Our Ignorant Dolt of the Week ... Karl Rove!

Yes, we're a day, or two late with it ...

Partly due to the need to be lazy yesterday, and, as usual, there were a few choice candidates in the running of our weekly IDOTW.

Like, how can you ignore the still-on-going saga of the Illinois governor?

This is absolutely hysterical, unless you happen to live in Illinois, in which case, I suspect, doctors, and chiropractors, are doing a booming business, treating the citizens in the Land of Lincoln for severe cringing.

The Senate Republicans certainly showed IDOTW mettle, carrying the GOP flag for busting unions, submarining the bailout of The Big Two.

Even The Commander Guy made a late run at it, sneaking off for his Mission Accomplished Victory Tour in Baghdad, only to be shown his sub-20's ratings aren't limited to this country.

That message delivered to him in the form of two thrown shoes.

But in the end, it was hard to ignore the Turd Blossom.

Now, you can make an argument, that Bush's Brain (yeah, I know, an oxymoron), should be grandfathered to the status of Grand Ayatollah of Ignorant Dolts, much as we have done with the Ultimate Pinhead, Bill O'Reilly (Happy Holiday, there, Bill'o!).

But since he's sticking his grubby nose in a lot of places, we'll keep him in the field-of-play, for now.

Let's see, what heights did the Son-of-the-Golden-Cock-Ring reach to, to snatch that IDOTW title ...

Well, for one, he is threatening to muck up the waters, looking to continue to pull strings, and go to battle against the incoming President Obama, on his choice of Attorney General.

Looking back at what he has left in his wake, I find it abstruse that the Congressional Republicans would want him to take the helm of anything, to have him give them anything, even the time-of-day, which, you would have to double-check, to see if it was legit, or if it was smear.

I mean, Jesus, Cheney, of all people, warned the Congressional Republicans to get off their asses, get a glove, get in the game, otherwise they will cement the GOP as "the party of Herbert Hoover".

Oh yeah, related to that, he also got together with the other idiot, O'Reilly, to blow kisses, back-and-forth, how the media is in the tank for Obama, that all the troubles we have now - the devastated economy, global warming, escalating unemployment, a melted-down Wall Street, are all being overplayed by the media, to make Obama look good.

There's also the above-mentioned Commander Guy, and how Rove is spearheading reviving/rebuilding/creating/purchasing/pulling-out-of-thin-air, The Bush Grindhouse legacy.

Extremely arduous task, no doubt, but you just gotta roll up your sleeves, and get to it, one thrown shoe at a time.

All good IDOTW things, but where we dump the bucket of Gatorade over him, is his call for a new Republican day.

In the Murdoch rag last week, Rove penned 'How the GOP Should Prepare for a Comeback', and, if it is an actual report, or certified policy paper, I suspect the subtitle to it would be "The Wide, White World of Karl Rove".

He, essentially, repackages the last eight-years, looks to steal a few things from the Democrats, calls on Newt Gingrich to open up some new Republican Brownshirt Camps, capture the youth vote, and this gem;

Finally, ideas are always the most important currency of politics and never more so than after a party loses. The relationship between GOP policymakers and conservative policy thinkers should be strengthened.

Déjà vu, anyone?

Like the the PNAC, and AEI, didn't have enough of a say, helping the Bush Grindhouse lie us into a war.

No where, in his grand plans, does the Rove call for the Republicans to become diverse.

Pitch a big tent, for sure, but make sure we have the same gatekeepers, and lets keep the party for us, not for "them".

No Karl Rove.

The only thing you need to prepare for, is to walk up to the podium, and collect The Garlic's "Ignorant Dolt of the Week" award.

Something tells me, this will be the first, of many to come.


Bonus Rove IDOTW Riffs

Digby: New Strategery Same As The Old Strategery

Wonkette: Karl Rove: Everything Is Awesome For Republicans!

Amanda Terkel and Matt Corley: Karl Rove's sly deal with Fox ...The GOP mastermind is billed as a top campaign analyst for the cable news network. But he has his fingerprints all over John McCain's White House bid

Ed Secretary Spellings On Turning Down Date With Rove: "He Was So Inept And Inartful"

"Can we have our $40,000 back?"

Karl Rove, Living In An Etch-A-Sketch Kind of World

Citizen's Arrest ... Brilliant!

Well, Well, Well ...

We've finally seen some movement on our call of a year ago.

Last July, The Garlic put forth, since the 110th Congress wasn't going to do anything (apparently, due to a lack of tables) regarding the lawlessness of the Bush Grindhouse, that it would be up to us, everyday Americans, to jump into action, and make a "Citizen's Arrest".

And there would be benefits to it;

There must be some tiny hamlet, some Main Street USA berg that would be willing to put themselves on the map, become the saviors of our nation. A Sheriff with balls, a U.S. Attorney ready to swing back for justice.

Think Truth or Consequences, New Mexico... You can change your name to Citizen's Arrest and really cash in on it.

Leave history for a moment. For starters, think of the economic boon it would be.

The MSM media camped out for weeks, eating in your diners, sleeping in your motels (if you have a hotel, even better), shopping in your stores. Same for the protesters that will show up.

We're talking millions here.

Well, say hello to Des Moines, Iowa!

Via Think Progress;

Last Friday, police in Des Moines, Iowa arrested four people who attempted to make a citizens’ arrest of former top White House aide Karl Rove, who was in town to speak at a GOP fundraiser. A retired minister and three members of the Des Moines Catholic Workers community were cited for trespassing. However, according to a press release, the judge presiding over the case praised their efforts ...

Bravo!

They've broke the ice, and the aim needs to be higher, but there you go.

The first, of hopefully many more, effort to bring this criminal regime to justice.

Let's go people ... The clock is ticking ...

Yeah, Karl, We Certainly Know The Type

Obama is "coolly arrogant"?

At a breakfast with "Republican insiders" Monday morning, ABC News reports, Rove said of Obama: "Even if you never met him, you know this guy. He's the guy at the country club with the beautiful date, holding a martini and a cigarette, that stands against the wall and makes snide comments about everyone who passes by."

Yes, Karl, and you watched, didn't you ... You stared ...

And it burned you, didn't it.

Maybe, helping them with their homework, their tests, only to see them lip-locked with Joe Jock after school.

Or going to your prom, stag, sitting at the geek table, with all the other little dateless geeks.













But now, years later, your at the club, watching "him" ... Again ...

Being the doughy, spectacled geek, living in someone else's shadow, downing shots of hard liquor, bitterly making cutting, angry comments, from the other side of the room, at the family's legacy table, your perch, on everyone else in the room - especially the Muffys and the Biffs - smug in self-praise, that your bile musings are the vindication that you won, you came out on top, not them, so take that all you cheerleaders, all you football heroes ...

Even Margaret Spellings thought he was a bowser;

Spellings paused, then said: "Have you met Karl Rove?

"He was so inept and so inartful," she added. "I mean, I couldn't even understand."

Hmmm ... Not exactly martini-and-beautiful-date suave, I would say.

Well, there's always the solid gold cock ring to fall back on ...


Bonus Rove

Rove / Nixon (Karl hits at the 3:55 mark)

John Cole: Country Clubfoot In The Mouth

Steve Benen: Rove picks the wrong metaphor to slam Obama

Jeff Fecke: Everybody Knows That Guy!

Kyle E. Moore: The Name Game

Karl Rove, Living In An Etch-A-Sketch Kind of World

"Have darkness ... Will travel."

I was tempted to title this "Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House", playing off the theme we ran with yesterday.

But that was a comedy, and Jim Blandings (played by Gary Grant; Mrs. Blandings, the lovely Myrna Loy) was a ad man, not a lying, covert-CIA-Agent-exposing, Turd Blossoming, Railroading-Democrat-Governors-into-jail, thug of the Bush Regime.

Karl Rove's next move: A million-dollar home on Florida's Emerald Coast

"Whatever the next chapter of Rove's life has in store, some of the action will probably take place in Rosemary Beach, Florida, where he bought land in 2002.

According to political journalist Jim Moore, many factors probably influenced the timing of Rove's resignation--including the desire to cash in on lucrative speaker's fees and the prospect of reinventing himself as a political pundit on the national stage.

"Ultimately, though, what probably appeals to Karl the most is being a sort of freelance Dr. Evil," Moore –- a Rove critic -- explained in an email to RAW STORY. "He can do his work now for hire under the guise of any organization that wants to hire him or he can do it for fun and generally avoid the restraint of party or candidate. Have darkness. Will travel."

That isn't getting off to a good start.

Late last year, it was reported the hawking of his memoirs wasn't, exactly, setting the publishing world afire, and, very recently, he got hounded at one of his speeches, with an attendee asking "Can we have our $40,000 back?"

And what digs!

Rosemary Beach, Florida bills itself as a vacation community, but Rove's home is no beach bungalow. His Dill Lane pad is a 2,578-square-foot cedar and white stucco structure with a stoop, 4 bedrooms, 3 baths, and an outdoor shower. Opposite the main house, separated by a small walled courtyard, is a two-story carriage house with a two-car garage on the ground floor.

But, we're not sure the locals are all to happy with the move.

One waitress who works at Bud & Alley’s restaurant downtown, said she's seen Rove and his guests sequestered in the large downstairs area of the popular eatery. Saying she was happy not to have been his server, she quipped, “I would have told him what I thought of him and gotten fired.”

Check out and read (it's loaded with pictures) Karl Rove's next move: A million-dollar home on Florida's Emerald Coast

And one last thought ...

Is Rove setting himself up in The Sunshine State for legal reasons?

Isn't there something about Florida, and Florida law - one of the things that has kept a roof over O.J. Simpson's head - that, in losing lawsuits, you can't have your residence taken, or pensions carried away?

Perhaps someone more versed in this law can weigh in on it, in the comments (and, perhaps, we may post a follow-up, as this story develops).


Bonus Karl "New Math" Rove Riffs

Libby Spencer/Newshoggers: A small serving of justice for Siegelman

Steve Benen/The Carpetbagger Report: After having been railroaded by Rove machine, Siegelman released

Oxymoron of the Day: Karl Rove at an Idea Festival

Karl Rove: “Be prepared! Find the bastards. And pile on!”

Karl Rove, Living In An Etch-A-Sketch Kind of World

"Can we have our $40,000 back?"

Our Etch-A-Sketch Boy was out on the circuit yesterday, at University of Iowa and, well, it didn't go so smoothly.

From KCRG-TV;

"It quickly became a hostile evening for Rove.

Protesters rallied together against Rove hours before he even took the stage.

"He's a traitor for outing a CIA agent and he's the one who really crafted the rhetoric for the invasion of Iraq," UI student Keri George said.

When Rove tried to start speaking, jeers from the crowd immediately interrupted him."

And this, from Think Progress;

During the lecture, Rove lashed out at hostile questioners, telling one man his comment showed “a simple, stupid mind” and chastised what he said were “stupid statements” from the audience. Rove also said that former Amb. Joseph Wilson “lied” about his 2002 trip to Niger and accused an audience member of “perpetuating libel” on the U.S. military for asking about the real number of deaths in the Iraq war:

Responding to a question about CIA operative Valerie Plame Wilson’s outing, Rove, seemingly joking, added:

"I haven’t been indicted yet, but I fully expect to be by the end of the year."

At the end of the talk, an audience member shouted at Rove: “Can we have our $40,000 back?” Rove replied: “No, you can’t.”

Seems to be shaping up for a Twilight Zone type of life of Herr Karl ... You remember, the episode where the degenerate criminal (Larry Blyden) dies and thinks he's gone to heaven, but he's really in hell (with the devil portrayed by the rotund Sebastian Cabot).

Well, we can only hope ...


Bonus Rovian Riffs

Oxymoron of the Day: Karl Rove at an Idea Festival

Top Ten Cloves: Things Markos Moulitsas Will Have To Look Out For When Working With Karl Rove At Newsweek

Developing Story! Rove Has Gone From “Bush’s Brain” To “Bush’s Drain”; White House In Crises, As Rove Takes Credit For North Korean Nuke Test; Sources Say ‘Bush’s Brain” Weary From Sinking Polls, Fundraising; Too Tired To Come Up With New October Surprise

Karl Rove: “Be prepared! Find the bastards. And pile on!”

Was it coincidence or conspicuous of Vanity Fair, to have their February 2008 Proust Questionnaire be our favorite Etch-A-Sketcher, Karl Rove?

He, of election infamy and New Math on the eve of the Iowa Caucus?

They did frame it properly, in the first sentence of the introduction;

"A principal architect of the disastrous presidency of George W. Bush ..."

Fairly mundane responses from the Turd Blossom, until the final question - "What is your motto?";

"I like the one that used to be the motto on the unit coin of the 11th Armored Cavalry Regiment, the Blackhorse: “Be prepared! Find the bastards. And pile on!”

Pile on, indeed ...

And it appears the conservatives are beginning to do that.

Andrew Sullivan, perhaps not the first, but likely what will become a reoccurring theme as the 2008 Elections move on, writing late last night, on how the Iowa Caucus-goers defined their politics, hung one on Rove;

"One is a national party; the other is on its way to being an ideological church. The damage Bush and Rove have done - revealed in 2006 - is now inescapable."

May the piling on continue, be it the corruption of the Justice Department, the firing of the U.S. Attorneys, the Siegalman Case, or the bevy of other evil doings Rove brought on.

It should end up being a very large pile ...

Bonus Links

The Infamous Proust Questionnaire

Le Questionnaire de Proust

PROUST QUESTIONNAIRE

Tough Slogging On The Revisionist Front ... Rove Having A Hard Time Working That Etch-A-Sketch

I'm sure there's some hardcore, dyed-to-the-bone, rightwingers and freakshow freaks, that are salivating for a book from the Smear Meister, Herr Karl Rove, to get the latest revisionist view of his handiwork, but it appears they have a longer wait;

Slow going for Rove memoir auction; Early reports had predicted a $3 million sale, but an auction for the Republican strategist's memoir has dragged on for a month.

“It's very, very slow,” says an executive at one of the few houses left in the bidding. Early reports had predicted a $3 million sale, but some insiders are wondering if Mr. Barnett has had trouble getting to that number. He declined to comment.

And the Turd Blossom isn't the only one having a problem, or two, with his Etch-A-Sketch;

His female counterpart, the doyenne of the Freakshow, plagiarist extraordinaire, Ann Coulter is having the air popped from her balloon.

Mr. Rove isn't the only conservative meeting a backlash. The latest tome by right-wing scribe Ann Coulter, If Democrats Had Any Brains They'd Be Republicans, hasn't caught fire with book buyers.

The title spent just four weeks on The New York Times' best-seller list—compared with 12 for her previous book—and has sold 97,000 copies in the last 10 weeks, according to Nielsen BookScan, which tracks about 70% of the market.

Hmmm... Maybe Coulter has to out a covert CIA agent and Rove needs to don an eyepatch to start the climb out of their self-made muck, to win back the hearts and minds of the Dittoheads?

No doubt, we'll probably see a great deal of these two on the Fox News Network... Nothing a few softball smear sessions can't cure ...

Bonus Rovian Riffs

The Carpetbagger Report: Karl Rove’s transition from mythic to comic figure

War blame-shifting fall out - Nov. 30: If the White House knew that Karl Rove had lied on Charlie Rose, on national TV, about the war, why wouldn't they correct the record the very next day? MSNBC Political Analyst Lawrence O'Donnell talks to Keith Olbermann.

Ed Secretary Spellings On Turning Down Date With Rove: "He Was So Inept And Inartful"

Scott Horton: It Started in Texas: Karl Rove’s Political Prosecutions

Karl Rove, Living In An Etch-A-Sketch Kind of World

What's going on with the Turd Blossom?

Is he punch-drunk? Does he have that Cell Phone disease? For all his years in the Bush Grindhouse, did he sit too close to those huge screens down in the Situation Room?

Last week, on The Charlie Rose Show, the Smear Meister - you may want to sit down for this - blamed Congress for the invasion and occupation (and politicization) of Iraq.

From Think Progress;

ROVE: Charlie– Charlie, I’m not going to tell you the answer to this but I want you to remember you asked me about that because one of the untold stories about the war is why did the United States Congress, the United States Senate, vote on the war resolution in the fall of 2002?

ROSE: Why?

ROVE: This administration was opposed to it. I’m going to talk about that in my book.

ROSE: Tell me, give me–

ROVE: No, no.

ROSE: Give me something.

ROVE: No.

ROSE: Give me something.

ROVE: I just did. I told you the administration was opposed to voting on it in the fall of 2002.

ROSE: Because?

ROVE: Because we didn’t think it belonged in the confines of the election. We thought it made it too political. We wanted it outside the confines of the election. It seemed it make things move too fast. There were things that needed to be done to bring along allies and potential allies abroad and yet–

ROSE: So you didn’t do it because…?

ROVE: There was a vote, and I’m– I’m–

ROSE: But you were opposed to the vote.

ROVE: It happened. we don’t determine when the Congress vote on things. The Congress does.

ROSE: You wish it hadn’t happened at that time. you would have preferred it did not happen at that time.

ROVE: That’s right.

ROSE: Because your argument– your argument is you would have had maybe more inspections. You would have been able to build a broader coalition. You could have done a whole lot other things if you didn’t have to have a vote, right?

ROVE: Right, right, exactly.

Now, all well in good, but Rove has told so many lies, he's losing track.

It was just earlier this year, in April, that he blamed Osama bin Laden for the war in Iraq.

And, The Garlic noted, how, earlier this month, Herr Karl was blaming the Democrats for all that is wrong in our country (Surprise, Surprise! ... Rove Blames - Can You Guess - The Democrats!), and you can safely bet that he will use his new post, the column at Newsweek, to do some further revisionist spin.

But this Charlie Rose thing, man, that is some serious doodling on the ol' Etch-A-Sketch.

Wasn't The Turd Man supposed to be the genius? Bush's Brain, and all that?

Appearing on Keith Olbermann's Countdown Tuesday evening, to discuss the recent spin, Arianna Huffington, and she laid out the obvious;

"But the only problem is that when 1984 was written, Google and Lexus nexus did not exist. And right now they do. And you could go to the White House Web site and we can go to endless statements about that time. We can go to the fact that Karl Rove and Dick Cheney had created the Iraq study group. Remember the White House‘s main objective was to sell, sell, sell that war. I actually happened to be at a conference in Aspen in September 2002 before that vote when Karl Rove himself spoke and was so a bit about that war. I remember him saying things like we have Rumsfeld‘s new army which is going to basically produce this liberation of Iraq, casualty-free. And he was completely elated about the prospect of dominating the Middle East by invading Iraq."

So there Smear Meister Rove, work that Etch-A-Sketch, and turn, feverishly, those two little white knobs.

Draw away, your little neocon sand castles, your field of dreams of the Republican Majority.

But every time you start conjuring, yet, another lie, another spin, another untruth, on The Commander Guy, the regime, and your hand in the contribution to the deterioration of our government, there's going to be an army of people who are going to walk over to you, grab the Etch-A-Sketch out of your hands and shake it, and shake it and shake it, reminding you, with your own words and deeds, that you are in a No Spin Zone.

Heaven help us, you may, some day, be held legally accountable for your actions.

So, you may want to pick up the phone and call some of those cronies you placed in the Justice Department. Ask them which of the penal institutions will allow you to have your little Etch-A-Sketch in your cell.

Hmmm ... You then will have a great deal of time, to perfectly draw out, painstakingly, an exact likeness of, say, a certificate of commutation, or pardon ...