Friday, October 13, 2006

Developing Story! Rove Has Gone From “Bush’s Brain” To “Bush’s Drain”

White House In Crises, As Rove Takes Credit For North Korean Nuke Test

Sources Say ‘Bush’s Brain” Weary From Sinking Polls, Fundraising; Too Tired To Come Up With New October Surprise

Sources have told The Garlic that a brutal and bitter flare-up is occurring inside the White House, as top Bush Aide Karl Rove has been “boasting” to colleagues and GOP officials that the recent North Korean test of a nuclear device was his work, this years’ “October Surprise” that Rove has become famous for pulling out of his infamous playbook.

Numerous sources have reported on Rove, making his rounds around Capital Hill, taking credit for the recent, alleged nuclear test by the North Korean government.

During his appearances at GOP fundraisers, Rove is, reportedly, opening up his speeches with a greeting, in mangled, choppy Korean, that translates to “You wanted an October Surprise, I give you an October Surprise”, and then launches into talking points, based on national security, that Republican candidates can use in their campaigns.

He wanted to take Iraq off the table for the upcoming Midterms,” said a highly-placed official on Capital Hill. “That he did, but then this Foley Scandal hit and he didn’t have anything left in his bag of tricks to suppress it ... It’s all blown him, Bush and the Republicans out of the water.”

With the attempts to foist the Foley scandal at the feet of the Democrats falling flat, it’s possible, offered the source, that “this nuke thing is the backside - no pun intended - of resolving the Foley mess.”

“They’re going to need some cover in purging the Congress of the gay staffers,” predicted the source. “They’ll throw in a few top aides and, perhaps, a congressman or two - if the Midterms don’t bury them first.”

What is being seen as insurance, but not something Rove can claim as a bonafide “October Surprise” was the news out of the White House last week that President Bush is considering awarding the disgraced, former Congressman Foley the Medal of Freedom Award.

Rove Boast Pits Him Against Secretary of State Rice On North Korea Issue

While the buzz is growing of Rove’s “October Surprise”, others in the Capital are dismissive of it, indicating it would “open a can of worms” if it were the case.

Earlier this week, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice went on record, giving credit to the Bush Administration’s ‘Axis of Evil” program, calling it “wildly successful”, for the North Korean nuclear situation and used the report to point out her claims three-years ago of “mushroom clouds” were valid.

If a rift has developed between Rice and Rove, it won’t be the first head butt with administration colleagues for the Secretary of State.

Earlier this year, Rice got into a shouting match with U.N. Ambassador John Bolton, over her admission of “thousands of errors” in regard to the invasion and occupation of Iraq.

The Secretary of State also ran into trouble with President Bush, after Rice initially claimed surprise over the election of the Hamas party in the Palestinian elections, later backtracking her statement to back up the President, who had said he was surprised the levees in New Orleans broke.

“This has the makings of a classic White House battle,” offered David Aaronson, editor of 'What Color Is My Coat Today?', the Capital Hill Newsletter that tracks politicians who turn on their own party.

“The President’s longest loyal aide versus his favorite loyal aide ... We’re talking pay-per-view level fighting here.”

Rove Has Gone From “Bush’s Brain” To “Bush’s Drain”

Another critic, Holly Martins, Publisher of Axis of Evil Illustrated, a quarterly publication, that is rumored to be a house magazine for the Project for The New American Century, is dismissive of Rove and his claim of an “October Surprise”.

“We’ve been hearing that Rove’s burnt out,” offered Martins. “Yeah, sure, he’s raised over $12-million for the GOP this election year, but it’s taking a toll on him ... He’s clearly tired and ineffective, when you look at all that’s going on ... He’s gone from “Bush’s Brain” to “Bush’s Drain.”

Martins also points to the Inspector General report earlier this year, that cited the Bush Administration as being “out of strategies” as an indication that Rove could not have coordinated the North Korean situation.

‘The Bush Team had this covered a long time ago ... Before they even took office ... North Korea is Bill Clinton’s fault, so it doesn’t make sense that Rove would try to take credit for it. He’s veering off his own playbook, which could be a sign of just how bad things are inside the West Wing.”

In a related matter, in his continuing efforts to distance himself from the growing scandal, House Leader Dennis Hastert (R-IL) declared himself today, the October Surprise and vowed to stay on and earn the title of “November Surprise” as well.

More on this story as new developments surface

With his latest effort, to take credit for the North Korean Nuclear Test and passing it off as his "October Surprise", critics say that Karl Rove as gone from being "Bush's Brain" to "Bush's Drain"

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