Saturday, February 03, 2007

Our Girl Condi Gets A Theme Song - Neocons and Lovers

Well, Well, Well ...

After being pushed back into the shadows, first by our Decider, make that Decision-Maker's, New Way Forward Surge Speech, and then his sans-New Orleans, Civilian Reserves Corp-laden SOTU, and following that, we had Vice President Darth Vader making his splash, beating down Wolf Blitzer and topping his "final throes" with declaring our Iraq Occupation to be "enormous success", and sandwiched in there was the First Lady and Liz Cheney picking on poor Condi.

What's our top globe-trotting, piano-playing, error-admitting diplomat to do?

If you're Super Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, you grab the cover of the latest U.S. edition of Time Magazine, perhaps as a forerunner to a statement declaring 2007 as "Year of the Condi".

The puff piece "The Weight Of The World" certainly paints poor Condi as caught between a rock-and-a-hard place and how-could-that-happen-to-someone-so-brilliant?

And in a second article, an interview "This Can Be Done Through Diplomacy", no doubt she'll be standing on the carpet in the Oval Office, having to explain to Dubya" why she's reading from the Iraq Study Group pages and not his.

Yet, while not ready to go off with Cheney and Rumsfield to one their Armageddon Retreats, Our Girl Condi is putting Dubya's legacy ahead of hers and is dancing the beat of the Surge.

Maybe she is a Neocon, dressed in diplomat's clothing.

So, while The Garlic has, on many occasions, put the musical spotlight on the two people who keep getting in Condi's way - Bush and Cheney, we decided that Condi needed some theme music to call her own.

Inspired by a recent Song Parody contest, The Garlic cues up the "Wives and Lovers", retitled for the occasion to "Neocon and Lovers".

Neocons and Lovers

Hey, little Condi
Comb your hair, fix your make-up
Soon he will open the door.
Don't think because
Theres a surge in Iraq,
You needn't try any more

For Neocons should always be lovers, too.
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you.
I'm warning you.

Day after day,
There's Cheney in his office,
And men will always be men.
Don't send him off
With your hair still in curlers.
You may not see him again.

For Neocons should always be lovers, too.
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you.
Hes almost here.

Hey, little Condi
Better wear something pretty,
Something you'd wear to go to the Sit-Room.
And dim all the lights,
Pour the lies, start the spinning.
Time to get ready for Iran.

Oh, time to get ready,
Time to get ready,
Time to get ready
For Iran.


Time Magazine - "The Weight Of The World"

Time Magazine - "This Can Be Done Through Diplomacy"

Rice's Rhetoric, in Full Retreat

Miss J's Newsvine Parody Contest - Song Lyrics

Top Ten Cloves: Things About Condoleezza Rice Becoming NFL Commissioner

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