The Garlic

Thursday, June 25, 2009

You Light Up My Courtroom

I can, honestly, say I never, ever, liked this song.

It goes way beyond mere schmaltziness ...

Actually, schmaltz would be tolerable, preferable, a giant leap of mankind, over this drivel.

And, I won't burden, or inflict you with, what would only be pure evil, as to posting a YouTube of it (just check out some of those who recorded it - Lee Greenwood, Robert Goulet, Perry Como, Steve Lawrence - and you can see why just some plain, ol' schmaltz would be just fine).

About the only thing that could make this worse, is if John Denver sung this song (for others, it might be Billy Joel)

We speak, of course, about "You Light Up My Life", or, more specifically, the songs' mickey-slipping-rapist writer, Joseph Brooks.

Oscar-Winning Songwriter Is Charged in Sex Assaults

A 71-year-old Oscar-winning songwriter and director was arrested and charged on Tuesday with raping and sexually assaulting 11 women he lured from the Pacific Northwest to his East Side Manhattan apartment from 2005 to 2008 using Craigslist and a talent Web site, the Manhattan district attorney announced.

The songwriter, Joseph Brooks, whose hit, “You Light Up My Life,” won the Academy Award in 1978, surrendered early Tuesday and appeared later in State Supreme Court on a 91-count indictment.

[snip]

He said that Mr. Brooks was charged with using Craigslist to advertise for aspiring actresses in the Seattle and Portland areas, paying for their air fares to New York. Once they got to his apartment at 130 East 63rd Street, Mr. Morgenthau said, “they were forced to drink a large glass of wine” and assaulted. The wine may have been drugged, he said.

Two of them later complained to rape counselors. The others were tracked down after investigators seized Mr. Brooks’s computer, the district attorney said.

Jumpin' Jesus! ... 91 counts!

More like "You Light Up The Monster In Me!"

If they can't make any of the charges stick, just play the song to the jury ...

Bonus Links

Daily Mail: Oscar-winning composer, 71, 'raped 11 women using Craigslist to lure victims with promise of film role'

Steve Huff: Joseph Brooks: Accused of Rape, Guilty of Really, Really Bad 70s Cinema

We Told You Some Buns Would Be Steamed

Holy Mustard and Relish, Batman!

We didn't even have time to let this stew into a Retro Garlic post.

Just the other evening, we posted "This Is Going To Steam A Lot of Buns", about the Obama White House, and State Department's plans to invite Iranian officials to July 4th festivities.

Then, lo-and-behold, we see this out on the WWW;

Officials: President Obama reconsidering July 4 invitations to Iran

The Obama administration is seriously considering not extending invitations to Iranian diplomats for July 4 celebrations overseas, senior administration officials tell CNN.

The officials said intense discussions on the issue were taking place, but the final decision had not been made.

[snip]

The Obama administration had decided to invite Iranians to the celebrations at overseas posts as part of President Obama's policy of engaging the Iranian regime.

As part of that engagement Obama videotaped a message for the Iranian people on the Persian New year and U.S. officials have engaged members of the Iranian government.

[snip]

But officials said the violence against protesters that has ensued since the June 12 election has caused the administration to rethink the timing of such engagement.

One senior administration official said Wednesday the reconsideration of the July 4th invitations is consistent with Obama's comments Tuesday, in which he said he was "shocked and appalled" at the violence against demonstrators.

And, today, the confirmation;

No Hot Dogs For You

WH rescinds July 4 invites to Iranians

DUH!

Likely, standing around the barbecue, cracking heads, torturing and killing citizens might put a damper on generating the small talk;

The torture of a 17-year-old in Iran ... A teenager's story, with graphic photos, of abuse at the hands of Iran's religious paramilitaries, the Basij

Unimaginable Horror In Tehran Today

Hey, there's always Columbus Day to shoot for ...

This Date ... On The Garlic

25 June 2008... On The Garlic

Top Ten Cloves: Other Ways Ralph Nader Could Have Made News Today

Good Post Alert: Letter to Mesopotamia

25 June 2007... On The Garlic

Bong Hits 4 Roberts

It's Monday, And The Cheneypalooza Is Rolling On! ... ' Pushing the Envelope on Presidential Power'

25 June 2006... On The Garlic

Weekend Special - Sautéed Cloves

Poll Results - Our First Dead-Heat! ... The Garlic's Weekly Poll: With Karl Rove’s theme of Cut-and-Run for the GOP’s Fall Mid-Term Elections, what Rove really means is ...

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Governor Gaucho!

The 1927 movie, staring the great Douglas Fairbanks (and Lupe Velez), 'The Gaucho', carried this riveting teaser;

A glorious tale of gay adventure and romantic daring on the wild plains of South America!

Saints and cutthroats! Shrines and robbers' lairs! A madcap mountain lass and a bandit chieftain---the Gaucho! A fiery tale of the most picturesque adventure beyond the Andes!

If Fairbanks was the prototype swashbuckler, than South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford takes the crown for being the seminal "swashbumbler".

We really wanted to stay away from this story, as it exploded on the World Wide Web over the past two, or three, days.

It was clear, from the get-go, that this madcap adventure by Governor Gaucho was FUBAR, all the way.

And, we do want to give props to Larisa Alexandrovna, who was on-the-money, early today - before Governor Gaucho's pathetic press conference - with "Did Gov. Sanford go on vacation with a mistress?";

Now, if I remember correctly, Argentina has phones and televisions. Why could his staff or anyone else not reach him for nearly a week? Moreover, his security detail was not with him. So unless the guy actually was in rehab all this time, the only other logical explanation is that he went on an unplanned trip or lied about a planned trip and wanted to keep it secret, to the point of causing national hysteria regarding his disappearance. The only reason to be that secretive is if you are taking a trip with a special friend.

I should note that I am speculating and have absolutely no proof that Sanford was vacationing with a lover. Yet as an investigative reporter I can tell you that his story is not credible.

Yes, Governor Gaucho was "vacationing with a lover"

I will speculate, that Team Governor Gaucho would have stuck to the story, that he was out, hiking the Appalachian Trail, if only it didn't surface that the First Day of Summer, this past Sunday, when Governor Gaucho was said to be on-the-trails, happened to be National Hike Naked Day.

Story not credible?

How's this endorsement, from his wife, yesterday, as Team Gaucho Governor still was running with the intrepid hiker line;

A CNN reporter tracked down Jenny Stanford at her Sullivan Island vacation home. Sounding less like the wife of a 2012 presidential contender and more like America's favorite reality TV star announcing her separation from her husband, she said: "I am being a mom today. I have not heard from my husband. I am taking care of my children."

Jenny Stanford had helped stoke the story yesterday when she told the AP she didn't know where her husband was.

It's unclear why hiking the Appalachian Trail would be something Sanford would keep from his wife.

What Was Rory Gilmore Doing At Governor Gaucho's Press Conference?

So, all the whispers ended today, when Governor Gaucho stood up to do a rambling Press Conference (and yes, he has separated from his wife, so, thankfully, we didn't get the Mrs. David-Vitter-Tammy Wynette-Stand-By-Your-Man, Bad-Politician's-Wife-Theatre), perhaps, attempting to stay ahead of this strengthening tsunami-of-a-story, and the hometown paper, that has, and will be printing (drumroll, please), EMAILS!!

"Two, mutual feelings .... You have a particular grace and calm that I adore. You have a level of sophistication that so fitting with your beauty. I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificent gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curve of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of the night's light - but hey, that would be going into sexual details ..."

Good call there, Governor Gaucho, don't go there ...

And, one more thing about the press conference.

You can watch it HERE (via MSNBC), and, shortly after it starts, behind Governor Gaucho, and, also, a man in white polo shirt, is a young woman, who, uncannily, looks like Rory Gilmore.

Was the Yale Bulldog covering this?

Roland Hedley Aiming For A Pulitzer

One of Gary Trudeau's amazing characters, Roland Hedley, on his Twitter account, has been pounding the pavement on the Governor Gaucho story - Thankfully!

A sample ...

Prearranged for me to ask second question at Sanford presser. Will be reading question from Argentinian hiker.

Haley Barbour waits 4 mins, then elbows past Ensign, steps over Sanford: "Excuse me, y'all. Comin' through. Excuse me..."

Just terminated 14 email relationships. No more direct messages, please.

Children, elderly banned from Sanford presser over concerns of possible Full Monty.

Sanford story checking out. Campers in Ecuador, Bolivia, Paraguay report sightings of fast-moving, naked hiker.

Lastly, another bizarre, ironic twist to the Tale of Governor Gaucho.

H/T to @Will Bunch, who pointed to this article, from earlier in the month;

Sanford touts individual readiness ... Governor urges residents to have evacuation plans, emergency kits with proper supplies

We will be hearing, in the days, weeks, and months ahead, all about Governor Gaucho's "individual readiness".

Olé - Bonus Governor Gaucho Riffs

Zachary Roth: Sanford Press Conference Leaves Unanswered Questions

Will Bunch: No one would ever look for OUR governor on the Appalachian Trail!

Blu Gal: Dear Mrs. Sanford

Skippy, The Bush Kangaroo: what is it with these repressed republicans?

Think Progress: Will Republicans ‘Ask Questions’ Of Sanford, Rather Than ‘Circle The Wagons For One Of Our Tribe’?

Joe Gandelman: Two Reasons Why Mark Sanford’s Political Career Is Now Dead

This Date ... On The Garlic

24 June 2008... On The Garlic

Hey, Hoyer (and Pelosi) ... Politico ... Suck On This!

Bet On The Bug Shit

Yeah, Karl, We Certainly Know The Type

Forget The Green-Screen, Why Show Him Throwing Out Garbage?

24 June 2006... On The Garlic

More Cheneypalooza! 'A Different Understanding With the President'

24 June, 2005... On The Garlic

High Court Approves Bush's 'Clean City Act'; 5-4 Decision Paves Way for Govt. Cherry-Picking Eminent Domain Properties

Frist Distances Himself From Gitmo MD's; Ethical Issues Reveled; Frist Says He's Never Made Exam or Viewed Tape

Top Ten Cloves: Other Different Philosophies, According to White House PR Man Scott McClellan, That Karl Rove Has

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

This Is Going To Steam A Lot of Buns

I'm with Spencer Ackerman on this one;

No Hot Dogs For Iranian Regime Skullcrackers

This started out, at the beginning of the month;

A New Iran Overture, With Hot Dogs

SAN SALVADOR — Having sent the Iranian people a video greeting on their New Year, President Obama is now inviting them to help celebrate a quintessentially American holiday, the Fourth of July.

Last Friday, the State Department sent a cable to its embassies and consulates around the world notifying them that “they may invite representatives from the government of Iran” to their Independence Day celebrations — annual receptions that typically feature hot dogs, red-white-and-blue bunting and some perfunctory remarks about the founding fathers.

Then, following the rigged election, the protests, the murder of their citizens, the State Department has indicated that if still intends to fire-up the barbecue, and keep the Regime Thugs on the A-List;

There's no thought to rescinding the invitations to Iranian diplomats," State Department spokesman Ian Kelly told reporters.

"We have made a strategic decision to engage on a number of fronts with Iran," Kelly said. "We tried many years of isolation, and we're pursuing a different path now."

But he said it was not clear if Iranian diplomats had accepted the invitations.

Maybe those representing the Iranian Regime can bring some of their homeland games to the bash.

You know, things like the "three-legged-races", where they could have two Iranians, perhaps imprisoned protesters, with only three legs between the two ...

Or, "Bobbing for Apples", which, I might think, for the Iranian Regime, that this is just a variation of Waterboarding, only the players are kneeling, having the Royal Guards assisting them, holding their heads in the water, so they will have a better chance, presumably, of "snaring" one of the apples ...

I hope the State Department has balls, that, instead of "red-white-and-blue bunting", they hang "green-and-white".

Perhaps, invite those banned soccer players, as well.

GREEEEEEEEEEEEN! Turns To Blue

Well, that could be black-and-blue, for all we know.

Last week, in GREEEEEEEEEEEEN!, we offered the story of the heroics of members of the Iranian Soccer Team, wearing green wrist bands (or arm bands), during their match in the World Cup qualifier round.

Today, the other shoe (soccer and otherwise) dropped;

Iran bans election protest footballers

Their gesture attracted worldwide comment and drew the attention of football fans to Iran's political turmoil. Now the country's authorities have taken revenge by imposing life bans on players who sported green wristbands in a recent World Cup match in protest against Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's disputed re-election.

According to the pro-government newspaper Iran, four players – Ali Karimi, 31, Mehdi Mahdavikia, 32, Hosein Ka'abi, 24 and Vahid Hashemian, 32 – have been "retired" from the sport after their gesture in last Wednesday's match against South Korea in Seoul.

[snip]

Most of the players obeyed instructions to remove the armwear at half-time, but Mahdavikia wore his green captain's armband for the entire match. The four are also said to have been banned from giving media interviews.

The fate of the other two players who wore the wristbands is unknown. None of the team members were given back their passports upon returning to Tehran after the match, which ended in a 1-1 draw – a result that ended Iran's hopes of qualifying for next year's tournament.

[snip]

Ahmadinejad, a known football fan, has taken a close interest in the sport's affairs. In 2006 Iran was banned from international competition by the world governing body Fifa after claims of improper interference by his government. The ban was later lifted.

This year the national team coach Ali Daei was sacked, reportedly on Ahmadinejad's orders, after a 2-1 home defeat by Saudi Arabia.

Oh, boy ...

It is going to come to the Iranian Regime, sooner, or later, that they should be paying attention to the final stanza of lyrics, of ''Bein' Green' (from Ray Charles) that we posted previously;

When green is all there is to be
It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why
Wonder green and it'll do fine, cause' it's beautiful
And I think it's what I want to be

From the rooftops ... Allah Akbar!

The New Majority Eschews Spell Check

"Spelling? ... What spelling? ... We don't have to show you no spelling ... We don't have to show you no stinking spelling! ..."

Apologies to B.Traven, for hijacking his prose, but we got ourselves some similar nasty bandits running around.

I guess, if you are Pat Buchanan, and you are going to start a New Majority, a new, English-Only Super Race, who has time for Spell Check.

It is, after all, a mandate for "English-Only", not, necessarily, correct English, or correctly spoken, and spelled, English.

Grunting, and hand-gestures (English language, of course) is just as good.

Spelling?

That's for those non-white, arugula-eating lefties ...

The new Uber-Majority isn't going to play that game ...

Under Misspelled Banner, Buchanan And White Nationalist Brimelow Argue For English-Only Initiatives

On Saturday, Pat Buchanan hosted a conference to discuss how Republicans can regain a majority in America. During one discussion, panelists suggested supporting English-only initiatives as a prime way of attracting “working class white Democrats.” The discussion ridiculed Judge Sotomayor for the fact that she studied children’s classics to improve her grammar while attending college. The panelists also suggested that, without English as the official language, President Obama would force Americans to speak Spanish.

One salient feature of the event was the banner hanging over the English-only advocates. The word conference was spelled “Conferenece."

Melissa McEwan labeled it, simply as "In Shit You Can't Make Up", while Andrew Sullivan suggested it is a "Malkin Award Nominee".

Kos, added a P.S. to his post, that was most wry;

p.s. When we're talking Spanish, yes, we're talking about you.

Maybe now, the MSNBC suits can sit down and provide an answer to MediaMatters (MSNBC's continued embrace of Pat Buchanan shows it still hasn't learned from Savage, Imus, Matthews fiascoes)

Meanwhile, someone send Buchanan, and his Uber-band of racist xenophobes, the Talking Words Factory™ DVD

Bonus Buchanan Uber Majority Riffs

Ali Frick: Leading White Nationalist To Speak At Pat Buchanan’s American Cause Conference This Month

Jamison Foser: While hanging out with white nationalist, Buchanan again attacks Sotomayor

Wonkette: English-Only Wingnut Conference Can’t Spell ‘Conference’

Ta-Nehisi Coates: Layers Upon Layers Of Fail

I Wonder Where They Learned This Trick?

I guess, in war, or revolutions, you either have to win, or die.

Otherwise, you get hit with a bill.

Here's a good head-shaker for you;

Iranian military said to charge family of dead son 'bullet fee'

The family of Kaveh Alipour, a 19-year-old Iranian killed amidst protests in Tehran, was allegedly charged a "bullet fee" by Iranian security forces, according to a report Tuesday in the Wall Street Journal.

"Upon learning of his son's death, the elder Mr. Alipour was told the family had to pay an equivalent of $3,000 as a "bullet fee"—a fee for the bullet used by security forces—before taking the body back," relatives purportedly told the Journal.

Details of Alipour's death remain unclear -- he was apparently not part of the protests and may have been killed in crossfire.

Because the slain Kaveh Alipour was an innocent bystander, is there a discount? ... Does the family get to haggle? ... Can the family go out to eBay, or Overstock, find a suitable replacement bullet, and, would the Iranian Regime accept that as payment?

Before you shake you head too much, where did we hear of something like this before?

Hmmmm ...

Oh yeah, The Bush Grindhouse!

Pentagon Demands Wounded Soldier Return Re-enlistment Bonus

Just in time for the holidays, there's a special place in Hell just waiting to be filled by some as-yet-unknown Pentagon bureaucrat. Apparently, thousands of wounded soldiers who served in Iraq are being asked to return part of their enlistment bonuses -- because their injuries prevented them from completing their tours.

From Pittsburgh's KDKA;

A few months later Fox was sent home. His injuries prohibited him from fulfilling three months of his commitment. A few days ago, he received a letter from the military demanding nearly $3,000 of his signing bonus back.

"I tried to do my best and serve my country. I was unfortunately hurt in the process. Now they're telling me they want their money back," he explained.

These dwarfs, finks, phonies and frauds don't miss a trick, do they ...

It's like Joe Pesci said in Casino, "Always the dollars ... Always the fuckin' dollars ..."

Senator Bob Corker ... Instant Ignorant Dolt ... And, Flaming Asshole!

Oh yes, he gets Instant Ignorant Dolt status, for sure, but now, he's forcing us to put in some OT, to work a little harder, to figure out all that needs to go into firing up an "Instant Asshole" category.

Corker Impatiently Blows Off Meeting With Sotomayor Because She Was Slowed By Temporary Disability

Last Thursday, Sen. Bob Corker (R-TN) was scheduled to meet with Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor. Yet when Sotomayor was delayed because of her recent injury, Corker decided that he had more important things to do than to wait around for a potential lifetime appointee who is temporarily disabled:

Sen. Bob Corker blew off his meeting with Sonia Sotomayor last week. Hobbling along with her leg in a cast, she was 10 minutes late and he said he didn’t feel like waiting. “I decided to proceed on to the next meeting,” he told a Tennessee Press Association breakfast in Chattanooga.

Christy Hardin Smith chipped in "Why am I getting that "true colors shining through" feeling here from strutting peacock Sen. Bob Corker ..."

Let us hope Senator Bob Corker doesn't have to go through being inflicted with a disability.

We sure would hate to see anyone ignorantly blow him off ...

If you have time Senator Corker, if you can fit it into your busy schedule, stop by and pick up your Instant Ignorant Dolt (and Flaming Asshole) awards.

Bonus Corker Instant Ignorant Dolt Riffs

Jeff Woods: Corker Blows Off Meeting with Sotomayor

DownWithTyranny: A Handful Of GOP Obstructionists Still Want To Rail Against Sonia Sotomayor-- Just For The Sake Of Being Dicks

This Date ... On The Garlic

23 June 2008... On The Garlic

What's Next ... An "Ek-A-Lec-Tic" Reading List?

Top Ten Cloves: Other Things, Besides The Internet, That John McCain May Be Aware Of

RIP George Carlin ... And Start The Investigation

23 June 2007... On The Garlic

"I Am Spartacus" ... The Bush Grindhouse and Cheneypalooza

23 June 2006... On The Garlic

Top Ten Cloves: Other Big, Breaking News Senator Rick Santorum Is Eager To Announce

23 June 2005... On The Garlic

Al Qaeda, OSHA Clash Over Workplace Safety; With Iraq As Training Facility, Safety Agency Wants Compliance

Disney Parks Overrun As Southern Baptists End Boycott; Gates Locked On Mob By 11AM; Nagging Children Key To Breaking Stalemate

Biden Looking At Presidential Run In 2008; Taking First Step of Staffing, Including Proofreaders and Fact Checkers

Winn-Dixie Announces Cuts of 22,000 Jobs; Movie Bombed, Cost Increases Prolong Bankruptcy

Top Ten Cloves: Other Things The Los Angles Times Might Experiment With

Monday, June 22, 2009

Top Ten Cloves: Possible Reasons There Was More Votes Than Voters In Iran

News Item: Worst. Damage Control. Ever

10. Looking back over the old Shah of Iran's playbook, to see what went wrong

9. Surprisingly, Ralph Nader got about 4% of the over-vote

8. Ballot-stuffing teams didn't stop to watch Susan Boyle

7. It was a sign, for Ahmandinejad to get almost a 2-1 ratio of votes, that he successfully employed Karl Rove's New Math

6. Ken Blackwell was seen, hanging around the Vote-Counting room

5. Supreme Leader didn't want to spend the money to do the "purple-finger" thing

4. Was a condition, for Ahmandinejad to name Dick Cheney as the head of his committee to vet the Vice President slot

3. CIA got wires crossed, thought Obama White House wanted to keep Ahmandinejad in office

2. Actually, some of the Die-Bold machines crashed, as a 3-1 ratio for Ahmandinejad was what was planned

1. Since everyone is using Twitter, thought that everyone got 140 votes each

Bonus Iran Riffs

Prairie Weather: "Oops. We screwed up. But that doesn't change the results of the vote."

Steve Benen: WHEN STRONG VOTER TURNOUT IS TOO STRONG...

NYT: Iranian Guards Issue Warning as Vote Errors Are Admitted

Robin Wright: In Iran, One Woman's Death May Have Many Consequences

James Joyner: 'Watching the Fall of Islamic Theocracy'

Steve Clemons: Khamenei's Mystique Shattered in Eyes of Iranians

GREEEEEEEEEEEEN!

"It's Now All of Iran!"

Somebody Check Jim Baker's Passport!

Tweedle-Dee, Twitter-Dough ... Dell Cashes In

Unless you have completely avoided turning your television on, or, did so, sticking your fingers in your ears, and screaming "LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA", in order not to hear any news, you are hip to the incredible promotion of Twitter, for the role it is playing in the Iranian Revolution.

We mentioned it Saturday, how "CNN has been on-the-case (albiet, doing mucho reporting on posts from Twitter, Facebook and others). Perhaps we need to come up with a new code, being, if "RT is "Re-Tweet", that CNN has been engaged in "RBRT" (Rebroadcasting Re-Tweets)."

Today, SiliconValley.Com picks up on it;

Unrest in Iran raises profile for Twitter

Twitter is suddenly in our face, from the front page of The New York Times to places like Twitterfall, a tweet-search site whose users have turned their logos green in support of Iranian reformist Mir Hossein Mousavi.

For protesters and their global supporters, privately held Twitter is a free, real-time and nearly censor-proof way to organize, inform and inspire one another. The Iran protest effort is already being called the Twitter Revolution.

[snip]

Twitter officials didn't return calls seeking comment about its business plans or mushrooming traffic — Compete.com recorded 19.7 million unique visitors in May, while some estimates put the monthly number much higher at 30 million — or the State Department's request that the company postpone its system maintenance last week to keep the tweet-tap flowing.

[snip]

Co-founder Biz Stone pointed that out in an interview last year with the Mercury News.

"We took it beyond text messaging," he said, "so that information could be delivered to anything — to IM, to your computer, to your cell phone. Then exposed enough of our technology and infrastructure so that other developers could build onto our message platform."

Stone's comments then about Twitter's potential uses as an organizing tool for both protests and disaster relief now seem prophetic.

"It's the huge numbers and the instant nature of it," he said. "For a shared event, something happening in the moment, Twitter is the perfect tool and people are using it to move as a group."

All fine and good, however, there is another revolution brewing, that is bound to produce crocodile tears on Madison Avenue.

Dell Says It Has Earned $3 Million From Twitter

These days, lots of companies are talking about their “Twitter strategy,” but few have figured out how to measure what amassing hundreds of thousands of followers on Twitter does for their businesses. Dell has shown that it can go directly to the top line.

Dell said Thursday night that the company had earned $3 million in revenue directly through Twitter since 2007, when it started posting coupons and word of new products on the microblogging site. In the last six months, Dell Outlet earned $1 million in sales from customers who came to the site from Twitter, after taking 18 months to earn its first $1 million. Dell has also earned another $1 million from people who click from Twitter to Dell Outlet to Dell.com and make a purchase there.

Dell joins companies like Starbucks, JetBlue and Whole Foods as one of the most active corporate Twitter users. “It’s a great way to fix customer problems and hear what customers have to say, it’s a great feedback forum and it leads to sales — how can you miss?” said Richard Binhammer, who works in Dell’s corporate affairs office and is active on its Twitter accounts.

[snip]

Dell also announces company and product news and talks directly with customers, responding to complaints or asking for feedback. There are about 200 Dell employees who talk to customers on Dell’s Twitter accounts, from a gaming expert to a server expert to members of the chief technology officer’s staff, Mr. Binhammer said.

For example, as I wrote in an article on the various ways people use Twitter, Dell heard on Twitter that customers thought the apostrophe and return keys were too close together on the Dell Mini 9 laptop and fixed the problem on the Dell Mini 10. Now, the Dell Mini product development team is asking around on Twitter for new ideas for the next generation of the computer.

I have to suspect, ad agencies across the land, since seeing this, are trying to conjure up plans, on how they can charge their clients hundreds-of-thousands, to millions, of dollars, to design and implement their "Twitter campaign".

Will we someday see a runner (perhaps a bankrupted, disheveled ex-ad-agency person), charging up the aisle with a sledgehammer, hurling it into a giant, jumbotron-sized screen of Twitter (and, it smashing in exactly 140 pieces)?

Link:

It's fairly certain, that 2010, will not be anything like 2009, at least in Twitterland ...

Bonus Twitter Riffs

MG Siegler: Twitter Is Down: 15 Alternative Things To Do

Will Leitch: How Tweet It Is ... Sure, the Twitter guys still have no idea how to make money off their fabulous invention. But for now they are living in a dreamworld of infinite possibilities, maybe the last one on Earth

Rio Palof: Twitter switch for Guardian, after 188 years of ink ... Newspaper to be available only on messaging service ... Experts say any story can be told in 140 characters

Consider This A Public Service

Roland Hedley, Star Journalist

This Date ... On The Garlic

22 June 2008... On The Garlic

"This Is The Capitulation We Have Been Waiting For!" ... Or; "A Cave-In You Can Believe In"

Has Anyone Asked The Oil Companies This Question?

Top Ten Cloves: Other Possible Reasons Scottish Pupils Don't Do Well In Exams

22 June 2007... On The Garlic

Clock's Ticking Again - Some More Heads To Be Pulled Out of Asses ... Step Right Up Dorothy Rabinowitz ... And Richard Cohen

Red Rover, Red Rover, Send Dickie Right Over ... Its' A Cheneypalooza!

22 June 2006... On The Garlic

New GOP/RNC Slogan - “Two Parties Enter ... One Party Leads” – Echoes Through Senate Today; GOP Taunts Dems After Shooting Down Pullout Vote; Takes On New ‘Mad Max” Slogan To Laud Majority And Cool Down Cut-And-Run Charges

Top Ten Cloves: Things President Bush Can Do To Boost His Popularity In Europe

22 June 2005... On The Garlic

Rice Threatens Egypt and Saudi Arabia; Urges Democratic Reform or "We'll Throw Your Countries Into Turmoil just like we've done with Iraq"

Banana Republic Group Blasts Bush, Bolton; "These Guys Are Making Us Look Like A Dynasty"

Top Ten Cloves: Ways Ken Tomlinson Will Try To Survive His Latest Scandal

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Summertime!

Happy First Day of Summer!

However, if you are in the Northeast, not much joy to spread around, stuck in this dreary, wet, cool weather pattern, for yet another day (or two, or three) ... It's almost becoming an episode of 'The Twilight Zone', where we see the sun no more ...

But we digress ...

Today is the longest day of the year, the Summer Solstice, and the astronomical beginning of summer in the Northern Hemisphere

We posted this song to ring in the new season last year, and, since it is one, major, kick-ass rendition, we're puttin' it up again!

angelique kidjo summertime

Other Tastes?

Summertime Billie Holiday

Janis Joplin - Summertime (Live Gröna Lund 1969)

IN THE SUMMER TIME/MUNGO JERRY

Joe Cocker - Summer in the City

The Lovin' Spoonful - Summer In The City (Hot Mono 45)

Why Should You Feel Lucky Today?

Who says today is a lucky day? ... Why should you feel lucky today, and not me? ... What are they, just handing out luck? ... Anybody can be lucky, is that what you're telling me?

It's not exactly news that you can find, virtually, anything out on the World Wide Web.

So, if you happen to be Orthodox Jewish, that means you have your very own Google.

Or, to be correct, Koogle!

We espied this gem, out on Open Salon, from Luland Phoebe;

Shalom Kosher Koogle

What to do you if you are a devoutly religious ultra-Orthodox Jew, one of 800,000 or so in Israel and Rabbinic laws have forbidden you from surfing the great satan internet? How are you going to buy that new Tallit from Lands End Talit.com?

Fortunately, the Rabbis came up with a gem of an idea. Meet Kosher Google Koogle.

Koogle will not allow you to venture to places where one can look at women in immodest attire. You can't purchase items that are verboten. Koogle will not allow you to buy anything on the Sabbath. It just won't work. Kind of like having an itty- bitty little Rabbi on your shoulder at all times. That shouldn't scare anyone at all.

[snip]

So this begs the question. Where are these truly utra-Orthodox Jews using these forbidden computers if they are not allowed to own one?

And, no, it doesn't appear that there is a "I'm Feeling Lucky" box.

More Koogle

Koogle, a kosher Google, launches

Nothing can be posted on Saturdays, the Jewish Sabbath, as Jews are banned from all types of work and business activity. If Koogle users attempt to search for an item or post a message on the Sabbath, it crashes and won’t let you.

The label ‘Koogle’ is a play on the name of a Jewish noodle pudding dish, known as kugel, and Google, the search market leader.

Israeli company launches kosher search engine Koogle

Koogle is not a filter for surfers who want to access secular websites. Rather, it is a compilation of Israeli resources deemed inoffensive by the administrators. It includes news, business directories and links to realtors, kosher restaurants, hotels as well as mohels, or ritual circumcisers, and rehab centers.

Kosher Google Makes Debut as Koogle

Koogle also was the brand name for a flavored peanut butter marketed by Kraft Foods in 1971 but later was discontinued

Retro Garlic ... “There’s a food Ponzi scheme going on’’

Food, Inc. has opened in movie theaters this weekend, or, more to the point, in wider release.

In today's Boston Globe, Devra First interviews director/producer Robert Kenner;

Filmmaker offers 'Food' for thought

Q. Yet it seems so perfectly timed, with all the food-safety scares we’ve seen recently, the growing interest in locally produced foods, books such as Michael Pollan’s “Omnivore’s Dilemma’’ . . .

A. I feel like we’re part of an exploding movement. There are so many things coming to a head. On the one hand, there’s the financial crisis. People are realizing there was a credit Ponzi scheme, and we’re all paying the price. The government didn’t regulate it. The parallels with the food world are pretty identical. There’s a food Ponzi scheme going on. The system is totally unsustainable. It’s based on gasoline, based on pollution. Twenty to 25 percent of our carbon footprint is from growing and transporting food.

[snip]

Q. The movie seems as much about corporate power as it is about what we eat.

A. It’s about our rights, our First Amendment rights. We’re not being given information, and we’re being denied certain rights because of the “veggie libel laws’’ that make it dangerous to disparage a food. People used to be scared of governments having so much power. Now we’re realizing it’s the corporations that have it.

Q. And yet corporations aren’t particularly well represented in the film, often declining comment. It seems they missed their chance to control their message, leaving the floor to people like Barbara Kowalcyk and Moe Parr.

A. I could have done a film on nuclear terrorism and had greater access than I had here. I wanted to talk to all producers, organic and industrial. I found the industrial producers ultimately didn’t want me to look in their kitchens. They didn’t want to go on camera. They don’t want us thinking about our food. There’s this myth that our food still comes from farms. They don’t want you to know what’s in it or how it’s produced.

The Retro Part;

Strap On Your Tinfoil Chefs' Hats

Food, Inc

Bonus Food Riffs

M'm! M'm! Good!

Forget About Tuesday, Cash On The Barrelhead Today, Wimpy!

Top Ten Cloves: Ways To Tell Tomatoes Are Safe Again

Spam-A-Lot ...The Eating Kind!

Top Ten Cloves: Ways Spinach Industry Plans To Overcome E. Coli Setback

"He Stops ... He Pops ..." ... Slippery Sam Jones

We have an indulgence today, as one of our boyhood heroes is in the news.

Boston Celtic legend Sam Jones (the "Slippery" moniker was given to him by legendary radio announcer Johnny Most).

Sam Jones owns the second-most championship rings on any player (10, only one less than teammate, Bill Russell), a clutch-shooting guard, who mastered the bank shot.

Often, from either the fast break, or a set play, Sam would pull up, from about 12-15-feet out, off to the side, and launch a sweet jump shot, banking it in with a swish.

Jones gets honored this week, by the New England Sports Museum, as one of seven, for their contributions to Boston sports;

Honoring a big shot ... Celtics legend Sam Jones was there when it counted

It's hard to pick out some quotes to highlight, for one, there are so many (his "stool" fight with Wilt Chamberlain, being one), and secondly, so much of it is so vivid for me, having been there, at "The Garden" for so many of his heroics.

He is a five-time All-Star, a Hall of Famer, one of the league’s top 50 players, and his game-winning shot in the 1969 Finals against the Lakers - taken off the wrong foot with seven seconds left, bouncing around the rim and in - is one of the greatest in playoff history.

Yes, that season of 1969 was the year the Boston Celtics, defending champions, were supposed to be dead.

They were aging, and injuries contributed to their coming in 4th place, with most sports pundits counting them out.

It was to be the Year-of-the-Lakers, Wilt Chamberlain having been traded to LA, giving them a formidable line-up of Wilt, Jerry West, and Elgin Baylor.

As it happened, they met in the finals, and West lighting them up for 54 in Game One (In LA), and forty-something in Game Two (both won by LA) ... Back to Boston, Celts win Game 3 and, in Game 4, Lakers are up by one, with about 10-seconds left, when Emmette Bryant stole the ball, with seven-seconds left.

From NBA.com;

16. 1969, Game 4: Sam Jones' Picket Fence
Only Bill Russell won more rings as a player than ten-time champion Sam Jones, one of the great clutch players of all time. In the closing seconds of Game 4, the Celtics ran a real-life version of the Hoosiers "picket fence". Jones came off the screens and got a shooter's roll to beat the Lakers 89-88, tying the series 2-2 and setting up one of the great upsets in Finals history

Actually, they have it wrong, it was an old Ohio State play, drawn up in the huddle by John Havlicek and Larry Siegfried.

And, I searched, for about an hour, for the photo that was in the papers the following day, a set of two, the first, showing the ball leave Jones' hand, as Wilt, Russell, and others are in the foreground, vying for position of a rebound .. There was no rebound, as the second photo captures Wilt, a look of anguish on his face, with his hands on the ball, just as it was coming out of the bottom of the net ...

The Celts went on to win Game 7, in LA, thanks to a shot by Don Nelson, that hit the rim, bounced high up, and then down, through the basket.

Jones, also, will be known in posterity, as part of the infamous "Havlicek Stole The Ball".

"All right, Greer's putting the ball into play . . . He gets it out deep and Havlicek steals it! Over to Sam Jones! Havlicek stole the ball! It's all over! Johnny Havlicek is being mobbed by the fans. It's all over! Johnny Havlicek stole the ball! Oh, boy, what a play by Havlicek at the end of this ballgame! Johnny Havlicek stole the ball on the pass-in. Oh, my, what a play by Havlicek! A spectacular series comes to an end in spectacular fashion! John Havlicek being hoisted aloft . . . He yells and waves his hands. Bill Russell wants to grab Havlicek . . . He hugs him. He squeezes John Havlicek. Havlicek saved this ballgame. Believe that! Johnny Havlicek saved this ballgame. The Celtics win it, 110-109. We'll be back with our wrapup in just one minute!
-- Johnny Most, describing the end of a basketball game played at Boston Garden April 15, 1965.

(You can go HERE, to hear the radio call)

For, at least, one more night, Sam Jones will be in Boston, and he'll stop, and pop, igniting so many great memories.

Bonus Riffs

Celtics-Lakers ... Not Quite The Old Days, But It Will Do

A Personal Note: The End For A True, True, Icon - Red Auerbach