Top Ten Cloves: How Bush Administration Reacted To News of The Death Star Galaxy

News Item: Jet From Supermassive Black Hole Seen Blasting Neighboring Galaxy


10. Checked with NASA, to make sure it wasn't some drunk astronauts pulling a prank

9. Debated for a few hours about using it as an opportunity to raise the Terror Alert Chart, and call for Duct Tape and Plastic

8. For a short period of time, not knowing what was going on, Bush changed into his flightsuit, just in case

7. Rush Limbaugh called... Wanted to know which was older - the Death Star Galaxy or Hillary Clinton

6. Worked late into the night to see how that could fit this into FISA Debate and giving Telcoms Immunity

5. Condoleezza Rice raced over, in case they needed her to go out and talk about "mushroom clouds" again

4. Immediately started writing press releases, blaming Al Qaeda in Iraq

3. Bill O'Reilly and William Donahue called on Bush to renounce this Death Star Galaxy as a liberal, secular ploy to diss Christmas

2. Had someone call Erik Prince and get assurances Blackwater USA wasn't involved

1. Assigned someone to tutor Dana Perino, to make sure she knows something about the Hubble Telescope

Bonus Video

MSNBC Countdown - Alison Stewart Interview with Derrick Pitts, chief astronomer of the Franklin Institute, discussing the emergence of the “Death Star Galaxy"