The Garlic: Conservatives

Showing posts with label Conservatives. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Ahhh, Ross, They're Hacks Too!

It's nice to see our Ignorant Dolts working, pushing, going at it with vigor, to maintain their dubious status.

Case-in-point this week is the Little-Billy-Kristol-Replacement-Model over at the New York Times, Ross Douthat.

Ross weighed in lamenting about the travails, and sinking ratings of CNN, offering some of his sterling advice.

In it, he stated this;

But not the “Crossfire” of 2004. CNN overreacted to Jon Stewart’s jeremiad, but he wasn’t entirely wrong. The show was years removed from its Michael Kinsley/Pat Buchanan glory days, and its liberal hosts at the time, Begala and James Carville, really were Democratic Party hacks. (The conservatives, Carlson and Robert Novak, were much more independent-minded, but the constant need to rebut partisan talking points took its toll on them as well.)

Whoa, hold the phone!

The liberals are hacks, but the conservatives, Tucker Carlson and Robert Novak, are not?

We're talking about 50% of the old "Errors and No Facts" writing team, the guy who had his head up the Bush Grindhouse's ass, helping them out Valerie Plame, not to mention, his mowing down pedestrians on the streets of Washington.

And the little bow-tied He-Man, he consistently threw partisan hand grenades, even going to the point of his "Right Wing" verision of Huffington Post.

You're just playing the old, "IOKIYAR" card there, Ross.

And, The Garlic wasn't the only one to have a little trouble with his column.

Glenn Greenwald took Douthat to school, for erroneously trying to label Rachel Maddow as a hack (which, to his credit, he tried to pull that one back).

Wonkette slapped him around, as well.

Keep at it Ross ...

We knew, early on, putting you on our Ignorant Dolt roster, you wouldn't let us down.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Top Ten Cloves: Signs That Your Neighbor May Be Attending CPAC

News Item: The New Conservative Hierarchy

10. Learning Spanish, in case they get to meet Mark Rubio

9. Saw them furiously scribbling notes on the palm of their hands

8. Praying, that on their flight to CPAC, Kevin Smith isn't on same plane

7. They have a "No Teleprompter Zone" sign posted on their lawn

6. Breathlessly hoping, since she sold her company, that Michelle Malkin has time to stalk them

5. Admitted that they have volunteered to let Dick, or Liz, Cheney torture them

4. Making plans to touch Mitt Romney's hair

3. Witnessed them breaking in heavy work boots, so they can stomp on Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews

2. Since RNC meet with Teabaggers, plans on lobbying to have Lewis and Clark Tea Party hang Senator Patty Murray at CPAC

1. Watched them take batting practice, to tune up for whacking the Nancy Pelosi piñata

Bonus CPAC Riffs

Kate Zernike: CPAC Speaker Bashes Obama, in Racial Tones

Eve Conant - This Week in Conservative Media: 'Air America Has Shut Down and Gitmo Is Still Open'

Media Matters - Erickson: Media Matters employees are "the guys who can't get jobs anywhere else"

Media Matters - Armey: "The number 1 biggest problem in America is the physical size of this government"

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Top Ten Cloves: Reasons Rush Limbaugh Bragged About Success of Operation Chaos

News Item: Rush Limbaugh urges vote for Obama

10. Simply a matter of he's so delusional, he bought his own hype and now is, legitimately, backing Obama

9. Wanted to get it in the news cycle, before the wide release of 'Speed Racer'

8. Still positioning himself to incite riots in Denver

7. Ratings are dipping

6. Feeling itchy, he wants to get back to racially smearing Obama

5. Dittoheads were becoming confused on who they are supposed to vote for

4. Now that his crush is out in the open, he's trying to woo Hillary

3. Running out of material ... Wants to recycle his Donovan McNabb comments and apply them to Obama

2. Pad the resume, for when he lobbies - again - for the Nobel Peace Prize

1. What! ... Oh no, he's popping the pills again ...

Bonus "A Cheeseburger That Sweats" Riffs

Sourcewatch - Rush Limbaugh

Media Matters: Limbaugh joins other media in whitewashing Swift Boat Vets' falsehoods, claims "nobody has disproven anything they claimed"

Crooks and Liars: Limbaugh At It Again - Mocks Voice Of 12 Year Old Graeme Frost

Jon Soltz: So I'm a "Phony Soldier," Rush?

We Wonder If Rush Lobbied For This, The Way He Did For The Nobel?

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Last Nights' Dress Boy Sticks His Neck Out

Boy, this took a lot of courage ... And what prescience!

Move over Nostradamus, there's a new kid on the block ...

Maybe he has a "feeling" on how the Cubs are going to do this season ... Or, does he already know who our next president will be? ... Or perhaps, he's holding high over our guilty pleasures, teasing those around him, smug with the knowledge of who is this season's American Idol winner?

Drum roll, please ...

Prediction [Jonah Goldberg]

"In the next few days, there will be a wave of liberals — Frank Rich comes particularly to mind — who will use WFB's memory to beat up on today's conservatives ..."

Whoa! ... Ya think so?

Well, Commissar Goldberg, you don't have to wait that long ... And you don't have to worry about "today's conservatives" ...Beating up on Buckley himself will do just fine ...

Barry Crimmins - Burial Right

Dennis Perrin - Socked In The God Damned Face (with bonus videos of Noam Chomsky schooling Little Billy)

Bonus Links

"The morning after always looks grim if you happen to be wearing last night's dress"

Timothy Noah/Slate: Am I a Fascist? Jonah Goldberg's tendentious history of liberalism

Lawyers, Guns and Money: Dear Jonah: I Am Not Serious, Either