Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Top Ten Cloves: Other Ways Hillary Clinton Can Ignore She Lost Primary Race

News Item: In Defeat, Clinton Graciously Pretends to Win

10. Go around with her fingers in her ears, shouting out "Na, Na, Na, Na Na" ... "I can't hear you" ... "Na, Na, Na, Na Na"

9. Spend the days ahead sending messages, to herself, that "Hillary Won" on HillaryClinton.Com

8. Start parsing the word "lost", being, "It depends on what the meaning of the word 'lost' is"

7. Could have husband and daughter led her around, blindfolded, and wearing earplugs

6. Clarify her statement "anything can happen" to include, "Except her losing the primary to Obama"

5. Listen, and listen only to Terry McAuliffe and Lanny Davis

4. Keep baselessly claiming, she's won the popular vote, she's won more states, she's won the swing states, she's won ...

3. Install, in her home and office, one of those gameshow soundproof booths

2. Dodge the news that she lost, the same way she dodged all that sniper fire

1. Cry and throw a crying tantrum until Barack Obama, and the DNC, say "Okay, we'll let you win it"

Bonus "It's Not How You Play The Game, But How You Lose" Links

Anonymous Liberal: Clinton's Classless Speech

Michael Crowley: In the Clinton Bunker

Noam Scheiber: That Outrageous, Delusional Clinton Speech

Andrew Sullivan: The Clintons Threaten

Chris Cillizza: What Went Wrong for Clinton?

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