Thursday, November 10, 2005

Top Ten Cloves: How Oil Company Executives Justified High Prices At Senate Hearing Yesterday

10. It will be on Dr. Phil's next week. We all are compulsive gamblers and we're sorry about it

9. We've set aside those profits for when President Bush gets those Private Social Security Accounts he's talked about

8. Let's see, we put in a new swimming pool, renovated the game room and did a lot of landscaping at our summer home

7. Did you see how much Jack Abramoff is charging to get access to the President?

6. We don't get two Category 5 hurricanes every year, we've got to exploit that when we can

5. We're a bunch of white guys, in our 50's, how else we going to attract younger woman if we don't have a lot of cash?

4. President Bush used to be an Oil Executive; We're just building up our campaign chests for 2008 in case we run.

3. If you think prices are high now, bust our chops some more and see just how high we can raise them

2. Until Vice President Cheney approves releasing the notes of our Energy Meetings, we can't give you any answers

1. We have to fund our research in renewable, alternative energy sources (sound of roaring laughter followed)

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