Monday, May 02, 2011

Breaking! - Al Qaeda Seeks Sainthood for OBL

Sources tell The Garlic that instense discussions have been underway between the Vatican and representatives of Al Qaeda, seeking for Pope Benedict XVI to begin the process of Beatification for Osama bin Laden to become a saint.

Representatives of Al Qaeda were in attendance at yesterdays Beatification ceremony for Pope John Paul II.

A major obstacle, beyond the traditional five-year waiting period, is there is no evidence that Bin Laden sexually abused young boys, or protected those that did.

The Vatican is insisting that Al Qaeda stipulate to this before any Beatification processes can be started, and fast-tracked, as was the case for Pope John Paul II.

More, as this story develops.

Bonus Riffs

Bin Laden is late pope's 'miracle': Peru leader

Tim Rose: WikiLeaks: Osama bin Laden 'protected' by Pakistani security

Nicole Belle: Wanker Extraordinaire Joe Scarborough: Obama’s Base Didn’t Want Him To Catch Bin Laden

My Boy Lollipop

Vatican Discounts "Bonfire Pope"; Says Flames "Not Hunched Over Enough"