Friday, October 21, 2005

Top Ten Cloves: How David Stern Will Enforce New NBA Dress Code

10. Those Western String Ties are not considered acceptable wardrobe

9. Players with entourages, dress code extends to them as well

8. Men's Wearhouseto be Official NBA Sponsor so no excuses players can't get proper clothing

7. Players with Video Game endorsements, your video character has to be dressed correctly also

6. No "Tear-Away" suits allowed

5. Some "thug" or "gangsta" attire will be allowed, but only when players go into stands to beat up fans

4. Players' "whores" and "mistresses" must dress "ladylike" when attending games; Private Home or Hotel attire is optional

3. For those players taking steroids, pills and/or liquid vials must be color-coordinated to your game-day attire

2. Extras from the "Sopranos" will be in each arena as "fashion consultants", to make sure players arrive properly dressed

1. Any players that need help, NBA has video of how Kobe Bryant dressed when he went to court on his rape charges

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