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Koo-koo-ka-choo, John, the Maverick Man
Palin loves you more than you will know
God bless you, please, John, the Maverick Man.
Heaven holds a place for those who bomb away,
Hey, hey, hey

Where have you gone, Joe the faux Plumber,
Our Campaign turns it's lonely eyes to you.
What's that you say, John, the Maverick Man.
Revoltin' Joe has left and gone away,
Yea, Yea, Yea,
Yea, Yea, Yea!

Yes, save this, mark this down, for it encompasses, almost, the perfect snapshot, the finger-on-the-button, a dead-ringer in horseshoes, the milieu, imprint, definition of the Stumblin' Bumblin' John McKKKain campaign.

Joe The Plumber Stands Up John McCain?



Now, either the staff told the Stumblin' Bumblin' Fly Boy that Joe "Living-Way-Outside-His-YouTube-Moment" the Plumber wasn't in attendance, and he "forgot", or, the Rove Rats never bothered to make sure the fawned-over Flying Monkey was front-and-center, to be foisted on the bused-in audience of school children (this is the second time he's abused students, forcing them to sit through one of his campaign events, perhaps, in a vein attempt to sprinkle and plant new "My Friends" seeds; Or, in the case today, to avoid the embarrassment of not having a quorum of an audience) .

Actually, it may be a combination of both.

McCain forgets that Joe the Plumber isn’t at his rally: ‘Where is Joe?’

Update - McCain staffers tell ABC News that it was "a simple mix up" and Joe "will join the campaign at a Thursday evening event."

Update - Dana Bash updates:

McCain aides called it a “miscommunication,” but once I got on the bus I called Wurzelbacher myself and asked him what really happened. He told me that he had hoped to come to the morning rally, but that no one from McCain’s campaign ever called him back to confirm, Bigger ooops.

Well, that kind of diamond-drilling precision sure ought'a rope in more votes.

No doubt you've seen or heard all the news on this bald buffoon, from his "mulling over" running for Congress, to the latest wet dream of a recording contract (Apparently, Nashville has plans to start stamping out new Lee Greenwoods, rivaling the schedule of Chinese toy factories), to his foot-in-mouth policy discussion the other day, that even the Faux News guys couldn't swallow.

I'm beginning to believe that the only reason the debunked Maverick clings to this ignorant clump of ridiculousness, is to bookend him with his sterling VP choice, Mommy Moose.

Peas-in-a-pod, as it were ...

Boy, if they really wanted to make heads explode, sit The Wasilla Whiz Kid, and Joe the Dumber, down, together, for a Katie Couric interview.

They'd be scrapping up brain matter, from "sea, to shining sea".

And There Was Also This

It might serve the voting public better, if Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnnie just finished off the campaign wearing clown shoes.

Remember a short time ago, when the Dead Campaign Express was regaling themselves with calling Obama a "celebrity", complete with the "Paris Hilton" video.

I mean, they just couldn't get enough of that, entertaining themselves, so smug that they were pinning something on Obama that would surely sink his campaign.

It was all kittens-with-a-ball-of-string, those heady, "celebrity" days.

Well, later in the day, Joe the Dumber did show up.

Joe the Plumber shows at McCain rally

"By the way…shouldn’t we hear from our celebrity Joe, just a second, Joe Wurzelbacher?”

"All right guys, I didn't prepare anything," Wurzelbacher said. "The only thing I've been saying is just get out and get informed. I mean really know what you're talking about when you're talking about it. Don't take everyone's opinions. I came to my own opinions by research. Get involved in the government. That way we can hold our politicians accountable and take back our government.”

"Our celebrity Joe"

Someone needs to check, were these people the model, the inspiration, for the film "Idiocracy"?

Must be the "electrolytes".


Bonus "Smokin' Joe" Riffs

Kyle E. Moore: IT’S ALIIIIIVE!!!!!!

Matthew DeLong: Where Have You Gone, Joe the Plumber?

Wonkette: Joe The Whore Shows Up At McCain Rally, Finally

TChris: Drains Unclogged, Peace Treaties Negotiated: Joe Does It All

Nicole Belle: Pushing To Extend Those Fifteen Minutes Of Fame

John Cole: Fifteen Minutes and Counting…