Monday, October 09, 2006

Weekend Special - Sautéed Cloves 8 October 2006

The White House has offered no comment on a recent campaign snafu, when President Bush appeared with Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA).

Santorum stunned the President, his staff and the supporters in attendance when he tied Saddam Hussein and Al Qaeda into the Congressional Page Scandal, saying that he has evidence supporting the charge that "Saddam, if he didn't have one already, was working on building a page sex scandal to deploy here in the United States"

Fox News Host Sean Hannity leveled charges in the Congressional Sex Scandal at the feet of " New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin", charging Nagin ignored it, and "failed to use the hundreds of buses to get the pages out of harms way"

Embattled House Speaker Denny Hastert (R-IL) announced today that, in addition to the House Ethics investigation, and the FBI, Hastert has contracted American Revolutionary War re-enactors to look into the "page sex scandal

Afghanistan President Hamid Karzai disclosed that his recent visit to Washington was sponsored by Coca-Cola, saying that it has been a life-long dream "to teach the world to sing"

While in Washington, Karzai met with New Orleans Saints fan, Penalty Man, who President Bush is considering conscripting into the military service and sending him over to Iraq, believing he may be able to curb the growing violence by "what else, issuing penalties against the terrorists and insurgents".

Under an agreement with the Iraqi Government, after receiving three penalties, the offending person will have to sit out of the violence for one-month. Five penalties in a one-year period will bring about a complete banishment from the Iraq Civil War

In Washington this weekend,
with calls growing louder for his resignation, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld received an unexpected boost, when Captain America and Spiderman dropped by to declare their support for Rumsfeld

Said Rumsfeld, "Am I pleased to get this endorsement? ... You bet'cha ... Will you see me in tights and a cape? ... Now, wouldn't that be something ..."

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