optic broadband to consumers. The plan called for it to be rolled out to no fewer than 50,000 homes in the initial test, and maybe as many as 500,000, but didn’t specify where it would be rolled-out. Topeka, Kansas wants in. Bad.

The city’s mayor today signed a proclamation that for the rest of the month, Topeka will be known as “Google, Kansas.” Yes, you’re reading that correctly — Topeka is now “Google.”

And, maybe, show him an atlas, or map, of New Mexico.

Something the good folks of the formerly-named Hot Springs, New Mexico, some 60-years ago, could talk to him about;

Originally named Hot Springs, the city changed its name to Truth or Consequences, the title of a popular NBC radio program. In 1950, Ralph Edwards, the host of the radio quiz show Truth or Consequences announced that he would air the program from the first town that renamed itself after the show. Hot Springs, NM won the honor. Ralph Edwards came to the town during the first weekend of May for the next fifty years. This event was called "Fiesta" and included a beauty contest, a parade, and a stage show. The city still celebrates Fiesta each year on the first weekend of May. The parade generally features area celebrities such as the Hatch Chile Queen. Fiesta also features a dance in Ralph Edwards Park.

And, they got a movie named after them, as well.

Hmmm ...

Well, this ought to help out Google's fledgling Buzz, at least in the Kansas area.

Okay, the Mayor, at least, he's lobbying for something, that super-giga-byte service.

I wonder if Larry and Serge will visit "Google, Kansas", the first week of March, for the next 50-years?

Maybe dance, with the "Google Chile Queen", in Google Park?

But wait, there's more!

This isn't Topeka's first alias;

Humorously, this isn’t the first time Topeka has tried something like this. Apparently, in August 1998, the city has a proclamation to change its name to “ToPikachu” — yes, after the Pokemon character. So this move seems roughly 100 times more sane than that one.

The people of Google, Kansas better start hitting that "I'm Feeling Lucky" bar, for the occupant of the Mayor's office not to be a raving huckster.

Who knows, if she wins the Dancing With The Stars thing, Topeka might wake up, finding itself being called "Kate-Plus-Eight", Kansas.

Google Gets Wired Today

In case you missed it, if you've done any Googling today, they have a commemorative (of sorts, well, for physics geeks, surely) logo up;



It is in honor of Hans Christian Ørsted.

Who?

From The Guardian;

Probably not even the physics geeks remember much about Hans Christian Ørsted, although Google's Doodle logo illustrates his key discovery. That is, if you run a current through a wire – in this case, from the battery at the front – then the electricity creates a magnetic field, which will deflect a compass needle.

[snip]

As with many great discoveries, it happened by accident. In 1820, Ørsted, a professor of natural philosophy at the University of Copenhagen, was preparing an evening lecture when he noticed that a compass needle moved away from magnetic north and pointed to the wire whenever current flowed from the battery.

Perhaps even more surprisingly, the compass needle pointed in the opposite direction when you flipped the battery round.

With an invisible current creating an invisible field that moved a physical needle, this caused quite a stir at the time. In London, the Royal Society gave him a medal, and he was also made a knight of the Prussian Order of Merit, of the French Legion of Honor, and the Danish Order of the Dannebrog. On his death in Copenhagen in 1851, he was given a state funeral.

[snip]

To honour Ørsted, the scientific community named the unit of magnetic induction after him, in what we now call the CGS (centimetre-gram-second) system. Sadly for him, people no longer measure things in oersteds, because nowadays we use an international metric system (SI) that honours people such as Ampere, Ohm, Hertz, James Prescott Joule, James Watt and Michael Faraday instead.

Hmmm ....

Since today is August 14th, they could have put an illustration of Rosebud.


Bonus Google Riffs

Top Ten Cloves: Possible Reasons Google Flu Tracker Didn't Pick Up Swine Flu

Life Imitates Art ... Or, Did Burt Lancaster Invent Google Earth?

Breaking News! Giant Search Engine Downed By GOP and RNC Staffers ...Google Crashes! Besieged With “I’m Feeling Lucky” Searches From White House, Congress ...Amazon, D.C. Novelty Stores Hit With Run On Magic 8-Balls

Top Ten Cloves: Things About New Google Chrome Operating System

News Item: Google developing a PC operating system that would compete with Windows

10. Based on one specific inquiry, Google Chrome OS will work in Argentina

9. Google tried to develop Sarah Palin version, but the OS kept quitting on them

8. May be a delay, in getting your computer to "invite" you to use operating system

7. Other users of Google Chrome OS can use Google Earth to read your computer screen

6. Google Chrome OS will be Twitter-Friendly, so Gmail on it limited to 140 characters, per email

5. Some super application is bound to make its way into the vernacular - "Can suck the chrome off a Google Operating System"

4. Google Chrome OS is so promising, Senator John Ensign's mother is going to buy it, and give to his ex-mistress as a gift

3. With built-in Google Flu Tracker, Chrome OS let's you know when you are sick

2. New feature on boot-up: "I'm Feeling Lucky"

1. To gain market-share, Google issuing a special edition Michael Jackson Chrome OS, that will run endlessly, and come with automated Diprivan dispenser


Bonus Links

Elise Ackerman: Google's Chrome OS a direct shot across Microsoft's bow

Michael Arrington - Google Chrome: Redefining The Operating System

Joe Trippi: Google announces netbook OS. What next?

MG Siegler: Google Drops A Nuclear Bomb On Microsoft. And It’s Made of Chrome

Google: Introducing the Google Chrome OS

Why Should You Feel Lucky Today?

Who says today is a lucky day? ... Why should you feel lucky today, and not me? ... What are they, just handing out luck? ... Anybody can be lucky, is that what you're telling me?

It's not exactly news that you can find, virtually, anything out on the World Wide Web.

So, if you happen to be Orthodox Jewish, that means you have your very own Google.

Or, to be correct, Koogle!



We espied this gem, out on Open Salon, from Luland Phoebe;

Shalom Kosher Koogle

What to do you if you are a devoutly religious ultra-Orthodox Jew, one of 800,000 or so in Israel and Rabbinic laws have forbidden you from surfing the great satan internet? How are you going to buy that new Tallit from Lands End Talit.com?

Fortunately, the Rabbis came up with a gem of an idea. Meet Kosher Google Koogle.

Koogle will not allow you to venture to places where one can look at women in immodest attire. You can't purchase items that are verboten. Koogle will not allow you to buy anything on the Sabbath. It just won't work. Kind of like having an itty- bitty little Rabbi on your shoulder at all times. That shouldn't scare anyone at all.

[snip]

So this begs the question. Where are these truly utra-Orthodox Jews using these forbidden computers if they are not allowed to own one?

And, no, it doesn't appear that there is a "I'm Feeling Lucky" box.


More Koogle

Koogle, a kosher Google, launches

Nothing can be posted on Saturdays, the Jewish Sabbath, as Jews are banned from all types of work and business activity. If Koogle users attempt to search for an item or post a message on the Sabbath, it crashes and won’t let you.

The label ‘Koogle’ is a play on the name of a Jewish noodle pudding dish, known as kugel, and Google, the search market leader.

Israeli company launches kosher search engine Koogle

Koogle is not a filter for surfers who want to access secular websites. Rather, it is a compilation of Israeli resources deemed inoffensive by the administrators. It includes news, business directories and links to realtors, kosher restaurants, hotels as well as mohels, or ritual circumcisers, and rehab centers.

Kosher Google Makes Debut as Koogle

Koogle also was the brand name for a flavored peanut butter marketed by Kraft Foods in 1971 but later was discontinued

Top Ten Cloves: Possible Reasons Google Flu Tracker Didn't Pick Up Swine Flu

News Item: Google flu tracker had trouble with latest virus

10. Having to accommodate Michelle Bachmann likely stressed the calculations

9. Coordinates, and program, set to track only a very, very small, very particular section of Palo Alto

8. It was in Beta Mode, Invitation Only

7. Had to throw out thousands of searches, from South Bend, Indiana, wishing Swine Flu on President Obama

6. Got sidetracked, tracking Arlen Specter's defection to Democratic Party

5. Couldn't decide , like it's cool logo, on the color palette for "Swine Flu"

4. An unusually high number of "I'm Feeling Lucky" Swine Flu searches skewed results of program

3. Because of Swine Flu, Google shut down its' bus services, so workers couldn't get in to read results

2. Got confused when they started calling it the "H1N1 virus."

1. Wasted weeks trying to find Swine Flu on Google Earth

"Hey! ... Where You Goin' With That Browser!" ...

Good Evening Garlic Fans ...

Sorry for the lack of posting today ...

Another term in Computer Hell, as something has hijacked my browser (Firefox), and, when searching Google, sends me to a phony or altered Google page ... The results may look correct, but the URLs are for marketing and shopping sites ...So far, I haven't had any success in correcting it (all scanning has produced no infections, spyware, malware or trojans) ...

If anyone has some pointer on this problem, either leave a comment or email me ...

Hopefully, we'll be back on track tomorrow.

It's Not Global Warming, It's Google Warming!

In the "Now, What Do We Have To Worry About?" Department;

Revealed: the environmental impact of Google searches

Performing two Google searches from a desktop computer can generate about the same amount of carbon dioxide as boiling a kettle for a cup of tea, according to new research.

Holy Hot Search Bar, Batman!

I'm destroying the planet, just for my searching for discounted lambs wool sweaters!

While millions of people tap into Google without considering the environment, a typical search generates about 7g of CO2 Boiling a kettle generates about 15g. “Google operates huge data centres around the world that consume a great deal of power,” said Alex Wissner-Gross, a Harvard University physicist whose research on the environmental impact of computing is due out soon. “A Google search has a definite environmental impact.”

[Snip]

Google is secretive about its energy consumption and carbon footprint. It also refuses to divulge the locations of its data centres. However, with more than 200m internet searches estimated globally daily, the electricity consumption and greenhouse gas emissions caused by computers and the internet is provoking concern. A recent report by Gartner, the industry analysts, said the global IT industry generated as much greenhouse gas as the world’s airlines - about 2% of global CO2 emissions. “Data centres are among the most energy-intensive facilities imaginable,” said Evan Mills, a scientist at the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory in California. Banks of servers storing billions of web pages require power.

[Snip]

Nicholas Carr, author of The Big Switch, Rewiring the World, has calculated that maintaining a character (known as an avatar) in the Second Life virtual reality game, requires 1,752 kilowatt hours of electricity per year. That is almost as much used by the average Brazilian.

“It’s not an unreasonable comparison,” said Liam Newcombe, an expert on data centres at the British Computer Society. “It tells us how much energy westerners use on entertainment versus the energy poverty in some countries.”

Hmmm ... Perhaps the first volley in what will be an epic battle down the road, "the colonisation of real space by virtual space"?

Okay folks, this means you have to cut down on your searches for Jennifer Lopez's butt, or Carmen Electra, and you can wait to see the newspapers to find out the score, or latest news, from Manchester United.

And solar power your tea ...

We've got average Brazilians to save!


Bonus Google Riffs

Garlic Exclusive! Google Launches Search for Famed Woman Aviator

Breaking News! Giant Search Engine Downed By GOP and RNC Staffers ... Google Crashes! Besieged With “I’m Feeling Lucky” Searches From White House, Congress ...Amazon, D.C. Novelty Stores Hit With Run On Magic 8-Balls

Google Fires Executive Chef; Caught Searching Recipes On Yahoo, MSN

Life Imitates Art ... Or, Did Burt Lancaster Invent Google Earth?

Stymied By Publishers, Google To Digitize Bazooka Joe Comics

In The "Close Only Counts In Horseshoes" Department ...

Or: "There's No Crying In Venture Capital! ... There's No Crying In Venture Capital"

If you are burned out on the Olympics (aka "The Michael Phelps Show"), Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain's Low Road Express, previews of the new Cold War, or the endless yammering about John Edwards (yikes, we are planning on an Edwards post today), Hillary Clinton's planned coup in Denver, then you can reboot with this post.

Let's say you made a mistake, let a good thing get away, and want to stop beating yourself up, and realize that you are not the only person, ever, that has made a mistake and let something good get away, well, here's a good article for you to take a look at.

SiliconValley.Com had a feature the other day on "The Venture Deals That Got Away"

EVEN SILICON VALLEY PROS OFTEN MISS OUT ON THE NEXT BIG THING

"The most oft-told tale about Cowan concerns a visit to a college friend in Menlo Park eight years ago. She wanted to introduce him to Stanford University students Larry Page and Sergey Brin, who were renting her garage and noodling on a search engine. But there were a lot of search start-ups back then.

Cowan asked her: "How can I get out of this house without going anywhere near your garage?"

The wealth of the Google guys has since been calculated as high as $18 billion each.

Check it out, it's rather entertaining ...


Bonus Silicon Valley Links

Life Imitates Art ... Or, Did Burt Lancaster Invent Google Earth?

Breaking News! Giant Search Engine Downed By GOP and RNC Staffers; Google Crashes! Besieged With “I’m Feeling Lucky” Searches From White House, Congress; Amazon, D.C. Novelty Stores Hit With Run On Magic 8-Balls

Apple Settles With Cisco!; Rolling Dice With New iBeckham Phone; Jobs Promises Aging Soccer Star Can Store "Billions of Photos" of Himself; New "Posh" Command Added

New iPod Phone Requires Downloading Calls

Top Ten Cloves: How The Amazon Kindle Can Effect The Legal World

HP To Auction CEO-For-The-Day On eBay

News In Brief - Wikimania Attendees Take Over Event; Wikimania Conference Ends Abruptly In Cacophonous Chaos; First Speaker Drowned Out By Attendees With Edits, Footnotes and Sub-Categories

Top Ten Cloves: Ways Google Can Provide Better Day Care

News Item: On Day Care, Google Makes a Rare Fumble

10. Out with the "organic, natural" food and in with cheaper McDonald's Happy Meals!

9. Offset cost for parents by renting the Google Day Care kids out as focus groups

8. Make the kids generate revenue - put'em to work on the Google Phone

7. Send the kids out on the grounds of the Google Campus, collecting bugs, and then announce the new "Google Gas" (but only in Beta-Mode, fill-ups by Invite-Only)

6. Resolve Viacom dispute with own content - Start putting a daily "Best of Google Day Care Bloopers" up on YouTube

5. Hire Chuck Norris to run the program - Just his staring at it will make it perform better

4. Cut down on Waiting List and notify parents of acceptance by having them hit the "I'm Feeling Lucky" search bar

3. Weed out any of the toddlers who have been using Google Earth for "pool parties"

2. Sponsor multi-million-dollar contest - Google Day Care Preschoolers vs. John McCain, on using the Internet

1. Public Service - Have them do a group "Not Alex" commercial

Retro Garlic ... Food Fight!

There was a food fight, of sorts, recently, out in the Land of Silicon.

Seems the young upstarts at Facebook wanted some better grub and one place they knew they could get some, was from the older, more established upstarts, Google.

We'll let John Murrell, from GMSV take it;

Facebook poaches Google chef: There's always a danger when a key employee leaves for a new company that he or she will stir things up by taking a few co-workers along, but some defections can be particularly grating. Looking to coddle its growing workforce a bit more, Facebook started shopping for its own executive chef in January. And when Sheryl Sandberg came over from Google to become COO last month, she said she knew just the guy at her old place. Everything panned out and now, as Carolyn Jung (until recently, the Merc's food editor) reports at Food Gal, Josef Desimone has been whisked away to become the new Facecook. Valleywag tells us that Sandberg and Desimone blended well at the Googleplex, quoting one ex-employee saying, "Josef was Sheryl's favorite chef at Google. Every time she moved buildings, so did he." Apparently, though, not everyone is steamed at the departure. A health-conscious Googler tells Valleywag, "Everyone hated his cafes. He had the worst heavy, everything-fried menus." We await the reviews from the new venue. Now the question is whether Google will retaliate -- maybe Sergey Brin will hire away Mark Zuckerberg's personal ski waxer or something.

My, My, My ...

(Then, Facebook went out and knocked Google's teeth out, for mumbling about it.)

There's something about being a chef at Google ...

The Retro Part;

Google Fires Executive Chef; Caught Searching Recipes On Yahoo, MSN

Oh well, that's the way the cookie (digital or edible) crumbles, I guess ...


Bonus Google Moments

Garlic Exclusive! Google Launches Search for Famed Woman Aviator

Stymied By Publishers, Google To Digitize Bazooka Joe Comics

Google Launches Lobbyist; As Usual, In Beta-Mode and By-Invite Only

Good Post Alert: How Google Got Its Colorful Logo

The Garlic has gotten a lot of mileage with Google (one such post - our first Google riff - is in today's This Date ... On The Garlic), including a good one, on their infamous "I'm Feeling Lucky" bar.

Earlier this week, The Garlic stumbled onto a post (H/T to Good Morning Silicon Valley), on the development, and numerous iterations of the infamous logo

From Wired Magazine's Sonia Zjawinski "How Google Got Its Colorful Logo";

"In just a few short years, Google's logo has become as recognizable as Nike's swoosh and NBC's peacock. Ruth Kedar, the graphic designer who developed the now-famous logo, shows the iterations that led to the instantly recognizable primary colors and Catull typeface that define the Google brand. Kedar met Google co-founders Sergey Brin and Larry Page through a mutual friend nine years ago at Stanford University, where she was an assistant professor. Page and Brin, who were having trouble coming up with a logo for their soon-to-launch search engine, asked Kedar to come up with some prototypes. "I had no idea at the time that Google would become as ubiquitous as it is today, or that their success would be of such magnitude," Kedar says.

It's an eight-page image display, with descriptions of each iteration, what was right or wrong about it, some of the changes so infinitesimal, it's like a head-scratching WTF!.

In all, it's an entertaining look at something that has become so engrained in our daily lives, our every minute on the World Wide Web, the logo encompassing the company name, that, much to Larry and Sergey's consternation, has become a verb all over the globe.

Check out "How Google Got Its Colorful Logo"


Bonus Google Riffs

ThinkProgress: Bush says he uses “the Google.”

Google Fires Executive Chef; Caught Searching Recipes On Yahoo, MSN

Stymied By Publishers, Google To Digitize Bazooka Joe Comics

Google Launches Lobbyist; As Usual, In Beta-Mode and By-Invite Only

Top Ten Cloves: Reasons Google Needs A Lobbyist

Google May Come To Terms With Publishers; Will Digitize Cliff Notes Only

Google Begins Talks With White House To Digitize Wiretaps

Top Ten Cloves: Other Great Things You'll Get Using Google's New Retooled Search Engine

News Item: Seeking more traffic, Google widens format

10. If you are an illegal alien, when you finish your search, PRESTO!, you are now a full, naturalized U.S. citizen

9. Since we've already digitized the Bazooka Joe Comics, set your filter to conduct your search as Bazooka Joe (try it, it's fun)

8. One of the coolest features is that you can set filters to reset your entire life to "beta-mode"

7. Warning: We believe that George Soros may be a Google user, so, you run the risk of getting smeared by Fox News' Bill O'Reilly

6. Based on how ruthless you are with your searches, Google may contact you about becoming a Google Lobbyist

5. If you are a fan of Senator Ted Stevens, turn on the sound feature to hear your search clanging through the pipes

4. Warning: We are only retooling the Google Search Engine, not "The Google", that President Bush uses

3. The "I'm Feeling Lucky" search could make you really, really lucky - Random searches placed in lottery for Google stock

2. It's not on the system yet, but coming soon is all you will have to do is think about the search and your browser will automatically go to Google with all the results

1. Don't be alarmed ... If you search for the wrong thing, you'll hear Vice President Dick Cheney's voice telling you "Frankly, you're out of line with that question."

Retro Garlic: Life Imitating The Garlic

We had to do a double-take today, when we noticed the headline of an article appearing in The Washington Post .

Pretty close to the zone of life imitating The Garlic

Seeking Iran Intelligence, U.S. Tries Google

Back in early October, The Garlic had the scoop on this;

Google Crashes! Besieged With “I’m Feeling Lucky” Searches From White House, Congress

Top Ten Cloves: Things About The Google-YouTube Deal

News Item: Google Gambles on Web Video

10. Are you ready for “YoogleTube?”

9. Reportedly, SEC filing shows Google motivated to do deal strictly to bust Rupert Murdoch’s balls, and keep YouTube away from merging with MySpace

8. Clause in sale contract forcing YouTube to have new, very sparse Home Page

7. Agreed, in advance, to point at each other and issue “plausible deniability” statements when the copyright issues start popping up

6. Stipulation in contract that YouTube, under any circumstances, can’t hire former Google Executive Chef, Charlie Ayers

5. Searches on both Google and YouTube for “moron” videos only pull up Mark Cuban

4. Even though they have been running for about three-years, YouTube has to start over again, in Beta-Mode

3. LonelyGirl15 making waves, demanding cut of Google Ad Word revenue

2. YouTube braced for a flood of new “Numa Numa” or “Star Wars Kid” videos from Google Employees

1. New “I’m Feel Lucky” search bar on YouTube delivers photo of founders’ Chad Hurley and Steve Chen holding giant oversized $1.6-Billion check

Reportedly, Google’s SEC filing states their purchase of YouTube was strictly done to bust News Corp., as well as MySpace and Fox News, owner Rupert Murdoch’s balls