Media Lobbies Vegas Court To Delay OJ Proceedings Until November Sweeps

Amicus Brief Filed; Media Caught "Flat-Footed", Need Time To Ramp Up For Doc Blocs and Cooper's Emotions

In an unprecedented amicus brief to the Clark County, Nevada court, and coming down on the side of the court, a conglomeration of media - primarily cable television, print and on-line tabloids, are asking that legal proceedings against O.J. Simpson be delayed until November.

Citing "the public's right to know", the brief states that, with the new television season premiering next week, the start of the NFL football season and Major League Baseballs pennant races, playoffs and world series, and Britney Spear's legal matters, will "dilute resources" and "not serve the public's interest in this matter".

The amicus brief also stated that "by moving these proceedings to November, we, the media, will be in better position to present and promote said proceedings for the consumption of the public interest."

Attachments to the brief included reams of Nielsen ratings from both of Simpson's murder trials, and past November Sweeps results, as well as a DVD collection of MSNBC 'Doc-Blocs" that featured, or mentioned Simpson.

"We got caught flat-footed", offered one cable news executive.

Simpson, 60, was arrested Sunday and charged with multiple felonies, after allegedly breaking into a Las Vegas hotel room, with accomplices and robbing, at gun point, a memorabilia dealer of items that Simpson claimed were his own.

The civil-court-convicted murderer and former pro football star is being held without bail, and, if convicted, faces anywhere from 2 - 60-years in prison.

Ironically, just last week, the controversial Simpson murder book "If I Did It" was released.

"This is tough timing," admitted MSNBC General Manager Dan Abrams, who also hosts the program "MSNBC Live with Dan Abrams."

"We're just getting back into the groove after the summer ... Labor Day and - bang - this drops in." added Abrams, who quickly hustled out to Las Vegas to broadcast his program from Sin City last evening.

"If we can get this into the November Sweeps," said a wistful Abrams, "man, it will be through-the-roof ratings."

"We can get a whole winter's worth of Doc Blocs out of this", said Abrams

CNN, who also joined in the brief, stated that its' star anchor, Anderson Cooper, is just returning from Iraq.

In the brief, CNN offered that "a November time period would allow for Mr. Copper to gather the proper amount of emotions in which to cover these proceedings."

Various news companies, both part of the amicus brief, and not involved in the brief, indicated they have already been receiving complaints from their viewers and readers.

An independent survey of those complaints made by The Garlic show that a large percentage of them lament the demise of 'The World Weekly News' and are asking these media outlets if "Bat Boy" or "Big Foot" were involved or accomplices of Simpson.

Bonus Links

ABC News: Apparent Tape Released of O.J. in Vegas; Apparent Audiotape Released of Sports Memorabilia Dispute Involving O.J. Simpson in Las Vegas

Breaking News! Fox Bounces The Juice and Brings In The Scooter; OJ Out, Libby In, As Fox Looks To Make Lemonade Out Of Their Lemons; Reagan Snares Cheney Aide For “If I Leaked ...” Special; No Hush Money But Donation Made To Defense Fund

Top Ten Cloves: Uses For The cancelled O.J. Book On Thanksgiving Day

OJ, Vatican Said To Sign Deal, Merge Hunts


Were Batboy, and Big Foot, accomplices of Simpson in his alleged armed robbery?

Sorry Elvis, Tests Prove Bat Boy Love Child Of President Bush Is The Winner ... The Results - The Garlic's Weekly Poll

We tried to give him an edge. We kept the poll open an extra day, so that, maybe, his legions of fans would swoop in to vote him to the top of the list.

We, so much, wanted to have a blazing headline - Elvis Caught On NSA Wiretaps! Plans Comeback - With Lindsey Lohan!

We did it to tie into today, this day, the anniversary day, when the King left us ... The Day Elvis Died.

But in heavy, and spirited voting, cooler heads prevailed ... The one's with their fingers on the pulse ... The one's who know came out on top ...

And the winner is ... Tests Prove Bat Boy Love Child Of President Bush!

Who says it isn't true?

Sure would like to be a fly-on-the-wall during that press conference.

Who was the President in a tryst with? When and where? ... Was it his office wife, Condi Girl? ... Was there more going on, last year, than a mere neck rub with German Chancellor Angela Merkel? ...Did he and Tony Blair adopt? ... Is Bat Boy the reason Turd Blossom resigned? ... All those secret locations the Vice President was moving around to to, was that to keep Bat Boy out-of-sight?

I guess we'll have to wait for that final World Weekly News to give us the 411 ...

The Results - The Garlic's Weekly Poll August 7 - August 14, 2007

The World Weekly News is shutting down ... It's final headline should be ...

1. Tests Prove Bat Boy Love Child Of President Bush Tally 29%

2. Iowa Man Powers Car With Dead Wife's Hair Tally 22%

3. Space Aliens Warn, If Hillary Elected, Will Destroy Earth! Tally 21%

4. Elvis Caught On NSA Wiretaps! Plans Comeback - With Lindsey Lohan! Tally 19%

5. Bigfoot Says Has Secret Plan To End Energy Crises Tally 9%

This week’s Poll - Fearful of China, the Bush Grindhouse is calling Mattel's Toy Recall ...

Scroll up to the top right corner to place your vote

Bonus Links

Telegraph.co.uk: What if Elvis Presley had never been born?

Goodbye Bat Boy! ... Rumors True, World Weekly News Shutting Down!