"They Don't Like Me! ... They Really Don't Like Me! ...

No, I don't expect we'll hear Make-Up Mitt Romney squeal like Sally Fields, but the word is out that he is, pretty much, despised by his fellow Republican candidates.

The NYT today, in their account, "Romney Leads in Ill Will Among G.O.P. Candidates", lays it out;

"Never get into a wrestling match with a pig,” Senator John McCain said in New Hampshire this month after reporters asked him about Mr. Romney. “You both get dirty, and the pig likes it.”

That it might make Make-Up Mitt rap again, breaking into an improvised "Who Let The Pigs Out - Oink Oink", remains to be seen, and, the timing of this article should make for an interesting sidebar, in tonight's GOP Florida Debate (with the dreadful duo of Little Timmy Russert and Brian Williams moderating once again).

With Rudy911 slipping into oblivion, he may be the only one that will suck up to Make-Up Mitt, if the others, openly, show their dislike and contempt for him.

Mustang Bobby, over on Shakespeare's Sister, doesn't see McCain offering any platitudes;

"It must be especially galling to John McCain who went through the 2000 primary against just such an opponent, got his head handed to him by Karl Rove, and paid his dues by sucking up to Bush and Company over the last eight years, leaving him with the feeling that if anyone is entitled to be the next Republican president, it should be him. Then in walks this matinée idol with a political pedigree and the same simplistic nostrums about a CEO presidency and "Washington is broken" that worked so well for the last guy, and the GOP voters are eating it up. No wonder McCain's pissed."

And Steve Benen, from The Carpetbagger Report, nails it with his "Mitt Romney and the Eddie Haskell Phenomenon";

"For practically an entire year now, the various campaigns have gone up and down, but in every instance, there was Romney, in their face and presenting himself to voters like an ingratiating, toadying Eddie Haskell."

You can almost bet, Make-Up Mitt will keep smiling through it, but, if they do gang up on him, let's hope, for the Mittster's sake, he doesn't get rattled, go into Robo-Mitt mode, and, an attempt to pander to the Floridians, saying something like he saw his father march with Anita Bryant, or worse, Castro, alienating the Cuban GOP.

He does have a track record of getting flustered and flubbing his lines in debates.


More Madcap Make-Up Mitt

Romney Speech: Where's Leonard Pinth Garnell When You Really Need Him?

This Just In! Romney Backs McCain In Wanting To "Shoot Obama"; Says Consulted Sons About Using Deadly Force; Hopes Opportunity Comes Before Primaries

Top Ten Cloves: Things About Mitt Romney's Announcement To Run For President

“Who Let The Dogs Out?” ... Mitt, Did You Check The Roof of The Car?

“Who Let The Dogs Out?”

God, it it moments like this, during campaigns, that really, despite whether you care for the candidate, or not, makes you feel embarrassed for them.

Time will tell if this was Willard M. Romney's "Dukakis-in-a-tank" moment, or John Kerry's windsurfing adventure (and, to keep it in this season, Mike Huckabee's "Elmer Fudd" hunting gear photo shoot)

But getting back to the man-for-all-positions (just not at the same time, or, necessarily, in order), we can stand down Leonard Pinth Garnell, regarding Make-Up Mitt's less-then-spirited foray into rap music today.

No doubt, Mr. Garnell would have had inveighed, with phrases such as "Astonishingly ill-chosen!", "Unrelentingly bad!" and, to wrap it up, "Really bit the big one!"

And, oh, the irony ...

Whatever possessed Make-Up Mitt to come up, in his MTV moment, with that song?

Oh all the songs ... Rap, Hip-Hop ... Show tunes ... Whatever, pick any genre ...

“Who Let The Dogs Out?”

From the man who strapped the family dog to the roof of the family car...

The incident: dog excrement found on the roof and windows of the Romney station wagon. How it got there: Romney strapped a dog carrier — with the family dog Seamus, an Irish Setter, in it — to the roof of the family station wagon for a twelve hour drive from Boston to Ontario, which the family apparently completed, despite Seamus's rather visceral protest.

Some days, this stuff just writes itself ...


Bonus Make-Up Mitt Woofs!

Watch the CBS News Video of Mitt and his Who Let The Dogs Out Moment

Who Let the Dogs out??- Baha men Original version

dday: Uptight White Guy Out Of His Element Alert

Breaking News! Romney On Debate Gaffe: "Meant To Say I Would Consult With My Sons"; Candidate Feverishly Works To Correct Impression; Campaign Said To Be Firing All Its' Lawyers

Is John Boehner Consulting The Romney Campaign, Giving Make-Up Mitt Crying Lessons?

Top Ten Cloves: Other People Mitt Romney Saw His Father With

















"I can sing "How Much Is That Doggie In The Window" instead, if you want ..."

Top Ten Cloves: Other People Mitt Romney Saw His Father With

News Item: Romney never saw father on King march; Defends figurative words; evidence contradicts story

10. The first Super Bowl... I still have the picture in my head, Dad standing there, arm-and-arm, with Max McGee

9. Margaret Mead... I was very young, and it was on a dig in some foreign country ... I can still see, both of them, in their dirty khakis

8. U Thant... I believe that I saw Dad be the first person to greet him at the United Nations

7. Charlton Heston... In the early 60's, I think it was on the set of "The Greatest Story Ever Told" that I saw them ... If Dad were still alive, I can see him, at the NRA convention - who has endorsed me, by the way - handing Mr. Heston the "cold dead hands" rifle

6. John Glenn... It's so crystal clear, that I could swear Dad was on the first orbit with him

5. Miles Davis... It was just before 'Bitches Brew' came out ... Not many people saw it, but Dad was an old hipster ...

4. Ian Smith, the Rhodesian Prime Minister... In fact, as I remember seeing, Dad had, kind of, a Mormon Prophecy, and told Smith that the country would, some day, have a name like "Zimbaby", or something like that ...

3. Hank Aaron ... Dad was there the big night, No. 715... Almost can see Dad himself, hitting that homerun

2. Abba Eban ... I can still see them, like they were standing here today ... Dad told Eban, he could wrap things in in five, or six-days

1. I can see it clearly... August 15, 1965 ... Shea Stadium... Dad up there with The Beatles ...


Bonus Make-Up (and Made-Up) Mitt Riffs

Steve Benen/Crooks and Liars: Romney’s tall tale about MLK

Josh Marshall: Saw in the Sense of Imagined

TBogg: Black History Month with Rahsaan Roland Romney

Andrew Sullivan: It Gets Better

Is John Boehner Consulting The Romney Campaign, Giving Make-Up Mitt Crying Lessons?

Romney Speech: Where's Leonard Pinth Garnell When You Really Need Him?


















Well ... Mitt would have seen his Dad there ... But, what the hey, he got the NRA endorsement, anyway ...

Is John Boehner Consulting The Romney Campaign, Giving Make-Up Mitt Crying Lessons?

Maybe there's a product endorsement deal from Kleenex?

Make-Up Mitt Romney has been bawling his eyes out lately. If it gets any worse, someone will remake the movie and title it "Play Romney For Me".

Joe Gandelman, over at The Moderate Voice offers a good post today - "Advice For Mitt Romney: Beware Of Too Much Crying";

"Romney first misted up when recalling how he felt when he heard his LDS Church admitted blacks to the priesthood in 1978. And, then, a day later, he misted up when he talked about how he felt in seeing a casket of a fallen soldier killed in Iraq and imagining it could have been one of his sons.

Fortunately for Romney, his two eye-mistings in two days happened when Jay Leno and David Lettermen were in re-runs due to the writers’ strike. And there is a larger political danger."

But Joe doesn't offer, perhaps, the only explanation - Is John Boehner now a consultant for the Romney campaign? Is he giving Make-Up Mitt crying lessons?

Boehner is the reigning champ of crying, flooding the House floor on numerous occasions this past year.

Must be a new, macho thing ... Something along the lines of "Real men eat quiche ... Real men cry ..."

I wonder if Make-Up Mitt cried, after discovering he left the family dog on the roof of the car, on a long road trip?

Romney seems to be taking on the persona of our Court Appointed President (h/t Barry Crimmins), pulling the "you can't criticize me" routine.

He cried and whined about people picking on him because he is a Mormon, so much to the point, that he just had to do something about it.

Building it up like he was going to lay it all on-the-line, sucking up comparisons to JFK, and his 1960 Catholic speech, Make-Up Mitt went out, stayed as far away from Mormonism as he could (only mentioning the word "Mormon" once), and delivered a clunker of a boiler-plate speech on faith.

While most of the MSM is treating Romney's fast food faith speech last week (see The Garlic's "Romney Speech: Where's Leonard Pinth Garnell When You Really Need Him?") like it was the "Song of Bernadette", both Lawrence O'Donnell (twice, having to fight back against an onslaught of double-barreled criticism) and Frank Rich saw through it.

So Make-Up Mitt has to up-the-ante (or, perhaps he forgot to cry during his speech), and get all misty with Little Timmy Russert, on 'Meet The Press', telling of the first time he cried, about learning his church was now - suddenly - accepting of blacks;

I was driving home from, I think, it was law school, but I was driving home, going through the Fresh Pond rotary in Cambridge, Massachusetts. I heard it on the radio, and I pulled over and, and literally wept...

Hmmm ... I was born-and-raised in Cambridge, Massachusetts ... I wonder if Make-Up Mitt pulled over at the IHOP (though, it could have still been a Howard Johnson's back then) or the liquor store, because those were the two most prominent establishments on either side of the rotary (and he didn't say he pulled into the Fresh Pond Mall, which would have been about 200-ft from the rotary) and in the direction he would have been heading, going home, up to Belmont.

We should mention that the Fresh Pond Rotary, with its' heavy, peak-time traffic, where one could wait double-digit minutes before someone will let you through, has been known to frustrate drivers, perhaps, to the point of tears.

But we digress.

We're not here to talk about urban planning and gridlock, but rather to point out the continued pandering of Make-Up Mitt.

If he thinks he can pass off policy and positions by sprinkling a few tears on them, think again.

But then again, we already rated Make-Up Mitt's chances of winning the presidency;

"Hey, we do have 2000 as precedent, and, anyway, you'll likely see Elvis, with monkeys flying out of his ass, before that happens."

And, as it has been said, over and over, "Elvis has left the building".

But don't tell Make-Up Mitt that ... He might start crying again.


Bonus Make-Up Mitt Riffs (with no tears)

Ryan J. Davis: Lawrence O'Donnell was Right About Mormonism

Michael Scherer: "A vote for Romney is a vote for Satan"; Some members of the GOP's largest voting bloc, like Florida preacher Bill Keller, think a Mormon in the White House would mean more souls going to hell.

Top Ten Cloves: Disappointing Things Left Out of Mitt Romney's Mormon Speech Yesterday

Breaking News! Romney On Debate Gaffe: "Meant To Say I Would Consult With My Sons"; Candidate Feverishly Works To Correct Impression; Campaign Said To Be Firing All Its' Lawyers

"You question me? ... My faith is out to here!"

Romney Speech: Where's Leonard Pinth Garnell When You Really Need Him?

Yeah, we hit this last Friday with a Top Ten Clove offering, but it just isn't sitting right.

Instead of laying it all out there about the Mormons, we got a dumpster-full of boiler-plate bullshit, the kind of campaign speech typically reserved for one of those Main Street, USA, 7AM Politics-and-Pancakes event.

If you listened to, primarily, the mainstream media punditry, and/or the Rightwing Freakshow, you may be lead to believe that Willard Mitt Romney, Republican panderer for President, gave a speech that ended war, famine, found a cure for cancer and otherwise, came off like an old Coca Cola commercial ("I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony ...").

Where was the droll Leonard Pinth Garnell when you really needed him, for this was, surely, an episode of "Bad Political Theatre" if there ever was one.

Pinth could have warned us, ever so slyly, indicating we were about to see a "a monumentally ill-advised, exquisitely awful, unrelentingly bad, pandering orgy of the highest order, drenched in self-importance, inflated with an astounding eye towards nothingness and dripping, so sweetly, with intolerance, it will make a bigots spine tingle ..."

Hosannas are being hoisted and the word "Presidential", and that "he looked Presidential", is being flung around like it was a Frisbee convention.

Listen to this dreck from 'The Boston Globe';

"Mitt Romney's highly anticipated religion speech yesterday was a political tour de force, rejecting the notion that he'd be bound as president by the leaders of his Mormon Church but also placing his faith among the many religions that constitute the "moral heritage" of the United States."

"Tour de Force? Moral Heritage?"

Peggy Noonan, that aging #1 Reagan Groupie, every so aching for a New Gipper, blew this wet kiss to Make-up Mitt;

"Mr. Romney gave the speech Thursday morning. How did he do?

Very, very well. He made himself some history. The words he said will likely have a real and positive impact on his fortunes. The speech's main and immediate achievement is that foes of his faith will now have to defend their thinking, in public. But what can they say to counter his high-minded arguments? "Mormons have cooties"?

It was a 40-minute-plus game of dodge ball, not even in the same ballpark of talking anything remotely close about Mormonism. No Joseph Smith banners on that stage. In fact, Make-Up Mitt only uttered the word "Mormon" once.

"Made himself some history?"

It was a Mad Lib, fill-in-the-blank stump speech, of the most generic terms, on Religion and Beliefs, not the bombshell, clear-the-decks, cover-your-childs' eyes, discourse on Mormonism.

He, and his campaign staff (the one's left not pretending to be a cop), knew that couldn't get the wall-to-wall, live, cable news coverage if Make-Up Mitt was going to prattle on about a cult (though, it could have been of interest to MSNBC, for the Doc-Bloc specials)

Lawrence O'Donnell, taking some heat for his comments yesterday on the McLaughlin Group was on-target with;

"This was the worst political speech of my lifetime. Because this man stood there and said to you "this is the faith of my fathers." And you, and none of these commentators who liked this speech realized that the faith of his fathers is a racist faith. As of 1978 it was an officially racist faith, and for political convenience in 1978 it switched. And it said "OK, black people can be in this church." He believes, if he believes the faith of his fathers, that black people are black because in heaven they turned away from God, in this demented, Scientology-like notion of what was going on in heaven before the creation of the earth."

Here's a few gems from Make-Up Mitt;

"Freedom requires religion just as religion requires freedom. Freedom opens the windows of the soul so that man can discover his most profound beliefs and commune with God. Freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone.

"I believe that every faith I have encountered draws its adherents closer to God. And in every faith I have come to know, there are features I wish were in my own: I love the profound ceremony of the Catholic Mass, the approachability of God in the prayers of the Evangelicals, the tenderness of spirit among the Pentecostals, the confident independence of the Lutherans, the ancient traditions of the Jews, unchanged through the ages, and the commitment to frequent prayer of the Muslims. As I travel across the country and see our towns and cities, I am always moved by the many houses of worship with their steeples, all pointing to heaven, reminding us of the source of life's blessings.

WOW!

Move over, Elmer Gantry, there's a new healer in town!

And that is was calculated to "end the discussion", as to his Mormonism, is extremely lame, or, as Leonard Pinth Garnell might say, "Astonishingly ill-chosen!"

That he can get away with an extended photo-op and now he's untouchable?

If, and it's big, huge, monumental "if", Romney does get elected (Hey, we do have 2000 as precedent, and, anyway, you'll likely see Elvis, with monkeys flying out of his ass, before that happens), you better get your God on ... And it better be the "right" God, or your toast.

"We separate church and state affairs in this country, and for good reason. No religion should dictate to the state nor should the state interfere with the free practice of religion. But in recent years, the notion of the separation of church and state has been taken by some well beyond its original meaning. They seek to remove from the public domain any acknowledgment of God. Religion is seen as merely a private affair with no place in public life. It is as if they are intent on establishing a new religion in America – the religion of secularism. They are wrong.

More On Make-Up Mitt's Holier-Than-Thou Stump Speech

Pam's House Blend: Mitt's pious bullsh*t

The Carpetbagger Report: Did Romney’s speech work?

Lee Harris: How and Why Romney Bombed

Maureen Dowd: Mitt’s No J.F.K.

Matthew Yglesias: Romney's Terrible Speech

Top Ten Cloves: Disappointing Things Left Out of Mitt Romney's Mormon Speech Yesterday

News Item: Romney's speech over. Didn't say squat

10. Make it a Federal crime for anyone to repeat the story of him driving around with his dog on the roof of his car

9. Speculation that he say he's moving all the White House, Congress, and government's business to Salt Lake City

8. Many were hopeful that he'd give the word that BYU graduates will be his choice to fill the Justice Department with

7. His first order of business as President would be to mandate that HBO produce and air 'Big Love" throughout his presidency

6. For sure, though we'd hear that he'll definitely double the size of Guantanamo

5. If elected, all the Presidential portraits hanging in the White House would be replaced with ones of Joseph Smith

4. Continue the Bush policy of Illegal Wiretapping and get all those Mosques wired-up

3. He would streamline visas for his old landscaping company, so they could come down and work the White House grounds

2. That he would add Evangelical Christians to the list, along with Muslims, of people who won't be in his cabinet

1. Didn't announce, if elected, will embrace polygamy and have 19 First Ladies


Bonus Make-Up Mitt Links

Chris Cillizza: Romney's "Faith in America" Speech: What Worked and What Didn't

Michael Scherer: "A vote for Romney is a vote for Satan"; Some members of the GOP's largest voting bloc, like Florida preacher Bill Keller, think a Mormon in the White House would mean more souls going to hell.

Retro Garlic: I'm Surprised It Wasn't Headlined As "Mormon Candidate Ties To Cosmetic Industry Exposed"


If elected, will Mitt Romney move the government to Salt Lake City?