If Scooter Libby leaves that Christmas stocking hung, it may end up with not much more that a piece of coal in it.
'Cuz that Christmas Presidential Pardon sure ain't flying down the chimney this year!
The Department of Injustice released their 2007 List of Pardons today, and I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby was not among the 29 names getting their holiday orgasm, their golden "I Got Away With It" certificate.
No doubt, the holiday eggnog in the Libby abode must be heavily rummed-up, and, perhaps, tasting a bit clumpy this evening.
What's an ass-kissing, law-breaking, CIA-covert-agent-exposing convicted felon have to do around this place to get a little love from his Compassionate Commander Guy ex-boss?
Like Tessio, in 'The Godfather", The Scooter must have been thinking "Hell, he can't do that ... It screws up all my plans ..."
Now, Little Scooter has to sit around, probably with Mary Matalin getting all in his face, constantly badgering him with drafts of new fundraising letters, listening to publishers tell him his previous books suck, but "if you write about what you did", which has to tempt the Mrs. Scooter to be barking in his ears, "Screw them, take the money!", keeping his steely pluck, relying on all his experience as a dedicated civil servant, and wait until next year to get his freedom.
Maybe Fred Thompson will drop out of the race (rather than waiting, about another two months, to be booted out of it, embarrassingly, with numbers that would only look good on a golf card) so he can be by his buddy's side, putting the arm on all those neocons to kick up a few bucks for the Little Scooter.
Wouldn't be surprised either, to hear news that Cheney was brought into the hospital -again - with a broken defibrillator.
Cheney has to be sitting around, stewing, the picture of a Looney Tune cartoon, his oversized head throwing off buckets of sweat, thinking about is this the time to say 'fuck it", and just issue the pardon himself.
Fox News will have to file away all that B-Roll, tape over the sappy soundtrack, book new talking heads for all the appearances they had the Little Scooter pegged for - across their Freakshow line-up (but, they will put him on with Chris Wallace anyway, lest they have to listen to him piss-and-moan about not getting anyone to come on his show).
Boy, sure wouldn't mind being the package of Sweet'N Low on the table, the next time Scooter and Judy get together for coffee
Bonus Scooter Links
Jane Hamsher: Poor Scooter, Always a Bridesmaid…
Breaking News! Fox Bounces The Juice and Brings In The Scooter; OJ Out, Libby In, As Fox Looks To Make Lemonade Out Of Their Lemons; Reagan Snares Cheney Aide For “If I Leaked ...” Special; No Hush Money But Donation Made To Defense Fund
Top Ten Cloves: Things Overheard Last Night At Scooter Libby Fundraiser
Scooter, you'll need to keep that pondering pose for, about, another year ...