Sunday, March 05, 2006

Weekend Special - Sautéed Cloves 5 March 2006

New charges surfaced today against Dubai Ports World, claiming kickbacks, corruption, and misuse of construction funds, saying that they "only build the doorways, not the entire terminal buildings needed"

The White House would not confirm that Vice President Dick Cheney's schedule has been loaded with birthday and anniversary events, as a means to keep him busy and away from hunting and guns

Reportedly, there was some worry but security experts assured the White House that Cheney would be easier to disarm with a knife in hand, as opposed to a shotgun

To date, in over two-dozen cake-cuttings, there have be no incidents reported

Members of the United Arab Emirates company, Dubai Air World, arrive for an emergency session, to take up the measure, as to withdrawing from discussions with the Bush Administration at taking over management of U.S. airports

At a press conference Friday, when asked about the new Blackberry settlement, Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer unleashed a tirade, tossing chairs and shouting "I'll show them what a X#$%&@$! settlement is!"

The White House, reportedly, has taken out of its' "New Strategy For Victory In Iraq" a plan that called for offering Olympic Luge competitors "career opportunities" with the U.S. Military in Iraq, checking for IED's under automobiles, buses and trucks

In a monumental twist of irony, the lawyers for I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby notified the court that they plan on calling outted CIA Agent Valerie Plame to testify for the defense, believing her expertise in Weapons of Mass Destruction will bolster Libby's claim that he was too busy to have exposed her, or remember who he told that she worked undercover for the CIA

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