Sure Enough, Obama Blamed For Ash Cloud

We didn't do a good job with our post last evening, 'Paging Bobby Jindal', about the erupting volcano in Iceland.



We should have known better, should have dug around, it was there ... It was there.

We wrote last evening;

I don't believe it has happened yet, but if this does drag on, you can plan that some Right Wing Freak Show Flying Monkey, Teabagger, or Faux News will find a way to blame this on Obama, the Democrats, mock Climate Change or, incredulously, tie it in to how the government is taking of heatlhcare (we can, perhaps, count on our seminal Ignorant Dolt, Michele Bachmann)

We were off, but not by that much, as this morning brings the news, thanks to Think Progress;

Limbaugh: Volcanic eruption in Iceland is God’s reaction to health care’s passage

Yesterday, hate radio host Rush Limbaugh talked about the volcanic eruption that’s affecting air travel over much of Europe, saying it was “God speaking” in response to the passage of health care:

You know, a couple of days after the health care bill had been signed into law Obama ran around all over the country saying, “Hey, you know, I’m looking around. The earth hadn’t opened up. There’s no Armageddon out there. The birds are still chirping.” I think the earth has opened up. God may have replied. This volcano in Iceland has grounded more airplanes — airspace has more affected — than even after 9/11 because of this plume, because of this ash cloud over Northern and Western Europe. At the Paris airport they’re telling people to head to the train station to catch trains out of France, and when people get to the train station they’re telling people, “There aren’t any seats until at least April 22nd,” basically a week from now. It’s got everybody in a shutdown. Earth has opened up. I don’t know whether it’s a rebirth or Armageddon. Hopefully it’s a rebirth, God speaking.

Is this more of a watershed moment, of Limbaugh muscling in, taking over Pat Robertson's patch of lunacy?

I don't quite follow El Jeffe de Dittoheads' logic.

I mean, for the sake of argument, why Iceland, what did they have to do with anything about our healthcare bill?

Especially, for the Flying Monkeys, for it to be, officially, Obama's fault, wouldn't it have to be an American volcano that erupted?

Wouldn't we have to see some red, white, and blue lava oozing out of it, the ash cloud canceling a Teabagger rally, or something?

Ann Althouse, defending the drug-addicted media clown, tries to slap Think Progress upside-the-head, for being "humorless", pointing that they didn't call out Obama:

Somehow Think Progress has no trouble seeing that Obama had to be joking when he said "There’s no Armageddon out there" but when Rush Limbaugh pointed to the Icelandic volcano that could only be crackpot religion.

This is what the President said, after signing the healthcare bill, which came after the War-Of-The-Worlds with the PartyofNoicans, the Teabaggers, and the Flying Monkeys of the Right Wing Freak Show, who called it a government takeover, death panels, and, of course, Armageddon;

“I’m not exaggerating. Leaders of the Republican Party called the passage of this bill Armageddon. Armageddon! End of freedom as we know it,” he told a rally in Iowa City.

“So after I signed the bill, I looked around to see if there were any asteroids falling, some cracks opening up in the earth? Turned out it was a nice day. Birds were chirping. Folks were strolling down the Mall,” he said.

This is what the Flying Monkeys do.

They ignore facts.

Nice try there Ann, but the President didn't pull his riff out of thin air - you left out the context.

And, I think we covered the "crack-pot religion" thing up above.

The Cheeseburger That Sweats (h/t Barry Crimmins) said it, which means Matt Sludge will, likely, scream it on his headlines, the Right Wing Freak Show will start picking it up (as evidenced with Althouse), Faux News will be chirping about it, and, before you know it, some mainstreamer, like a David Gregory, or Jake Tapper (or Mike Allen - He'll print anything!), will insert it into a comment, ask an administration official to confirm or deny it, and off we go ...

The week's meme ...


Bonus Rushbo Riffs

Top Ten Cloves: Things Overhead While The Nobel Peace Prize Committee Reviewed Rush Limbaugh's Nomination

Jesus, It Sounded Like A Violation of the Rico Act!

NFL Singing Rush's Tune?

Paging Bobby Jindal!

Mother Nature sure has been racking up the bonus points lately.

Devastating earthquakes in Haiti, and Chile (and, last week, again, in China) ... Flooding Spring rains here in the USofA ...

And, now, an exploding volcano in Iceland, Eyjafjallajökull, blanketing the better part of a continent with nasty ash;



Volcanic ash: Europe flights grounded for third day

Millions of air travellers are stranded as thousands of flights are being cancelled for a third day.

The disruption from the spread of ash would continue into Sunday, European aviation agency Eurocontrol said.

Airlines are losing some £130m ($200m) a day in an unprecedented shutdown of commercial air travel.

"Forecasts suggest that the cloud of volcanic ash will persist and that the impact will continue for at least the next 24 hours," a statement from Eurocontrol said at around 0830 GMT.

[snip]

The UK extended its ban on commercial flights until at least 0700 local time (0600 GMT) on Sunday.

Many other countries, from Ireland to Ukraine, have either closed airspace or shut key airports. In northern France and northern Italy, airports are shut until Monday.

So, we hear you whisper quizzically, what's this volcano in Iceland have anything to do with Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal?

Does he speak Icelandic?

Well, for one, we're not calling on him (yet), to perform an exorcism on Eyjafjallajökull.

Rather, just another reminder of how, in giving the PartyofNoican Rebuttal to President Obama's first SOTU address, Jindal pooh-pahhed funding of volcano monitoring;

Jindal, among other distortions, dissed the monitoring of volcanos;

While some of the projects in the bill make sense, their legislation is larded with wasteful spending. It includes $300 million to buy new cars for the government, $8 billion for high-speed rail projects, such as a "magnetic levitation" line from Las Vegas to Disneyland, and $140 million for something called "volcano monitoring." Instead of monitoring volcanoes, what Congress should be monitoring is the eruption of spending in Washington, D.C

For the want of a talking point ...

It was only delicious irony, just less then two-months later, Alaska's Mount Redoubt erupted.

News tonight has that scientists don't really know how much longer Eyjafjallajökull is going to spew the heavy-duty ash - could be days, weeks, or, even months.

I don't believe it has happened yet, but if this does drag on, you can plan that some Right Wing Freak Show Flying Monkey, Teabagger, or Faux News will find a way to blame this on Obama, the Democrats, mock Climate Change or, incredulously, tie it in to how the government is taking over healthcare (we can, perhaps, count on our seminal Ignorant Dolt, Michele Bachmann for that)


Bonus Links

NYT: Air Travel Crisis Deepens as Europe Fears Wider Impact

Ron Beasley: Volcanoes and History

The Lede: Video of Volcano Spewing More Ash

The Lede: One Word: Eyjafjallajokull

Too Perfect! ... Jindal Jabberwocky II

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Power comes from lying ... Lying big and getting the whole damn world to play along with you ... Once you got everybody agreeing with what they know in their hearts ain't true, you get them by the balls

Senator Roark, from “Sin City - That Yellow Bastard”

Well, the Oxymoronpalooza ended this weekend, otherwise referred to by the MSM as the Southern Republican Leadership Conference, and, not to anyone's surprise, there was more red meat tossed about then at a month full of Texas barbecues.

That would the Texas that hasn't - yet - seceded from the Union.

They forgathered in New Orleans, and true to the PartyofNoican coda, they managed to completely avoid making any mention, not just something compassionate, or heartfelt, none-zero-zilch, comments about the city The Bush Grindhouse let drown.

No doubt, the Café du Monde must have been off-limits, lest any of the slimebags be caught being "French" by some tourist Teabagger, surely creating a litmus test, and, likely, a career-killer.



You had the volcano-denier, the only open-publically-elected exorcist, Governor Bobby Jindal, whining about the PartyofNoicans feelings being hurt, because people call them names.

And, there was Diaper-Boy, Senator David Vitter, pumping up Mommy Moose, and the Teabaggers, urging the PartyofNoicans to walk hand-in-hand with, that they're getting a bad rap too, while whipping up a little smear against the President.



Of course, a red-meat-mashing wouldn't be complete without the Village-of-the-Damned Cheney daughter, Liz, doing her part to "Keep America Safe", much in the manner of her father, delivering, essentially, an off-the-shelf NeoNitWit speech;

Below the fold, more excerpts from Cheney's speech.

When it comes to foreign policy, it looks increasingly like there are three pillars to the “Obama Doctrine” – (1)Apologize for America, (2)Abandon our allies, and (3)Appease our enemies.

I think she stopped short of advocating the building of those 1950's "Fallout Shelters".

Mommy Moose was there, fresh off her Bachmann-Palin Overdrive (and her little joust with the President), perhaps, using the event as an early dry run at her candidacy in 2012.

Or not;

There was nothing about the speech that necessarily indicated one way or another whether Palin would run for president in 2012. She's not doing anything that looks like preparing a national organization, but she's so well-known that she wouldn't have to. Her political outfit, SarahPAC, did hand out little packets of Alaska-made caribou and reindeer jerky to every delegate ("An Alaskan Snack from SarahPAC!" the label read, along with invitations to follow her on Twitter and Facebook). And there were a few Palin buttons around the room.

But it's not entirely clear she'd have the whole thing sewn up. As the delegates filtered out of the hall afterwards, I stopped one woman randomly, figuring her own Palin button meant she was a big fan. True enough, she was. "It was awesome," she said, identifying herself only as Loretta from east Tennessee. "She's wonderful. She thinks the way America thinks, she knows what we want, and she's not afraid to voice it... We need change, but we can't afford Obama's change -- he's killing us." Palin, she told me, would bring the right kind of changes -- jobs, prosperity, God back in our country. "This is a Christian country, it's not a Muslim country," she said. "We have Muslims here, and they are welcome here. But we as Christians have rights, too." Obama, she insisted, is a Muslim (which is why she wouldn't tell me her last name or exactly where she lives). So surely, Loretta would be voting for Palin if she ran in two years? "I don't think she's ready," she said. "I love her. I don't think we're ready for her as president yet... I think she still needs to educate herself a little more on foreign policy."

Well, she got to do a lot of bad jokes, bash the President, and it doesn't matter if she just took the stage and started reading the Louisiana phone book, the Teabaggers love her - emphatic period.

Last, but not, least, we saved the best for last.

This was, truly, almost, breathtaking.

The former Speaker of the House, the man who put out a "Contract On America", Newt Gingrich actually used the gathering to display that Einstein's theory on insanity, was accurate.



Steve Benen was in awe, describing it as "PARTY LIKE IT'S 1995", while Al Giordano billed it as "Supervillain Newt Reveals His Plan for World Domination!".

See, Newt wants to bend the river, turn around this nonsense of being "the Party of No", to becoming the the "Party of Yes".

Yes, that is, to shutting down the government (again);

But the plan that Gingrich got the most applause from, as he tried to rally a few thousand GOP activists to say "yes," involved... just saying no in a different way. "When we win control of the House and Senate this fall, stage one of the end of Obamaism will be a new Republican Congress in January that simply refuses to fund any more," he said. "The Congress doesn't have to pass the money. If EPA gets no money, it can't enforce cap and trade."

[snip]

In other words, shut down the government. Which, of course, worked out very well for Gingrich the last time he tried it.

[snip]

If that sounds familiar, it's probably because that was the agenda Gingrich carried into power after the 1994 election. It turns out the "party of yes" concept isn't actually about working with the White House to get anything done; it's about finding new ways to sell the same old GOP policies without looking stubborn in the process.

While the crowd lapped it up like happy soup, Jed Lewison, over on the Daily Kos, stuck a pin in Newt's balloon;

Teabaggers of the world: Newt is lying to you

Moreover, if Gingrich were serious, the GOP would be shutting down the Federal government now. Whether or not we like it, the fact remains that Republicans in the Senate could filibuster appropriations bills today. They don't need to win the fall elections to stop appropriations bills. Yet they are not following Gingrich's strategy because they know -- as Gingrich proved in 1995 -- that it is political suicide.

[snip]

I suppose if the GOP were to essentially dismantle the Federal government, stopping the Social Security Administration from sending out checks and blocking Medicare from paying claims that they could also stop the subsidies. But if you believe the GOP will actually go that far, I've got a state in Bob McDonnell's Confederacy to sell you.

Newt's pledge may sound good to the teabagging Republicans. But they should also know this: They. Will. Never. Do. It. Didn't do it in 1995. Won't do it in 2011.

To add some more spice, Make-Up Mitt Romney won the Straw Pole (by one vote, over Ron Paul), and he wasn't even in attendance.

With this level of idiocracy being bandied about, the Midterms are sure gonna be fun.

Newt, Romney, The Wasilla Whiz Kid...

It's going to be like the blogosphere having an intravenous feed of shit you just can't make up.

Somewhere over the rainbow
skies are blue
and the dreams...that you dare to dream
really do come true

Take it away, Eva Cassidy!

Eva Cassidy - Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Too Perfect! ... Jindal Jabberwocky II

Oh, this is just too rich.

This is one of those things, you can't make-up.

Off-screen voice: Governor, you just had the biggest meltdown of your career, on national television, so what are you going to do?

Bobby Jindal: I'm going to DisneyWorld!

Holy Cow!

Jindal's office says the governor and his family leave for the Orlando vacation resort today

After giving one of the biggest speeches in his time as a politician, Gov. Bobby Jindal is heading to Disney World.

Jindal's office says the governor and his family leave for the Orlando vacation resort today.

The vacation comes one day after Jindal gave his first televised speech to the nation, offering the Republican Party's response to President Barack Obama's address to Congress.

This, pretty much, guarantees a merciless skewering on Saturday Night Live, if they're on this weekend.

Who is this guys' staff?

For one, David Corn is not on it;

There was only one phone call Bobby Jindal needed to make on Wednesday--and that was to Jay Leno.

[Snip]

Jindal ought to steal a move from Bill Clinton and seek salvation on Leno's set. In 1988, Bill Clinton, then a little-known Arkansas governor, delivered the keynote address at the Democrats' presidential convention. It was a horribly boring speech. He droned on for what seemed like forever. And when he began his summation and said "in conclusion," the audience cheered. He immediately became a national punchline. But Clinton moved fast to stop the bleeding. He joked with reporters about his terrible performance, and he quickly booked himself a spot on Johnny Carson's show. (For you youngsters, Carson hosted The Tonight Show before Leno.) Sitting next to Johnny--after Carson gave him a very, very, very long introduction--Clinton engaged in self-ribbing and made good sport of his abysmal performance. Four years later, he was elected president of the United States.

Hope the cell phone connection is good from Disney, there, Bobby.

And, he's going to need to be making some calls.



Anchors Aweigh ... And Awash

It seems that Jindal's Hurricane Katrina story is (was) one of the fish that got away.

Jindal's Katrina Story: A Tall Tale?

The evidence continues to grow that the story Bobby Jindal told Tuesday night -- about how he backed a tough-talking sheriff's efforts to rescue Katrina victims, government red-tape be damed -- was, how to put it ... made up.

[Snip]

But there are several pieces of evidence that suggest this just didn't happen. Nothing, to be sure, that definitively proves the story was made up. But more than enough to declare it highly suspicious.

[Snip]

The implication here is that Jindal talked to the sheriff after the fact, not that he was in his office during the moment of crisis.

Read all of Zachary Roth's post, it is fascinating

Melissa McEwan gives a shout out on it with "Pardon Me, Mr. Governor, But I Do Believe Your Pants Are on Fire*", while Steve Benen raises an eyebrow with "ABOUT THAT BOAT STORY..."

And, The Lava Flows ...

Jindal, in his dissing of Volcano Monitoring, managed to raise the dander of a Nobel Prize winner.

Paul Krugman;

So what did Bobby Jindal choose to ridicule in this response to Obama last night? Volcano monitoring, of course.

And leaving aside the chutzpah of casting the failure of his own party’s governance as proof that government can’t work, does he really think that the response to natural disasters like Katrina is best undertaken by uncoordinated private action? Hey, why bother having an army? Let’s just rely on self-defense by armed citizens.

The intellectual incoherence is stunning. Basically, the political philosophy of the GOP right now seems to consist of snickering at stuff that they think sounds funny. The party of ideas has become the party of Beavis and Butthead.

Not only this, but he's hit one into Mommy Moose'salley;

Alaskans fume over Jindal volcano-monitoring gripe

Something tells me this is going to haunt the Louisianna Governor for some time.

The Dittohead Umbrella

The biggest dittohead of them all is lying down the law.

Limbaugh Defends Jindal, Warns Conservatives They Are ‘Making A Real Mistake

LIMBAUGH: [T]he people on our side are really making a mistake if they go after Bobby Jindal on the basis of style. Because if you think — people on our side I’m talking to you — those of you who think Jindal was horrible, you think — in fact, I don’t ever want to hear from you ever again. … I’ve spoken to him numerous times, he’s brilliant. He’s the real deal.

Wonkette: Limbaugh Orders Republicans To Leave Bobby Jindal Alone

The Politico: Limbaugh still loves Jindal

Say What!

The Queen of the Flying Monkeys, Michelle "Stalkin" Malkin has her radar on, full bore;

"Helen Thomas has been gabbing with a film crew this morning, according to Washington Times White House correspondent Christina Bellantoni.

Bellantoni just posted this on Twitter:

“Bobby Jindal was ‘pitiful,’ Helen Thomas tells film crew, right before making a ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ crack.”

Thanks for the Offer Guys, But I'll Handle This Myself

Wonkette: Radio Host Forces Michael Steele To Give ‘Slum Love’ To Bobby Jindal

Jason Zengerle: What's Michael Steele Trying to Prove?

Think Progress: EXCLUSIVE: Tancredo Says Jindal’s Speech Was The ‘Last Nail In The Coffin’ For His Presidential Ambitions


The Old Ax - What Goes Up, Must Come Down

NYT: Governor Jindal, Rising G.O.P. Star, Plummets After Speech

Robert Stein at Connecting The Dots: Jumping on Jindal

Down With Tyranny: Jindal Won't Do Much For The GOP But His Shockingly Inept Speech Has Made A Star Out Of Kenneth The Page

Damezol: Catch a Falling Star: Gov. Bobby Jindal's Response to Obama Infuriates Republicans, Gets Jindal Compared to Kenneth the Page


Bonus Riffs

Jindal Jabberwocky

Bobby, Get Your Gun ...

Maybe If They Exorcise The Money, First ....

Paging Linda Blair ...

Bobby, Get Your Gun ...

Anything you can do,
I can do better.
I can do anything
Better than you.

If this keeps up, Leonard Pinth Garnell is going to need that Universal Healthcare package, to deal with his exhaustion.

Two big duds in the same week.

And, I don't believe Tweety mumbling a plaintive "Oh God" as Bobby Jindal came to the podium, was the only one to do so ... There had to be, throughout Jindals' GOP Talking Points rehash, titled "Americans Can Do Anything", thousands of others.

Numerous folks are comparing Bobby Jindal's rebuttal to Obama last evening with Kenneth, from "30 Rock".

Fine, however, for me, it played out much more like an old SNL skit, a "Bad Politics" delivered dead-center in the strike zone for Garnell to seeth as a "delicious disaster".

Boy, if the message we are supposed to believe from it, that the Republican's "Can Do" spirit is better than the Democrat's "Can Do" spirit, man are the Republicans so tone deaf, and so, so fucking lost.



I mean, when your offical rebuttal to Obama's Not-A-State-of-the-Union-State-of-the-Union Address is Hurricane Katrina, and a racist sheriff .... 

Let me tell you a story. 

During Katrina, I visited Sheriff Harry Lee, a Democrat and a good friend of mine. When I walked into his makeshift office I'd never seen him so angry. He was yelling into the phone: 'Well, I'm the Sheriff and if you don't like it you can come and arrest me!' I asked him: 'Sheriff, what's got you so mad?' He told me that he had put out a call for volunteers to come with their boats to rescue people who were trapped on their rooftops by the floodwaters. The boats were all lined up ready to go - when some bureaucrat showed up and told them they couldn't go out on the water unless they had proof of insurance and registration. I told him, 'Sheriff, that's ridiculous.' And before I knew it, he was yelling into the phone: 'Congressman Jindal is here, and he says you can come and arrest him too!' Harry just told the boaters to ignore the bureaucrats and start rescuing people.

From Joan Walsh;

But Jindal is making no sense: He's lying about Obama's plans (there will be no government-run health care) and his Katrina stories are the perfect symbolism for the current GOP: They'll rescue wealthy bankers from oblivion, but leave low-income black people on roofs. Also, Politico caught it first, to my knowledge: The sheriff Jindal lionized in his speech, Harry Lee, is most famous for gruesome racial profiling during his tenure as Jefferson County's top cop. His Wikipedia page has all the details.

Jindal, among other distortions, dissed the monitoring of volcanos;

While some of the projects in the bill make sense, their legislation is larded with wasteful spending. It includes $300 million to buy new cars for the government, $8 billion for high-speed rail projects, such as a "magnetic levitation" line from Las Vegas to Disneyland, and $140 million for something called "volcano monitoring." Instead of monitoring volcanoes, what Congress should be monitoring is the eruption of spending in Washington, D.C.

Well, he might have well mocked the rebuilding of the levees in New Orleans.

Nate Silver has the 411 on this, in his "Jindal Versus the Volcano";

Before the cataclysmic eruption, roughly one million people lived in the region around Mount Pinatubo, including about 30,000 American military personnel and their dependents at the two largest U.S. military bases in the Philippines--Clark Air Base and Subic Bay Naval Station. The slopes of the volcano and the adjacent hills and valleys were home to thousands of villagers. Despite the great number of people at risk, there were few casualties in the June 15 eruption. This was the result of intensive monitoring of Mount Pinatubo by scientists with the Philippine Institute of Volcanology and Seismology (PHIVOLCS) and the USGS.

The first recognized signs that Pinatubo was reawakening after a 500-year slumber were a series of small steam-blast explosions in early April 1991. Scientists from PHIVOLCS immediately began on-site monitoring and soon declared a 6-mile-radius danger zone around the volcano. They were joined in a few weeks by USGS scientists from the Volcano Disaster Assistance Program, a cooperative effort with the Office of Foreign Disaster Assistance of the U.S. Agency for International Development.

The USGS and PHIVOLCS estimate that their forecasts saved at least 5,000 lives and perhaps as many as 20,000. The people living in the lowlands around Mount Pinatubo were alerted to the impending eruption by the forecasts, and many fled to towns at safer distances from the volcano or took shelter in buildings with strong roofs. Additionally, more than 18,000 American servicemen and their dependents were evacuated from Clark Air Base prior to the June 15 eruption. In the eruption, thousands of weaker roofs, including some on Clark, collapsed under the weight of ash made wet by heavy rains, yet only about 250 lowland residents were killed. Of the 20,000 indigenous Aeta highlanders who lived on the slopes of Mount Pinatubo, all but about 120 were safely evacuated before the eruption completely devastated their villages.

No, wait a minute, it was, forget about the Democrats, and their Big Government, Big Spending Ways, you should just "Trust Us";

In recent years, these distinctions in philosophy became less clear -- because our party got away from its principles. You elected Republicans to champion limited government, fiscal discipline, and personal responsibility. Instead, Republicans went along with earmarks and big government spending in Washington. Republicans lost your trust -- and rightly so.

Tonight, on behalf of our leaders in Congress and my fellow Republican governors, I say: Our party is determined to regain your trust. We will do so by standing up for the principles that we share -- the principles you elected us to fight for -- the principles that built this into the greatest, most prosperous country on earth.

"... Went along with earmarks and big government spending in Washington ...?"

Hello? ... The Bush Grindhouse and their billions-of-dollars lies? ... Ted Stevens? ... The rubber-stamp Republican-controlled Congress for six-of-the-last-eight-years?

Yeah, we'll get back to you on that one, Bobby ... 



It would have been much better off, despite whatever the traditions may be, if the Republicans sat this one out last evening.

If Jindal is supposed to be one of the top tier, "the smart one" of the potential 2012 field, you saw how worried The Wasilla Whiz Kid is about him, using the day to dump the news of settling her Ethic Charges, and getting dunned about $7,000 in reimbursement payments and taxes.

Trying to compete with the Big Show, Obama in his groove spot of a giant spotlighted speech, was a lost cause.

They should have saved themselves, and sent out Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain, for his continuing bitch session, which, undoubtedly, would have been equally, if not more, entertaining.

But no, the Republicans wanted to show us their future, a shitbag of failed policies, bankrupted ideology, completely empty of any new ideas, and no desire to even get into the game.

That's their mantra and their sticking to it.

My fellow citizens, never forget: We are Americans. And like my Dad said years ago, Americans can do anything.

Yeah, that song has already been sung.

Anything you can be
I can be greater.
Sooner or later,
I'm greater than you.

Bonus Jindal Riffs

There is an explosion, out on the World Wide Web, of great reactions to Jindal today, so we have posted them separately ... Jump on over to Jindal Jabberwocky to catch up on them.

And, since we weaved it into the narrative above, we might as well post it.

Annie Get Your Gun - Anything You Can Do

Jindal Jabberwocky

As we noted above, in our Bobby, Get Your Gun ..., there has been a fevered reaction to Bobby Jindal's rebuttal ("Americans Can Do Anything"), on President Obama's speech to the joint session of Congress last evening (The Not-A-State-of-the-Union Address).

So much so, that it wouldn't do justice to our typical "Bonus Links" that we often include.

Nosireebobby ... We have to hightlight some of the great riffs that are out there, with their own post.

First, the basics

Full text of Obama's speech to Congress and the nation

Full text of Gov. Bobby Jindal's Republican response



A Little Pre-Game Trash Talk

ABC News, in two posts, seemed to want to paint the President as a braggart;

Obama Claim: Done More in 30 Days Than Other Presidents

Official: Obama Accomplished More in 30 Days Than Any President in Modern History

And the Queen of the Flying Monkeys, Michelle "Stalkin" Malkin was having a hard time sitting still, waiting for the speech.

Obama - A+

Joan Walsh: "We are not quitters"

Libby Spencer: Scoring the speeches

Digby: The Speech

And, over on Brilliant at Breakfast, Jill sighed It would be a relief even if all he could do is speak coherently

And, now, some of the Jindal Jabberwocky!

Paging 30 Rock

Andrew Sullivan: Kenneth Jindal

Andy, at Towle Road: Obama Speaks to Congress, Jindal Does 30 Rock Impression

Greg Veis: Epic Fail, SOTU Rebuttal Version

Is there a more dangerous assignment for a rising party star to accept than a State of the Union rebuttal? Seriously, it’s hemlock. Tonight, in all fairness, would’ve been tough to pull off even if Bobby Jindal didn’t sound like Kenneth from “30 Rock,” or, in my favorite analogy of the evening, a third grader performing in his Thanksgiving play: Obama’s favorables are still roughly comparable to delicious, delicious beer’s; Republicans are widely perceived to be obstructionist naysayers; and, as Jon Cohn notes below, Americans are scared enough these days to prefer policy solutions to partisan sniping. But, holy crap, did Jindal blow it. I don’t even want to rehash the deadly obvious reasons why--just check out what the people who were supposed to like it are saying.

About That Volcano Stuff

Now, it was astoundingly strange, for the Governor of state that has a city that sits below sea level, and flooding can come, just from a normal summer thunderstorm, let alone a Category 5 hurricane, to go out and disparage the section of the Stimulus Package for Volcano Monitoring.

Andrea Thompson: Gov. Jindal Follow-up: What Is 'Volcano Monitoring'?

Davenoon - Bobby Jindal: Soft on Volcanoes

Matthew Yglesias: The Case for Volcano Monitoring

Nate Silver: Jindal Versus the Volcano


Hurricane Katrina Jindal's Good Luck Charm

Steve M: JINDAL LOVES THAT BOAT STORY

David Weigel: Bobby Jindal and the Stimulus as Hurricane Katrina


Oh, God

It was, primarily, the Right Wing Freak Show that has got their panties in a bunch, over Tweety letting out an "Oh, God" as Jindal strode out and walked down the short corridor to the podium, in the Governors Mansion.

Michael Calderone - MSNBC welcomes Jindal: 'Oh God'

Michael Goldfarb: Matthews Not Tingly for Jindal

Michelle "Stalkin" Malkin: Bobby Jindal and the expectations game; plus: which MSNBC host said “Oh, god?”

Chris, at TVNewser: "Oh God" Heard From MSNBC Set As Gov. Jindal Appears for GOP Response

Chris, at TVNewser: "Oh God" Book II: Chris Matthews Responds

I was taken aback by that peculiar stagecraft, the walking from somewhere in the back of this narrow hall, this winding staircase looming there, the odd anti-bellum look of the scene. Was this some mimicking of a president walking along the state floor to the East Room?

They Don't Like Me ... They Really Don't Like Me

Andrew Sullivan: The Right On Jindal

Think Progress: Fox Panel’s Verdict On Jindal’s Speech: ‘Childish,’ ‘Amateurish,’ ‘Not Exactly Terrific’

Taylor Marsh: Calling Sarah Palin

LEHRER: Now that, of course, was Gov. Bobby Jindal, the governor of Louisiana, making the Republican response. David, how well do you think he did? 

BROOKS: Uh, not so well. You know, I think Bobby Jindal is a very promising politician, and I oppose the stimulus because I thought it was poorly drafted. But to come up at this moment in history with a stale "government is the problem," "we can't trust the federal government" - it's just a disaster for the Republican Party. The country is in a panic right now. They may not like the way the Democrats have passed the stimulus bill, but that idea that we're just gonna - that government is going to have no role, the federal government has no role in this, that - In a moment when only the federal government is actually big enough to do stuff, to just ignore all that and just say "government is the problem, corruption, earmarks, wasteful spending," it's just a form of nihilism. It's just not where the country is, it's not where the future of the country is. There's an intra-Republican debate. Some people say the Republican Party lost its way because they got too moderate. Some people say they got too weird or too conservative. He thinks they got too moderate, and so he's making that case. I think it's insane, and I just think it's a disaster for the party. I just think it's unfortunate right now.

Republicans might have to rethink this Jindal thing.

Calling Sarah Palin? Yep, all Palin has to do is stay out of sight and study. They'll end up begging her to come back, with Rush & Sean Hannity leading the cheers. She can't answer the simplest questions but at least she can deliver a speech.


Piling On

Steve Benen: SO MUCH FOR THE JINDAL BREAKTHROUGH...

Paul Begala: Memo to Bobby Jindal: Dump Rush

TBogg: Bobby, we hardly knew ye

John Aravosis (DC): Bobby Jindal epitomizes Republicanism

Nick Baumann: Bobby Jindal's Stimulus Lies

Joe Sudbay (DC): Jindal's reviews are in: "really poor performance" "unserious" "hackneyed" "childish" (and that's just from one article in Politico)

Jamison Foser: Will media repeat Jindal's false attack on Obama, or correct it?

John Amato: Bobby Jindal's Zombie like performance uses phony Republican talking point of 'magnetic levitation' trains

New Garlic Poll ... If the GOP Governors don't want the Stimulus Money, Obama should ...

These guys certainly would qualify, all by themselves, as a boatload of Ignorant Dolts.

Louisiana's Bobby Jindal, Mississippi's Haley Barbor, South Carolina's Mark Sanford, and some others, have all firmly inserted their heads up their rear ends, and have come out bashing the Stimulus Package, all saying they would reject it, or a certain amount of it.

It's all part of their new/old, Back-To-The-Future, Newt Gingrich-Contract-On-America strategy, that is going to sweep them back into power

See, by saying no, becoming the party of "No", being the obstructionists to the reigniting of our economy, they are placing all their chips on President Obama failing, just so they can hit the campaign trails with a "Naa, Naa, Naa, Naa, Naa ... We told you so!".

Other than it will hurt scores-of-hundreds-of-thousands around the country, in their respective states, I would be inclined to say "Go For It!" ... Keep listening to the Cheeseburger That Sweats (aka Rush Limbaugh; H/T to Barry Crimmins for that), and the new Town Crier, Rick Santelli... Let them lead you to even further irrelevance.

So, we thought, rather than waste energy on them, we'd offer up a few options for President Obama, on what to do with the money they are rejecting.

If the GOP Governors don't want the Stimulus Money, Obama should ...

Give it to his daughters

Buy John McCain a helicopter

Go to Las Vegas and "stimulate" the crap tables

Stash it away in a Slush Fund for 2012

Go over to the leftside column and place your votes!

Bonus Links

Think Progress: Obama Hits GOP Governors Rejecting Stimulus Funds: There’ll Be ‘Ample Time For Campaigns Down The Road’

DemFromCT: Operation Unified Lemming

Chris Cillizza And Perry Bacon Jr.: Well Before the 2012 Season, Obama Kicks the GOP a Political Football

Maybe If They Exorcise The Money, First ....

Or, maybe he can get around it and direct the Stimulus funds to go towards teaching Intelligent Design.

I would hope somebody will walk up to Louisianna Governor Bobby Jindal and start knocking on his head.

Give it a few good raps, like your were knocking on a door, to wake someone up, just to see if Jindal's head gives a hollow, echoing sound.

It's enough that the Republicans, like swollen, proud pigs after a mud bath, are going around boasting to their constituents, the great windfall the Stimulus Package will be delivering to them, all the while, leaving out how they voted against it.

But wait, it gets better.

Jindal has indicated he will give a Palinesque "Thanks, but no thanks" to Stimulus moohla

Jindal Rejects $90 Million In Recovery Funding That Would Have Benefited 25,000 Louisiana Residents

Today, however, Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal announced his intention to oppose changing state law to allow his Lousiana citizens to qualify for the second two unemployment provisions. Jindal said the state would only be accepting money to increase the unemployment insurance payments for those who currently qualify for unemployment insurance. 

In all, Jindal turned away nearly $100 million in federal aid for his state’s unemployed residents. Further, as the National Employment Law Project projected on Febuary 13, EUC extension alone would have benefited 24,981 Louisiana residents. Jindal justified his decision by claiming that expanding unemployment benefits would result in tax increases for businesses. In a press release, the governor’s office explained:

"The Governor said the state will not use a portion of the stimulus package that requires the state to change its law to expand unemployment insurance (UI) coverage to qualify for up to $32.8 million of the federal stimulus funding because it ultimately would result in a tax increase on Louisiana businesses."

That's going to make a great campaign speech for his 2012 ambitions;

I want to do for the country, what I did for my state ... I want to screw over as many of our unemployed citizens as I can ... Just give them a kick in the ass ... I won't lift a finger for a single one of them ..."

Maybe he can get the old gang together, and exorcise the money, you know, take that Satan spirit right out of it, wipe it clean, tell old Lucifer "Thanks, but no thanks" and then for God and Country, slide that Stimulus stash into the state coffers.

I mean, Jesus, if he is going for it in 2012, he, in all likelihood, will be going into battle against Mommy Moose, he's gotta start learning how to suck in as much of that Washington money to his state as she has... She'll clobber him, and laugh at him and,.probably, looking at his turning down the money, start taunting him as "The Governor to Nowhere".

Way to go there, Bobby ...

The RWFS Flying Monkeys and Dittoheads are gonna love ya!


Bonus The Governor To Nowhere Riffs

Nelson: Like A True Conservative

Christopher Beam: Take the Money and Run ... Republican governors don't really want to reject stimulus money—they just want to complain about it

Sam Stein - Nagin On Jindal: Presidential Ambitions Clouding His Stimulus Judgment

Paging Linda Blair ...

Top Ten Cloves: Ways President Obama Can Better Sell His Stimulus Package




"Okay ... All the brainless people who don't want any Stimulus money, raise your hands ..."

A Cokie Roberts Daydream

We interrupt this campaign season for a brief, Cokie Roberts daydream.

Breaking News! Obama Ending Hawaiian Vacation, Jetting Family To Myrtle Beach

Plans On Meeting With ABC's Roberts, To Personally Apologize For Wrong Getaway Choice

Sources of have told The Garlic that Senator Barack Obama hurriedly packed up his belongings, and his family, jetting them quickly to Myrtle Beach, North Carolina, where he will meet with, and apologize to ABC News correspondent Cokie Roberts.

Yesterday, on 'This Week with George Stephanopoulos', Roberts criticized Obama for choosing to vacation in Hawaii, calling it "foreign and exotic".

Speaking to local reporters as he scattered to get on the plane, Obama was heard to say "I don't know what I was thinking ... I have to get better, and remember, even in my down time, my personal time, I have to make every decision a political one ...And we should probably think about bringing Cokie on as an advisor"

Obama also complimented Roberts, saying "I don't believe I have ever met anyone, with the grasp of geography as Cokie Roberts ... I don't know how many of the rest of the working press could, so rapidly, rip off that Hawaii is a state ... That is most impressive ..."

WTF?

From Media Matters: Cokie Roberts on Obama's vacation: "I know his grandmother lives in Hawaii and I know Hawaii is a state," but it looks "foreign, exotic";

ROBERTS: Yeah, that he has certainly come nowhere near closing the deal. As we've talked about before, in this year that should be such a Democratic year given all the other indices, he is tied in the polls and stage-sided in the polls and going off this week to a vacation in Hawaii --

VICTORIA CLARKE (former Pentagon spokeswoman): Right.

ROBERTS: -- does not make any sense whatsoever. I know his grandmother lives in Hawaii and I know Hawaii is a state, but it has the look of him going off to some sort of foreign, exotic place. He should be in Myrtle Beach, and, you know, if he's going to take a vacation at this time.

CLARKE: Well, and --

ROBERTS: And I just think that, you know, this is not the time to do that.

CLARKE: And there's plenty of time left. I mean, let's not forget, Barack Obama and his campaign beat the Clintons, which is no easy feat in any year. They beat them, and they beat by being pretty tough on Hillary Clinton sometimes when they felt they needed to. I think they realize that most people right now aren't paying attention. They don't need to do it quite yet. There is plenty of time after the conventions to do that, and I think you'll see the surrogates coming out of the woodwork just ready to redefine McCain. Buried in some of these stories in the last few days, one of the Obama advisers, of course on background, saying, just wait, by the time November comes around, people are going to have a different picture of John McCain.

Boy, it goes to show how deep in the tank Cokie Roberts is for Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain (or, at minimum, anti-Obama) when former DOD/Bush Grindhouse mouthpiece Torie Clarke looks like the liberal moderate.

The Jed Report has the video.

I mean, that's like The Time Tunnel meets Jurassic Park.

I am a bit surprised the studio didn't burst into flames after that exchange.

Or, at least, to play it safe, bring Bobby Jindal back, to perform an exorcism.

So, I guess, not only is Barack Obama not black enough, not ready to lead, not ready at 3AM, an arugula-eating elitist, worshiper of a devil-tongued minister, world-wide, airhead celebrity, now, the schmuck can't even get taking a vacation right ...

How is he ever going to last until November?


Bonus Crumbling Cookie Roberts Riffs

Bob Cesca: Great Wall of Duh: Hawaii Edition

Steve Benen: Targeting Obama for his choice in vacation spots

Joe Sudbay: ABC's Cokie Roberts: Hawaii is "some sort of foreign exotic place"

Digby: All American Insult

Oliver Willis: Barack Obama Joins 2.5 Million Fellow Americans In Vacation Elitism

Paging Linda Blair ...

"Your mother sucks cocks in hell ..."

No, Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain isn't denigrating and chewing out his wife again.

But it may be words the Governor of Louisiana has heard.

Eric Kleefeld and Kate Klonick, over on TPM Election Central, have a rip-roaring tale today;

Is Bobby Jindal -- Who May Be On McCain's Veep Shortlist -- An Exorcist?

But one of Jindal's job titles hasn't gotten much attention -- and it just might prompt a few questions if his Veep candidacy gains steam: Exorcist.

As others noted during his 2003 and 2007 gubernatorial campaigns (see update), in an essay Jindal wrote in 1994 for the New Oxford Review, a serious right-wing Catholic journal, Jindal narrated a bizarre story of a personal encounter with a demon, in which he participated in an exorcism with a group of college friends. And not only did they cast out the supernatural spirit that had possessed his friend, Jindal wrote that he believes that their ritual may well have cured her cancer.

WOW!

Hmmm .. That has to lead to more questions, like has Jindal ever been hired to find Johnny Favorite, or, has he met Mr. Louis Cyphre?

With Jindal being touted as climbing that greasy Republican ladder, perhaps the McCain Camp has other designs, like having Jindal exorcise all the Stumblin' and Bumblin' out of McCain.

Or, maybe this is to ease Linda Blair into the campaign, since Barack Obama has already sewn up Scarlett Johansson.

We shall see ...

Go over to and read Is Bobby Jindal -- Who May Be On McCain's Veep Shortlist -- An Exorcist? ...

It's a gas!


Bonus Links

Jesus General: Your Mother Sews Socks That Smell

Jay Newton-Small: Jindal's Exorcism

Perrin On McCain, Clinton and Pornographic Ringtones

He's A Senator - And A Dessert Topping!