Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain Lays Odds He'll Suspend His Campaign Again

Maybe he shook hands with Ms. Ya'Bet'cha last week, and hasn't washed since, the ink from her hand causing some level of brain-swelling.

Or maybe, he's just hitting the Stupid Juice again (as he must have done, two-years ago, when he chose The Wasilla Whiz Kid as his running mate).



The Hill has a report today, that Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain "can draw a scenario" that President Obama is going to fall on his knees, beg the PartyofNoicans for forgiveness, and completely repeal, and rewrite, the Healthcare Reform bill to their liking.

"If the intensity level is as high as it is, I can draw you a scenario where the president would be forced to repeal or really replace it with the provisions [Republicans] wanted," McCain said in an interview with KFYI 550.

At the very least, Republicans could refuse to fund healthcare, the Arizona Republican added.

"You could basically repeal major provisions of it" by refusing to fund them, McCain said.

By the time the Midterms roll around, the only one's carping about the Healthcare Reform Bill will be the PartyofNoicans, and their army of Teabagger puppets.

And, besides, McCain will break his own pledge, of doing nothing for the rest of the year.

I don't know, if he starts dropping in the polls, I smell a "crises" brewing, and that means McCain may have to suspend his campaign, again.


Bonus Stumblin' Bumblin' McCain Riffs

The Bob Dole For The New Millennium

"The insinuation, that John McCain, a former prisoner of war, doesn't know how many houses he has, is outrageous!"

Everything He Learned?

Save This Snapshot!

Koo-koo-ka-choo, John, the Maverick Man
Palin loves you more than you will know
God bless you, please, John, the Maverick Man.
Heaven holds a place for those who bomb away,
Hey, hey, hey

Where have you gone, Joe the faux Plumber,
Our Campaign turns it's lonely eyes to you.
What's that you say, John, the Maverick Man.
Revoltin' Joe has left and gone away,
Yea, Yea, Yea,
Yea, Yea, Yea!

Yes, save this, mark this down, for it encompasses, almost, the perfect snapshot, the finger-on-the-button, a dead-ringer in horseshoes, the milieu, imprint, definition of the Stumblin' Bumblin' John McKKKain campaign.

Joe The Plumber Stands Up John McCain?



Now, either the staff told the Stumblin' Bumblin' Fly Boy that Joe "Living-Way-Outside-His-YouTube-Moment" the Plumber wasn't in attendance, and he "forgot", or, the Rove Rats never bothered to make sure the fawned-over Flying Monkey was front-and-center, to be foisted on the bused-in audience of school children (this is the second time he's abused students, forcing them to sit through one of his campaign events, perhaps, in a vein attempt to sprinkle and plant new "My Friends" seeds; Or, in the case today, to avoid the embarrassment of not having a quorum of an audience) .

Actually, it may be a combination of both.

McCain forgets that Joe the Plumber isn’t at his rally: ‘Where is Joe?’

Update - McCain staffers tell ABC News that it was "a simple mix up" and Joe "will join the campaign at a Thursday evening event."

Update - Dana Bash updates:

McCain aides called it a “miscommunication,” but once I got on the bus I called Wurzelbacher myself and asked him what really happened. He told me that he had hoped to come to the morning rally, but that no one from McCain’s campaign ever called him back to confirm, Bigger ooops.

Well, that kind of diamond-drilling precision sure ought'a rope in more votes.

No doubt you've seen or heard all the news on this bald buffoon, from his "mulling over" running for Congress, to the latest wet dream of a recording contract (Apparently, Nashville has plans to start stamping out new Lee Greenwoods, rivaling the schedule of Chinese toy factories), to his foot-in-mouth policy discussion the other day, that even the Faux News guys couldn't swallow.

I'm beginning to believe that the only reason the debunked Maverick clings to this ignorant clump of ridiculousness, is to bookend him with his sterling VP choice, Mommy Moose.

Peas-in-a-pod, as it were ...

Boy, if they really wanted to make heads explode, sit The Wasilla Whiz Kid, and Joe the Dumber, down, together, for a Katie Couric interview.

They'd be scrapping up brain matter, from "sea, to shining sea".

And There Was Also This

It might serve the voting public better, if Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnnie just finished off the campaign wearing clown shoes.

Remember a short time ago, when the Dead Campaign Express was regaling themselves with calling Obama a "celebrity", complete with the "Paris Hilton" video.

I mean, they just couldn't get enough of that, entertaining themselves, so smug that they were pinning something on Obama that would surely sink his campaign.

It was all kittens-with-a-ball-of-string, those heady, "celebrity" days.

Well, later in the day, Joe the Dumber did show up.

Joe the Plumber shows at McCain rally

"By the way…shouldn’t we hear from our celebrity Joe, just a second, Joe Wurzelbacher?”

"All right guys, I didn't prepare anything," Wurzelbacher said. "The only thing I've been saying is just get out and get informed. I mean really know what you're talking about when you're talking about it. Don't take everyone's opinions. I came to my own opinions by research. Get involved in the government. That way we can hold our politicians accountable and take back our government.”

"Our celebrity Joe"

Someone needs to check, were these people the model, the inspiration, for the film "Idiocracy"?

Must be the "electrolytes".


Bonus "Smokin' Joe" Riffs

Kyle E. Moore: IT’S ALIIIIIVE!!!!!!

Matthew DeLong: Where Have You Gone, Joe the Plumber?

Wonkette: Joe The Whore Shows Up At McCain Rally, Finally

TChris: Drains Unclogged, Peace Treaties Negotiated: Joe Does It All

Nicole Belle: Pushing To Extend Those Fifteen Minutes Of Fame

John Cole: Fifteen Minutes and Counting…

"From this day on, the official language of San Marcos will be Swedish ..."

El Presidente



Okay, not quite exactly what Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain pulled in his Spanish media interview, but, also, not too far off the path from the Woody Allen's "Bananas" clip above.

This is one of those things, that no matter how the Rove Rats attempt to explain away McCain's fog, it just doesn't cover him in Commander-Guy-In-Waiting, Mr.-Foreign-Policy-Expert, glory.

Since late last evening, the World Wide Web, with Josh Marshall being on top of it from the get-go, has been abuzz with this fascinating interview Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny conducted with Radio Caracol Miami.

Fly Boy seemed to get lost, not quite following along (and completely whiffing on the billboard-sized hint the interviewer tossed in his lap) when asked about meeting with Spain's Prime Minister, José Luis Rodríguez Zapatero, should he win the election.

Here's the relevant excerpt of the interview, from from The Raw Story;

INTERVIEWER: Senator finally, let’s talk about Spain. If elected president would you be willing to invite President Jose Rodriguez Louis Zapatero to the White House, to meet with you?

McCAIN: I would be willing to meet with those leaders who are friends and want to work with us in a cooperative fashion.

And by the way President Calderone of Mexico is fighting a very, very tough fight against the drug cartels. I’m glad we are now working with the Mexican government on the Merida Plan, and I intend to move forward with relations and invite as many of them as I can, of those leaders to the White House.

INTERVIEWER: Would that invitation be extended to the Zapatero government? To the president himself?

McCAIN: Uh, I don’t, I, ya know, I, honestly, I have to look at the situations and the relations and the priorities. But I can assure you, I will establish closer relations with our friends and I will stand up to those who want to do harm to the United States of America.

INTERVIEWER: So you have to wait and see. If he’s willing to meet with you, would you be able to do it? In the White House?

McCAIN: Well, again, I don’t — All I can tell you is I have a clear record of working with leaders in the hemisphere that are friends with us and standing up to those who are not. And that’s judged on the basis of the importance of our relationship with Latin America and the entire region.

INTERVIEWER: OK, what about Europe? I’m talking about the president of Spain.

McCAIN: What about me what?

INTERVIEWER: OK. Are you willing to meet with him if you are elected president?

McCAIN: I am willing to meet with any leader who is dedicated to the same principles and philosophy that we are for human rights, democracy and freedom, and I will stand up to those who are not.

To get a better feel for it, the good folks over at TPM have the interview, in a YouTube format;

McCain Answers Question on Spain, Zapatero

Notice the repeating of the answer, three times, similar to Mommy Moose, in her Charlie Gibson sit-down?

The Dead Campaign Express is already out there, saying it's nothing to break a sweat over.

McCain foreign policy adviser Randy Sheunemann said McCain's answer was intentional.

"The questioner asked several times about Senator McCain's willingness to meet Zapatero (and id'd him in the question so there is no doubt Senator McCain knew exactly to whom the question referred). Senator McCain refused to commit to a White House meeting with President Zapatero in this interview," he said in an e-mail.

It was intentional?

He's intentionally dissing a NATO ally?

Please ...

Let's put this in perspective, as Steve Benen does does, detailing some of Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny's other "intentional" statements;

Let's also not lose sight of the broader pattern. McCain thinks the recent conflict between Russia and Georgia was "the first probably serious crisis internationally since the end of the Cold War." He thinks Iraq and Pakistan share a border. He believes Czechoslovakia is still a country. He's been confused about the difference between Sudan and Somalia. He's been confused about whether he wants more U.S. troops in Afghanistan, more NATO troops in Afghanistan, or both. He's been confused about how many U.S. troops are in Iraq. He's been confused about whether the U.S. can maintain a long-term presence in Iraq. He's been confused about Iran's relationship with al Qaeda. He's been confused about the difference between Sunni and Shi'ia. McCain, following a recent trip to Germany, even referred to "President Putin of Germany." All of this incoherence on his signature issue.

This guy, increasingly, doesn't know whether to piss, or wind his watch!

Considering how he is dealing with the economy, I am a bit surprised that he didn't punt and babble that our "our fundamental relationship with Spain is strong".

Just keep him on simple statements, don't let him stray to far off the script.

Kind of like the scene, in 'The Manchurian Candidate', when Senator Iselin is complaining about having to remember how many communists there were.

Mrs. Iselin: [at meal time] I'm sorry, hon'. Would it really make it easier for you if we settled on just one number?
Sen. John Yerkes Iselin: Yeah. Just one, real, simple number that'd be easy for me to remember.
[Mrs. Iselin watches her husband thump a bottle of Heinz Tomato Ketchup onto his plate]
Sen. John Yerkes Iselin: [addressing the Senate] There are exactly 57 card-carrying members of the Communist Party in the Department of Defense at this time!

He would still be coming off as out-of-it, but it would be better off that, then coming off as having a senior moment, or worse.

It was suggested, by some, that his staff didn't brief, or prepare him well enough before the interview.

Could be, however, considering the strategy of "Lie, Lie, Lie", why spend time feeding him info that he, likely, and as evidenced in the interview, wouldn't keep a grasp of it, anyway.

Let him flap around, say whatever he says, then spin and lie about it after.

And this isn't, necessarily, an isolated incident, particularly, and ironically, with the Spanish media.

Check out John Aravosis, over on Americablog, and his "Senator McCain, Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still seriously dead", on an interview Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny did a few month ago.

We still have one more day before the weekend.

Between the strong economy that Stumblin Bumblin' Johnny sees, and this tremendous Spain gaffe, I don't know about you, but I smell a whopper of a POW-POW-POW story coming along ...


A Cavalcade of Links

Kevin Drum: A More Generous Interpretation of the McCain-Spain Gaffe

BooMan: McCain: Reckless or Senile?

Hilzoy: McCain Chose Vanity

Paul Campos: The reign in Spain falls mainly on McCain

Josh Marshall: Embarrassing

Warren Street: John McCain's Foreign Policy Credentials Take a Major Hit

Blue Girl: Call me old fashioned...

Pam Spaulding: Is McCain senile?

Brilliant at Breakfast: Senile dementia is not funny. It is also not trivial

Mas Que Nada ... McCain Goes Pow Pow Pow - Again!

Or: Donate To John McCain, and Be Included In The Telling of His Next POW-POW-POW Story

We told you so ...

In our post Sunday, "The Ultimate McCain POW Song", we said it would come again ("don't worry, it will be soon, very soon").

And, we didn't have to worry, or to wait much more than, roughly, 24-hours.

Hit with 'houses' on Leno, McCain cites POW experience and more

LENO: Welcome back, Sen. McCain, for one million dollars, how many houses do you have? (Jay laughs, McCain squirms and chuckles)

MCCAIN: You know, could I just mention to you, Jay, and a moment of seriousness. I spent five and a half years in a prison cell, without—I didn’t have a house, I didn’t have a kitchen table, I didn’t have a table, I didn’t have a chair. And I spent those five and a half years, because—not because I wanted to get a house when I got out. And you know, I’m very proud of Cindy’s father, he was a guy that barely got out of high school, fought in World War II in the Army Air Corps, came home and made a business and made the American dream and so somehow. You’ve had Cindy on this show ...

We spend our time in a condominium in Washington, a condominium in Phoenix, some time over here in the state of California, and then we have a place up in northern Arizona,’’ he said. And my friends, I’m proud of my record of service to this country, and it has nothing to do with houses. What it has to do with putting Americans in houses and keeping them in their homes.’

Jesus ...

In a softball setting like 'The Tonight Show', rather than banter, or shoot back a zinger to Leno, he stumbles and bumbles into robot-mode with the POW-POW-POW bullshit.

Not only that, but he's added a "fish story" element to it, an umbrella of sorts, extending the magic POW-POW-POW powers to his father-in-law.

I think he's on to something here, that, maybe, he shouldn't have let out of the bag like that ...

Fundraising!

We know he's been living, high-off-the-hog, on Cindy, her Daddy's scratch, but why settle for that?.

The Rove Rats, and Stumblin' Bumblin' McCain Campaign's next step can be to offer, for a certain-level donation, that "Senator McCain will include you in his next telling of his POW-POW-POW experience.

Christ, they let loose with that, and it will make Obama's prodigious fundraising look like lunch money.

NeoNitWits and jingoistic jackasses will come out of the woodwork, cash-in-hand, lapping it up like happy soup.

A little more than two-months left of campaigning, a POW-POW-POW story, a day (hey, you don't want to dilute it, after all) ... Charging a premium if he does it in an interview, national media, versus local ... Cable news versus network news ... Newspaper or magazine ...

Once again, as much of his life, Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain falls up the ladder.

He can go home, burst through all seven front doors and shout out "Cindy ... Honey ... You don't have to steal recipes anymore ... We hit the jackpot!"

Sergio Mendes & Brasil 66 - Mas Que Nada

The Ultimate McCain POW Song

I was looking to take it easy today.

A rough day, or two, on the homefront, and even worse, in the Allergy Department (I am beginning to resemble the Our Gang dog, Petey, with a black circle blossoming around my left eye, from rubbing and scratching it).

But these guys just don't get it.

I mean, Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain, and his gang of Rove Rats, just don't get it.

I believe we are entering the territory of, if it's a cloudy day on the campaign trail, for the Dead Campaign Express, they'll make some reference to McCain's POW status, like "He'd be grateful for a cloudy day ... He didn't get to see many clouds for nearly five-years, while he was in his prison hole ...".

On Saturday, newly-minted Vice Presidential candidate Joe Biden lobbed a great zinger in his speech Saturday, squarely at Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny;

Ladies and gentlemen, your kitchen table is like mine. You sit there at night before you put the kids -- after you put the kids to bed and you talk, you talk about what you need. You talk about how much you are worried about being able to pay the bills. Well, ladies and gentlemen, that's not a worry John McCain has to worry about. It's a pretty hard experience. He'll have to figure out which of the seven kitchen tables to sit at.

And, as on cue, less then 24-hours later, we have Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny, brushing off his dementia of not knowing how many houses he has with this;

From Greg Sargent, at TPM;

McCain slipped a reference to his war captivity into an interview McCain did with CBS that's airing today. He appeared to be referring to Joe Biden's crack yesterday that McCain has trouble considering people's kitchen table issues because he has to decide which of his own seven kitchen tables to use...

"I am grateful for the fact that I have a wonderful life," McCain said. "I spent some years without a kitchen table, without a chair, and I know what it's like to be blessed by the opportunities of this great nation...So the fact is that we have homes, and I'm grateful for it."

To which Sargent also noted;

But the "McCain-as-POW" currency the McCain camp is printing at such a furious rate -- and throwing wads of at every controversy that comes along -- is now losing value faster than the German Mark after World War I.

POW-POW-POW hyperinflation alert!

POW-POW-POW ...

It didn't take me long to A) slap myself upside the head and, B) start searching for the Ultimate McCain Pow Song, found very quickly.

Mas Que Nada!

It's a classic, covered by a bevy of folks (younger readers will likely believe it came from the Black Eyed Peas), and while I knew who did the original hit (posted below), I was hoping to find the Dizzy Gillespie version of it - he really puts some good chops into it.

One of the things that makes this the Ultimate McCain Pow Song is its meaning;

From Wikipedia;

In Brazilian Portuguese slang "mas, que nada" means something like "yeah, right", "don't be silly", or "no way, man". Literally the words mean "but, that [is] nothing".

Fits rather nicely into picture here.

So, hum and, sing along if you can

Sergio Mendes & Brasil 66 - Mas Que Nada




And the next time (don't worry, it will be soon, very soon), Stumblin' Bumblin John McCain throws out the POW sob story, to excuse one of his miscues, flubs and gaffes (an ever-growing list), just start humming or singing 'Mas Que Nada'.

Much more pleasant to have this tune in your head, then the voice of "Whispering John" (H/T Barry Crimmins), bleating out another POW-laced excuse.


Bonus POW-POW-POW Links

kubla000: MoDowd Nails McCain's POW-POW-POW Defense w/ New Example ~ Updated: POW Ad Coming!

Maureen Dowd: Too Much of a Bad Thing

The Jed Report: A noun, a verb, and...

Ana Marie Cox: In His House There are Many Mansions

Sam Stein - Fineman: McCain Is Trivializing His POW Past

Steve Benen: A NOUN, A VERB, AND P.O.W...

Kagro X: McCain Eats the Seed Corn

No Sooner Had I Finished ...

"The insinuation, that John McCain, a former prisoner of war, doesn't know how many houses he has, is outrageous!"

McCain Waves The POW Flag

No Sooner Had I Finished ...

And, sure as you-know-what, satire gets usurped by reality.

THE POW CARD

After posting earlier today, we went out to the World Wide Web (Memeorandum), and, lo-and-behold, there was a McCain-sized-definition-of-rich number of posts, crying out the use of the POW Card, to explain away (or at least a finger in the dike), the complete ridicule Fly Boy was receiving, over his cluelessness on how many houses he owned.

When the post was written, I could think of a number of push backs the Stumblin Bumblin McCain Campaign may go with, but pulling out the now-getting-dog-eared POW Card was not one of them, and that is showing far more problems with the campaign (and candidate) then the MSM will ever admit.

As we alluded to in our previous post, this is getting embarrassing.

The gaffes, misspeaks, and just plain ignorance are bubbling up, more-and-more.

This is now the second time in less than a week, the Stumblin Bumblin' John McCain Campaign is hiding their bathrobe-clad, Slim Jim-juice-drooling candidate behind his POW experience.

And, in a bizzaro-world way, McCain's "how many houses do I own" gaffe, was somewhat of a silver lining.

Had he not blurted that gem out, the Stumblin' Bumblin McCain Campaign would have had a different conflagration to deal with, their candidates endorsement of establishing a draft again.

Small favors, huh?

Maybe questions need to be asked, if he is still, some 40+years later, crippled by that awful experience, perhaps, then, he needs to be in a Vet hospital, and not on the campaign trail.

Or, is the campaign using the POW Card as code, for his age?

They can't, very well, come out, throw up their hands and shrug "It's just another "senior moment" guys ..."

And all this is happening in the Dog Days of August ... Deadsville on the campaign trial, with vacations, and such, and, especially this year, with the Olympics going on.

You, practically, have to light yourself on fire to get any possible coverage, typically.

Christ, what's going to happen next month, after the VP choices, after the conventions?

We'll need one of the stat counters, like they use in boxing, to keep count of the jabs/punches-thrown in a given round, to have any hope of getting a count on Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny's stumbles and bumbles.

When they go to the debates, they'll have to add an extra scoreboard, with a running count of McCain's flubs and miscues.

Vegas will have to start issuing Over/Unders on this.

In fact, just to hedge my bets, I'm putting a marker down, here

It won't surprise me, if at the Republican Convention, Stumblin' Bumblin' McCain flies into Minneapolis as the "presumptive nominee", but a wee bit of monkey business goes on, and Stumblin' Bumblin' McCain flies out of Minneapolis with a ailment, ironically, like those old Russian leaders used to get, when it was their time to go.

Then again, the GOP knows (thanks to the inhabitants of the Bush Grindhouse) that they are completely fucked in November, and they might as well let Stumblin' Bumblin' McCain absorb the drubbing - at least, that way, they won't have to deal with him in 2012, mounting, "one more time", a presidential campaign.


Bonus House of Mirrors Links

Architectural Digest Visits Senator and Mrs. John McCain

Brandon Friedman: John McCain Needs to Lay Off the POW Talk

Spencer Ackerman: Use It Tonight

Marc Ambinder: McCain Is To Houses What GWBH Was To Grocery Store Scanners?

Sam Stein: McCain Camp Plays POW Card On House Gaffe

"The insinuation, that John McCain, a former prisoner of war, doesn't know how many houses he has, is outrageous!"

Or: Looking A Gift House In The Mouth

NARRATOR
Legendary was the Xanadu where Kubla Kahn decreed his stately pleasure dome - (with quotes in his voice) "Where twice five miles of fertile ground, with walls and towers were girdled 'round." (dropping the quotes) Today, almost as legendary is Florida's XANADU - world's largest private pleasure ground. Here, on the deserts of the Gulf Coast, a private mountain was commissioned, successfully built for its landlord. Here in a private valley, as in the Coleridge poem, "blossoms many an incense-bearing tree." Verily, "a miracle of rare device."

One hundred thousand trees, twenty thousand tons of marble, are the ingredients of Xanadu's mountain. Xanadu's livestock: the fowl of the air, the fish of the sea, the beast of the field and jungle - two of each; the biggest private zoo since Noah. Contents of Kane's palace: paintings, pictures, statues, the very stones of many another palace, shipped to Florida from every corner of the earth, from other Kane houses, warehouses, where they mouldered for years. Enough for ten museums - the loot of the world.

Oh ... Wait a minute ...

That's from 'Citizen Kane'...

She's a brick----house
Mighty might just lettin' it all hang out
She's a brick----house ...

No ...No ... That's The Commodores song...

Man, I getting all confused, and I don't have a staff I can refer it to, but I think it was Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain talking about how many houses he owns.

Expect, he couldn't remember how many houses he owns ...

He's back, walking around in the bathrobe again, mumbling incoherently, dripping the Slim Jim juice...

McCain unsure how many houses he owns

Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) said in an interview Wednesday that he was uncertain how many houses he and his wife, Cindy, own.

"I think - I'll have my staff get to you," McCain told us in Las Cruces, N.M. "It's condominiums where - I'll have them get to you.

Well, if he's throwing it back to his staff, I expect, if it hasn't happened already, that Nicole Wallace will reprise her sterling defense of Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny, of his cheating at the Saddleback Show, and get all plump-in-the-face, firing out a "The insinuation, that John McCain, a former prisoner of war, doesn't know how many houses he has, is outrageous!"

Actually, I am pretty stunned that he had to throw it to his staff to come up with the answer.

Where was his Mini-Me?

Why wasn't Joe Lieberman standing behind Stumblin' Bumblin' John, to step up and answer the question correctly?

About the only defense I think they can come up with, is that the interview in which Stumblin' Bumblin' Johnny gave this response, is that the interview must have taken place before 7:30AM, as in, unless he sleeps in, by his own admission, he's not exceptionally sharp that day.

Now, just in the not-to-distant past, Stumblin' Bumblin John McCain didn't know the difference between the Shiites and Sunnis, thought (at least twice), that Czechoslovakia was still a country, benighted as to the price of gas, confused Iraq-Pakistan Border, and, to mix things up a little, whored his wife out to a bunch of bikers.

So, he gets tossed a softball question of how many houses he owns, and he starts acting more befuddled than an Ed Wynn movie marathon.

If it hasn't crossed the line yet, it sure-as-hell is inches away, on how embarrassing this is, for the country, to have a presidential candidate that is such a stuttering fool.

Instead of hiring all the Rove Acolytes, maybe they should have reached back and brought in The Gipper's crew - at least they had the skill to hide his dementia until after he was elected.

Jesus, and we still have a little over two-months left ....


Bonus House Hunting Links

Michael Tomansky: Manna from heaven

Wonkette: John McCain Does Not Know How Many Baronial Estates He Has

John Cole: Coming to a Commercial Near You

Libby Spencer: McClueless

The Jed Report: Ooomph

John Aravosis (DC): Obama releases new ad over McCain "I don't know how many houses I own" gaffe

Jake Tapper and Sunlen Miller: People Who Live in Seven Glass Houses….

"It's Like These Guys Take Pride in Being Ignorant"

It would seem that the tread on the tires of Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain's tires are showing pretty bare, getting worn out, but he keeps them turning and turning ...

Yeah, that Obama Energy Policy Tire Gauge was a real winner ...

The more Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain mockingly fires that line out, the more armies of qualified, experienced people come out to, effectively say, that SB John is talking out of his ass

For example, here, via Think Progress;

In a post on the Wonk Room, Charles Territo, the director of communications for the Auto Alliance (which represents Chrysler, Ford, and GM, among others), notes some facts McCain should keep in mind:

• The Department of Energy estimates that 1.2 billion gallons of fuel were wasted in 2005 as a result of driving on under-inflated tires.

• Fuel efficiency is reduced by 1% for every 3 PSI that tires are under-inflated.

• Proper tire inflation can save the equivalent of about 1 tank of gas per year.

• Proper tire inflation also reduces CO2 emissions.

• Experts estimate that 25% of automobiles are running on tires with lower than recommended pressure, because people don’t know how to check their tires or don’t realize that tires naturally lose air over time.

And, yesterday, Barack Obama lined up the Dead Campaign Express for one, right in the kisser.

From Greg Sargent;

"So I told them something simple," Obama said. "I said, 'You know what? You can inflate your tires to the proper levels and that if everybody in America inflated their tires to the proper level, we would actually probably save more oil than all the oil we'd get from John McCain drilling right below his feet there, or wherever he was going to drill.'"...

"So now the Republicans are going around -- this is the kind of thing they do. I don't understand it! They're going around, they're sending like little tire gauges, making fun of this idea as if this is 'Barack Obama's energy plan.'

"Now two points, one, they know they're lying about what my energy plan is, but the other thing is they're making fun of a step that every expert says would absolutely reduce our oil consumption by 3 to 4 percent. It's like these guys take pride in being ignorant."

Here's the video of Obama's smackdown;

Obama Insists Inflating Tires Better Than Oil Drilling



Even Paris Hilton is telling him to put a sock in it;

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

It's getting to the point where someone is going to have to walk up on whatever stage Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain happens to be on and just take the microphone away from him, tell him to shut up and go sit down.

Unless, of course, he is filling with pride with being so ignorant.


Bonus McCain Flat Tire Riffs

Anonymous Liberal: Hop on the Pander Express

Skippy, the bush kangaroo: the gop's talking points are tired

The Jed Report: McCain's Austerity Program: Drive Less, Turn Out Lights

John Perr: Purple Heart Band-Aids and Tire Gauges

Steve Benen: Tires vs. light bulbs

New GOP Strategy - Whore Out Your Wife!

It's almost getting to the point, where I need to launch another blog, just to chronicle, and keep up with, the stumbles and bumbles of John McCain.

Hanging out with his "peeps", at the 62nd Sturgis Biker Rally in Sturgis, South Dakota today, SB John set in motion a new Republican strategy, apparently.

It's not an updated version of the Southern Strategy, and while he has gone negative, and has a boatload of Karl Rove spawn aboard the Dead Campaign Express (to which we may soon see a "dancing pole" installed), he appears to be eschewing a Rovian plan.

No siree, our Arizona Boy is lurching beyond the barriers, charting out new territory, setting new standards in what may be the ultimate "maverick" move;

He's whoring out Cindy!

"...at a biker rally in Sturgis, South Dakota, John McCain appears to have volunteered his wife for a topless beauty pageant: McCain felt so comfortable at the event that he even volunteered his wife for the rally's traditional beauty pageant, an infamously debauched event that's been known to feature topless women.

"I encouraged Cindy to compete," McCain said to cheers. "I told her with a little luck she could be the only woman ever to serve as first lady and Miss Buffalo Chip."

As a reader emails, "Miss Buffalo Chip has 'been known to feature topless women' in the same way that Guns and Ammo magazine has been known to feature firearms." Indeed, an ESPN.com columnist describes it as "occasionally bottomless."

Here's a video of what Mr. Keating Five was pushing his wife into;

Pour Some Sugar On Cindy McCain



Now, this is one of those delicious, Lose-Lose faux pas, that is so richly deserved for the Stumblin' Bumblin' McCain Campaign.

What does Steve Schmidt want to admit to;

A - They knew all about what the Ms. Buffalo Chip contest was, and were, for the sake of the campaign, hoping Cindy would jump right into it.

B - They are clueless, had no idea of the history of Sturgis, and the Ms. Buffalo Chip contest

It's one thing, if you're stumping at a Boys Club Jamboree, or a 4H Club event, and you need to pet a goat, ride a horse, milk a cow ... Something that plays out for a good, fun photo-op that gets splashed across the wires ...

It's entirely on another level, a deep disturbing level, when you have the potential (yeah, right) next President of the United States encouraging the potential next First Lady, to don a bikini, bump, grind and gyrate (and more) to the hoots of hairy, drunken bikers for a tongue-in-cheek, excuse-of-a-contest, whose only purpose is to see bikini-clad (and less) woman, bumping, grinding, and gyrating (and more).

And, personally, I believe it was extra cruel to put Cindy on the spot like this.

She's likely to waste hours, hunting on the Internet, for a "Buffalo Chip" recipe she can lift, and where she can find "buffalo chips" to use.

And it could get worse (though I doubt they would do it).

To strike back, maybe the Obama Campaign will send out g-strings, with "McCain's Energy Policy" stitched on them.


Bonus Stumblin' Bumblin' Whorin' Links

The Jed Report - McCain: Clueless and out of touch at Sturgis

Hilzoy: Miss Buffalo Chip

Bluegal: McCain Offers His Wife Up to Topless Biker Babe Beauty Contest

Jezebel: John McCain Will Pimp Cindy For Your Vote

Josh Marshall: Take My Wife, Please!

Steve Benen: John, Cindy, and the Miss Buffalo Chip Beauty Pageant

Wonkette: McCain Offers His Old Lady To Gas-Guzzling Bikers

You Wanted More Humor In The Campaign, Right John?

H/T to Libby Spencer, over on the Impolitic (and cross-posted on The Reaction) for this gem.

What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, right?

Stumblin Bumblin John McCain has been defending his race-card, misinformational, lying campaign ads on the premise that there should be "a little bit of humor" in the campaign

Perhaps you can have Cindy steal a pretzel recipe, so she can make some, while you kick back with some of her beer to watch this.

McCain: Britney & Paris Ad Parody

Is John McCain Buggering Little Boys?

No, he isn't, but that isn't the point.

With the brouhaha this past week, over the negative, and outright false, charges in Stumblin Bumblin' John McCain's campaign ads, particularly attacking Barack Obama for not visiting troops in Germany, and then defending the ad, and the lies, as "creating a narrative", Jill, over on Brilliant at Breakfast takes the SB McCain gameplan, and extends it out.

"Narrative." Even if it isn't true, even if it's utter horsepuckey, they believe that outright "lies" constitute a legitimate "narrative."

I propose we create a "narrative" in which John McCain has a habit of buggering little boys in the choir loft in the Baptist church he makes a point of saying he attends.

So what if it isn't true. It's a "narrative."

Well, like we stated the other day, "Why Do You Think We've Been Calling Him "Stumblin' and Bumblin"?"

Top Ten Cloves: Interations of New McCain Ad, Before Settling On Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and the Biggest Celebrity In The World

News Item: New McCain Ad Attacks Obama As A "Celebrity"


10. The Biggest Somalian-dressed candidate in the World

9. The Biggest Defeatocrat in the World

8. The Biggest Bitter Person in the World

7. The Biggest Worst Bowler in the World

6. The Biggest Friend of William Ayers in the World

5. The Biggest American with a Muslim name in the World

4. The Biggest Arugula Eater in the World

3. The Biggest Ears in the World

2. The Biggest “Arrogant” Martini Drinking Country Club Member in the World

1. The Biggest Cousin of Dick Cheney in the World


Bonus Stumblin Bumblin McCain Ad Links

Bill Press: John McCain Plays the Race Card

McCain: 'We're Proud of That Commercial'

Wonkette: Hilton Family FURIOUS Over McCain Insulting Paris Hilton

Warren Street: McCain Will Have to Go With Pity Before Too Long

Oliver Willis: McCain’s Britney Moment

Marc Ambinder: Weaver, McCain's Former Strategist, Calls "Celeb" Ad "Childish"

Why Do You Think We've Been Calling Him "Stumblin' and Bumblin"?

I've been taking it easy the past week, or so ... Partly due to the flow of things on the homefront, and also, kicking back a bit, an unannounced venture into "summer hours", and to catch a rest before the busy August on the horizon, with the Olympics and both conventions.

And, what do you know, all hell breaks loose!

WTF is going on with Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain?

Jesus, he might as well just start walking around in a bathrobe, like that old Mafia guy did, to play out that he was crazy.

Just ride around in the Dead Campaign Express, make some stops (kicking away the empty beer bottles to exit), shuffle around in the robe and slippers, shake a few hands, maybe pick up a few Slim Jims at a convenience store ...Toss out a few bon mots on his heroism, his POW days, as he rips off a piece of Slim Jim, perhaps dribbling some of the dark juice on his bathrobe.

I mean, he's down to just makin' shit up now ... Seemingly not caring what he says, how it sounds, what it looks like ... Just blathering on like ... Well ... Like an old guy shuffling around in a bathrobe, muttering incoherently

He couldn't do much worse than he has for the past two weeks.

And I am too tired to break down the multitude of faux pas, errors, lies, and the Stumblin' Bumblin John McCain campaign version of their kitchen sink, they've been tossing overboard.

So, rather than wax on, we'll keep it short and simple.

First, a tune that is likely to be playing by the time the Dead Campaign Express hits Minneapolis, and will grow louder and louder as we hurtle towards November.

The bonus of it, it is being sung by a good, staunch Republican - Sammy Davis Jr.

Sammy Davis Jr. - Who Can I Turn To (When Nobody Needs Me)




So You Can Catch Up With Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain

There are three great posts out on the World Wide Web that can give you a good running start in, knowledgeably calling McCain's bluff, and tracking the death of his campaign.

1. TPM Election Central's exhaustively-researched "Critic or Cheerleader? The Definitive McCain Iraq Timeline" ("A comprehensive time-line of John McCain's statements on Iraq, from the inception of the conflict to the present")

2. The Carpetbagger Report's Steven Benen's "Jukebox John keeps changing his tune" (72, and counting, flip-flops)

3. The Jed Report's Jed Lewison's "John McCain's Neverending War" (McCain "in his own words -- the lie behind his claim that he was the war's "greatest critic." It demonstrates his chilling commitment to fighting this war no matter what the people of America -- or Iraq -- want.)

John McCain's Neverending War




From here, to November, whatever Stumblin Bumblin' John McCain does, well, it's just icing on the cake.


Bonus Stumblin' Bumblin' John McCain Riffs

Things Younger Than McCain

Jon Perr: McCain Fails McCain’s Commander-in-Chief Test

The Bob Dole For The New Millennium